Ā Ā Ā Ā infinite celestial power and we canāt catch a bus! / est. april 2016
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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

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Ā Ā Ā Ā infinite celestial power and we canāt catch a bus! / est. april 2016

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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incxndia.
Ā Ā Ā ā Ā Ā please, you know me. i donāt mind. itās not like i grew up on the upper east side eating with a silver spoon.Ā Ā ā Ā Ā
ā Ā you still didnāt have live chickensĀ for income.Ā
( Ā she straightens out a pile of papers and sets them back down on her desk. her movements are a bit erratic , a bit shaky. sheās overwhelmed, to say the least. Ā )
ā Ā i donāt think i can go for drinks tonight, everything is just so fucking crazy. i feel like my headās gonna explode at any minute.Ā
Send one for a kiss from my muse.
š a kiss on the lips
āŖļø a kiss on the cheek
š· a kiss on the eyelid
ā¬ļø a kiss on the hand
ā«ļø a kiss on the forehead
ā¦ļø a kiss on the ear
š a kiss on a bruise/wound/etc.
ć° a kiss on the chest
š a kiss on the leg
š¶ a kiss on the neck
š» a kiss on the nose
texts from last night! meme
[text] Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today? [text] The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here [text] He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after. [text] I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW [text] So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this oneās for Team USA. [text] He gave me the āfind somebody who wants to date you for who you areā speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants. [text] I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese [text] I just got high off one hit and then Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refrigerator and researching ways to replace it [text] Seriously. Iām like, āWait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because youāre so fucking intelligent Iām turned on?ā [text] Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet? [text] He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. Iām keeping him. [text]Ā Iām making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life. [text] Itās a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later. [text] Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. Iāve been waiting for this moment forever. [text] Lesson learned. Donāt roleplay with a real knife. [text] We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old womanās birthday party for the food. Whoops. [text] He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle. [text] I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. Iād say it was a pretty successful Thursday night. [text] Iām wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real. [text] Heās like⦠An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. Itās almost unsettling [text] I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think Iāve found the One. [text] Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while⦠if you happen to find your balls then join us [text] i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled ādibs!ā⦠[text] and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered āSimbaā [text] so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog. [text] Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever. [text] Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me [text] We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sounds logical. Thank you daylight savings. [text] when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was āchug-a-lugā [text] Thereās a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork. [text] Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine [text] My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there. [text] He told me he loved me. I didnāt know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him [text] Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten [text] Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly. [text] He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter. [text] we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex Iāve ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury [text] I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a manās heart. [text] When was the last time you wore pants? [text] Iāve replaced you with thin mints and masturbation [text] Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast. [text] Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time [text] Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent [text] We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person. [text] I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So howās your day going? [text] I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesnāt need it today. [text] We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. Whatās wrong with this tradition? [text] all iāve had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila. [text] Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys donāt exist? [text] Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special [text] And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention [text] This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the āHigh While Analyzing Disney Moviesā texts begin. [text] Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He wonāt quit poking me on fb [text] I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes [text] One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it wonāt be me. Iām drinking liquor out of a fishbowl. [text] You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy [text] im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster [text] just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing. [text] I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on [text] Letās play a little game called āChill the Fuck Outā - youāre our first contestant [text] Didnāt get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie. [text] I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion. [text] you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat [text] tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance? [text] We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out [text] maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game [text] i think its awesome that according to your mom iām your friend that caught on fire. [text] So fucked up. Canāt tell if Iām starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out. [text] I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day. [text] Vodka is such a love hate relationship. [text] you traded sex for a burrito? [text] I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos. [text] You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there. [text] itās not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher. [text] Youāre always adorable, but when youāre drunk, youāre like Chia Pet adorable. [text] this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest [text] I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box [text] I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year oldās Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day. [text] Itās like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal itās gummy bears and instead of milk itās vodka. [text] You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go [text] Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome. [text] we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying āi mean who doesnāt like cheetosā [text] quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you [text] I left a cheeto on everyoneās car trailing to the house iām at, hanzel and gretel style. [text] Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again. [text] nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs [text] When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar. [text] kinda considering buying a life alert for sophomore year [text] My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something. [text] Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex. [text] you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing āfollow the yellowbrick roadā. iām pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted [text] Itās like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job. [text] did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes? [text] The world would be so much better with thought bubbles. [text] I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy! [text] You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen. [text] I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter. [text] So I woke up today with someoneās door knob in my pocket. I hope everybody else got out of the house ok. [text] So we successfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know. [text] Because when I say 'You shouldnāt drink anymoreā, she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinksā [text] okay, this game isnāt funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are. [text] The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing. [text] when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed [text] so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat. [text] You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone [text] never. drinking. again. [text] Iām gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see. [text] got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night [text] I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now [text] iām out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction. [text] Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
starter call !

