It's Like You're Dissecting My Brain!

You got cum on your face you big disgrace

not what he said!!

We will we will fuck you

Fanfiction is cool because you get to learn what other people's parents taught them the hymen is like

I know that I had somewhat unusually comprehensive sex ed but it still surprises me every time I'm reminded that some people genuinely think that losing your virginity is a capri sun kind of situation.

every year around late may, without fail, this post starts getting notes again . and my little wet raw chicken breast of a brain gets puzzled. because i forget that summer is , in fact. a yearly event

post so nice had to reblog it twice and force it down everyone's throats

When I am president I will replace bluetooth .... with bluetick. Yes that's right, under my administration all wireless communication will be facilitated by an expert team of hound dogs. This will create jobs, and strengthen diplomatic ties with Australia

What is your position on houndstooth?

I just mowed my 88 year old papas lawn and when i came back inside he lifted my arm to reveal a bug that was attempting to hitchhike into the house. At which point he said "you will NEVER escape my garden." And flicked it back into the grass