caffienated & sleep deprivated

Why do I do this to myself , all this nonsense 

Clearly, it’s nothing, but what do I call myself 

What do we call ourselves 

If there even is “we” ?

Awkward entanglement reeks of discomfort 

Hiding behind empty words and promises 

I’ve never belonged to anyone, not even myself 

And you, man of the world 

Well, I hardly know you 

Two letter word fills the void 

I wait for a letter back, but why? 

Everyday 

Without a doubt 

Rainboots skip-skipping

I am looking down at puddles

Surrounding my feet,

little rainbows of oil beneath

Grey chilly sky

Clouds way up high

Misty fog in the air

Puddles everywhere

Umbrella nowhere near

Raincoat I hold dear

When a car passes by

And splashes by

Mirky muddy water

Defeated I wander

Back home

If you're lost at sea, then ill command your boat to me again.

dont look too far, right where you are, thats where I am!

Im your man.

You sent me a text the other day 

I didn't know what to say 

Believe the excuses you made 

Pretend I didn't care, that I didn't feel played 

What is your issue, go cry in your tissue 

Lying, pretending that I didn't miss you

Crimson blood escaping from your stitches 

Go to your parties to talk to your bitches 

What am I doing, I should know better 

Holes in the arms of my favorite sweater 

Yet I stay up at night,

Thinking of Oregon, my eyes shut tight

Replaying images in my head 

Of things that haven't happened, things I haven't said 

Trees around us everywhere

Hiking with our messy hair

Waterfalls and hot coffee 

Endless roads that won't stop me 

Wont stop us or anyone 

Staying out, wait for the sun- 

To rise upon the morning sky 

Oh hey there! 

You, with the hazel stare 

Messy long brown hair 

Dimples I can't bear- 

-To look at, when you’re near 

All the bad thoughts disappear 

Blood flows heavy to my ears 

Ideas in my head so clear, 

Of us together on a pier, 

Where is this ship taking us? we can’t steer 

We then glance back to the shore 

Stories we’ve never heard before 

Make their ways out our mouths  

Into our ears, the boat goes south 

We laugh until our ribs get sore 

Gasping for air, wanting more 

The land fades to a tiny speck 

Drifting off to sea, we’re not done yet 

Waves washing over us 

Blue and true 

im really tempted to text you, but i don't want to feel embarrassed again...