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oftwentyeight.
Ā Ā Ā ā Most days I am, yeah.Ā ā
ā Ā wow.Ā
( Ā excuse her , this is kinda a big deal. Ā )
ā Ā you - i remember you, yeah, you were involved with the whole shield disaster.Ā
( Ā her hand is extended towards the other. Ā )
ā Ā karen page. itās really nice to meet you.Ā
ā Ā you know what , matt , i reallyĀ donāt want to deal with this shit right now.Ā
frank x karen + tumblr text posts
" Wanna play Army? I lay down and you blow the hell outta me. " ft. crotchety ol wes
ā Ā iād ask how that works , but i really donāt wanna sound presumptuous.Ā

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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at itās worst , you are numb. drained.
send my muse a pick up line
Weāre going to dance to one song, then go back to my apartment and fuck.
You might be asked to leave soon. You are making the other women look bad.
What do I have to do to be your booty call?
What has 36 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My zipper.
With my IQ and your body, we could make a race of superchildren!
When Iām older, Iāll look back at all of my crowning memories, and Iāll think of the day my children were born, the day I got married, and the day that I met you.
That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor tomorrow morning.
Since weāve been told to reduce waste these days, what you say we use these condoms in my pocket before they expire.
Your ass is so nice that it is a shame that you have to sit on it.
Were do you hide your wings?
Sit on my lap and weāll get things straight between us.
Sit on my face and let me get to ānoseā you better?
You know what material this is? [Grab your shirt] Boyfriend material.
There are 265 bones in the human body. How would you like one more?
Your shirt has to go, but you can stay.
Hey, tie your shoes! I donāt want you falling for anyone else.
Wanna play midget boxing? You get down on your knees and give me a couple blows!
Your place or mine? Tell you what? Iāll flip a coin. Head at my place, tail at yours.
Would you like Gin and platonic, or do you prefer Scotch and sofa?
So, what are the chances of my balls slappinā your ass tonight?
Weāll probably never see each other again, so letās screw.
Wanna play ākiteā? I lay down, you blow and weāll see how high you can make me.
Will you be my girlfrien? I left out the ādā cause youāll get that later!
Which is easier? You getting into those tight pants or getting you out of them?
The FBI wants to steal my penis. Can I hide it inside you?
So, what are the chances that we can engage in anything more than just conversation?
You make me wish I werenāt gay!
Writes on a napkin: āSmile if you want to have sex with me.ā
The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fuck you on the floor.
Wanna play Army? I lay down and you blow the hell outta me.
What is your favorite color? [Color] Mine too! Seems like we are soulmates.
Will you marry me for just one night?
Wanna play carnival? You sit on my face and I guess how much you weigh.
The only thing I want between our relationship is latex.
What are you doing tonight beside me?
Wanna fuck like bunnies?
Try me once and if you donāt like it, what have you wasted?
What, six hours of your life? Itād be more if you want foreplay.
You know the more I drink, the prettier you get!
You look like trash, may I take you out?
unhingedassassin.
Ā Ā Ā COULD Ā HAVEĀ thought about the question seriously, but the absurdity of it makes him make a sound Ā ( Ā akin to laughter ! Ā ) Ā before thinking twice about it. he shakes his head, unable to come up with an answer good enough. Ā ā Ā yeah. as good as iāll ever get. Ā ā Ā Ā a pause. Ā Ā ā Ā yāknow. i should be the one askinā that. Ā ā
ā Ā yeah , well.Ā
( Ā she sighs , attention turning to the table rather than to him. these diner conversations have become natural. she guesses itās easier to speak privately somewhere so public. Ā Ā )
ā Ā i worry about you , stupid as it sounds.Ā
serpentcm.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā matt ? he couldnāt recall having been even acquainted with a matt within the last century. ā sorry ? itās, er, anthony. anthony crowley. ā
ā Ā sorry. iām sorry -- you just look a lot like my friend.Ā
( Ā a pause. she looks him over once more. Ā )
ā Ā can i help you with something?
ā Ā youāre -- youāre one of the avengers.Ā

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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ā Ā you good ?Ā
starter call !