Too spoopy

“people” with instagram ready rooms arent human

what is this

people who decorate their living space solely based on how instagrammable it is. minimalism, fairy lights, some lame Breathe. Beautiful. wall decal, a single succulent on the nightstand. impeccably clean and empty, occupied by someone who’s personality is also empty

you can just say rich people

Always remember.

this is a great summary of ‘conditional probability’, a statistical property many people grapple with 

…I feel like this post just made me realize that both coconut trees and vending machines, items often quoted in wacky death statistics, are both things that people shake vigorously often. 

If I walk into a store and it doesn’t have mannequins like these then they just lost a customer 

I NEED TO KNOW HOW THIS OUTFIT LOOKS ON A BACKFLIP

when guys are like “girls over [relatively low weight] shouldn’t wear [revealing article of clothing]” a lot of the time they are trying to get women above that weight to say “OH REALLY?” and post a picture of themselves looking good in that article of clothing. It’s a creepy power play designed to prey on both women’s confidence and their insecurities and trick them into posting revealing pictures of themselves for the sexual gratification of men who they otherwise wouldn’t have given the time of day. It’s a sleazy pick-up artist tactic. It’s negging. When you see an all-too-common post that’s like “bigger girls shouldn’t wear bikinis” and the response is him getting “owned” because a woman replied with pictures of herself looking beautiful, he’s not getting owned at all, he’s getting exactly the result he was hoping for. They’re basically saying “You sure showed me by sending me, a huge sexist creep, a picture of yourself in a bikini! PLEASE don’t send me nudes, I don’t know if I could take the humiliation!”

“YOU DON’T HAVE TO PROVE ANYTHING TO ANYONE” ^^^^^^^

your teeth are always wet

this is something i didn’t need to be reminded of

you chewing bones are moist and theres nothing you can do to stop it

i know we make fun of baby boomers n shit for not being able to relate to millennials but we really are fucking impenetrable human beings 

the person i reblogged this from tagged it as ‘nsfw’

waits patiently for 2015 upload

And now, we wait

why did the fray go off so hard in how to save a life?

So we could cry when they lose patients on doctor shows

Magic isn’t about wizards or spells. Magic is about taking pictures that look like they were photographed in Russia.

disney’s gonna release the live-action little mermaid movie and the director’s gonna do an interview for teenvogue where he says the crab sebastian is gay and everyone’s gonna laud it as the most woke moment of 2019 and a horde of 21-35 year old women on tumblr will draw human aus where he’s a young white redhead and he and king triton are fuckin’