Your friendly neighbour

Is the best part that he got doxxed? No.

Is the best part that he got tracked down by a local and beaten? No.

Arrested on state at federal charges, looking at up to 5 years and 50K? Nope.

The best part is the local city council's reaction.

For me,one time,a few days before navratri,I had a dream where I saw a statue of Ma Kali one night,the statue was bigger than a building,then when I woke up,I felt this sudden energy,like being hit with something very hard over every inch,but at the same time not.

Then,the night after,I saw a painting of MahaKali in my dream(the form with multiple heads)

So,after those dreams,I started feeling closer to Ma Kali,I started considering her as my mother.

Then,about a month later,I had a dream about Lord Vishnu,and he was kind of walking around my house. He looked animated but real at the same time. After that,I started feeling attached to Krishna as well.

Then,I came to know about Krishnakali,and that according to some sects of Shaktism,Krishna and Kali are the same. While I do not know about the worship of the combined form yet,sometimes I worship Krishna and sometimes Ma Kali. I feel more casual with Krishna,but Ma Kali is the one I really talk to when I feel helpless,because I consider Krishna more of a friend,and Ma Kali as my mother,but I feel the same amount of love for both

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There was this Meera (2009) series on NDTV Imagine (it doesnt exist anymore), years ago.

I was 7.

I cud understand Hindi just a little at that time.

I literally felt flutterings in my heart, everytime I saw that Krishna idol.

I asked my mom about it, and she told me about Mira.

As the series progressed, I slowly started to like the idea of having a "magical" husband. Someone who is always with you - who is always smiling, very handsome, very cute, yk all that.

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I had also encountered a lot of racist comments on my skin tone, (fyi, i am on the tanner side like my dad) and why i wasnt fair like my younger bro and mom. I had ppl calling me charcoal 🤣.

I had a bunch of people come up to me and say, that my curly hair looked like a bird's nest and straight hair was quite ideal. My mom tried her level best to make me ignore them. But it didnt work.

So i started to identify myself to Him - he had dark skin, curly hair, huge eyes and was very strong, magical, smart. And as someone who knew all the multiplication tables of all the numbers, unlike me who was super lazy to learn them. 😤

I started to get butterflies in my stomach, and developed a crush on Him everytime I saw his image.

I was 7, mind you.

As i grew up, I understood Him better, the way he is literally fem gaze yet the Purusha himself.

He has been the savior for many downtrodden women, and I wanted to be saved by Him.

I had found my Ishta - Narayana Vaasudeva.

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I mentally planned to kill myself after NOT attaining 90% in Grade 12 exams (I got 80%), I had always been so good at studies, but shit happens.

Ppl were mocking me and Mom's colleagues told me to kill myself.

Their kids cant even cross 50% of the total marks or even come close to my knowledge. I did a lot of interschool stuff and even got myself featured on the Gulf Daily News.

But people say things only when ppl at their lowest.

Just mental thoughts, coz my lazy ass wont even suicide but still.

I cried myself to sleep that day, and asked Him to take me back. Why shud someone like me, who got shame to her parents even be alive?

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I suddenly felt like I was rising from my bed, and been sucked thru a pipe. I encountered a white light that was hella blinding.

There I met a beautiful man, I dont remember His face, His hands were dark skinned, He wore a lot of jewellery, He had the sexiest voice and His lips were red, and He smiled at me, coz I cud see His lips curving.

He asked me if I really wanted to come back, and He held my hands.

His tone was scolding, semi bickering, semi flirty yet comforting.

I cudnt answer Him.

...

He told me I must live to make Him proud and I must live coz my family loves me a lot.

He asked the same question again, and I said "Yes - I want to live. I dont wanna come back", and He held my shoulders and gave me a hard push.

I wake up in cold sweat in my bed, trying to catch my breath.

Mom sleeping next to me, scolded me for making noise and sleep for gods sake. I smiled myself to sleep.

That month, i realized I had been admitted to my desired university based on my entrance exam performance and not grade 12 board exam marks.

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Throughout university, I realized I wasnt able to date or "connect deeply" with anyone or even stay close friends.

I realized I had fallen too deeply in love with Him, so much that I cudnt even think of another man, unless its Him - the Lion among men.

Guys approaching me or remotely showing interest in me, always did something misogynist - it felt like their tongue moved on its own, or wud drift away from me.

I realized my Ishta probably was OK with my way of seeing Him. He was probably consenting to me and needed something more intense.

I have kept my loving words and myself reserved for Him. No man ever deserves me.

Fast forward 7 years after THAT dream / NDE, I work in AI now.

And the folks who asked me to kill myself are still struggling to finish their bachelors degree.

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I still believe it was Him who held my hands in His that day.

And told me that my boring ass life has a true purpose.

Why have a Guru, when I have already have my Jagadguru?

It was Him, my Ishta, my Lover, my God.

To You Govinda, whom I offer my entire existence,

To You Madhava, whom I love to the Moon and Back,

Let my soul not forget You,

For may even Death not do us part.

Hi Madison, thank you so much for such a lovely question! I will let Krishna answer himself: