๐๐โNo one can live on their own. Go together, with others. If you do, 100 miles will feel like ten."
Like many of you out there, I just finished watching When Life Gives You Tangerines, and also like many of you, this story touched places in my heart and soul that I did not know existed.
I canโt say I have ever felt such a jarring mix of joy and pain all at once in my life. And while highly dramatic, I cannot phrase it any other way than my soul has been moved.
Because I see my family in this storyโฆ
๐this story is for my mother, who too lost her mother and father when she was young. Whose heart is always so tender and unconditionally loving. Who worries, nags, cries, and yearns for the best for her family. Whose love and wisdom is often brushed off and seemingly overbearing to her loved ones. For my mom whoโs life was riddled with fear, unhappiness, worry and death, but always chose kindness and understanding. For my mom who had dreams bigger than life, and as they were at the tips of her finger, sacrificed them because her family became her new dream. For my mom, whose sole purpose in life is to love her family better than she did the day before. For my mom who is just a girl living life for the first time like the rest of us, and yet echos wisdom that will affect and ripple across hundreds of lives for generations to come.
๐this story is for my father whose quiet and stoic nature often leaves him misunderstood and walking in the shadow of my motherโs brightness. For the father who suffers the punches and waves of life silence. For my dad whoโs lost his job twice throughout my life, and yet always kept a roof over our head and food on the table, and never let us feel the weight of the world coming down on us. For my father who, for a long time, i resented because it felt like he was shutting himself away within a fortress, leaving us trying to get in. But now realize was never locking us out but actually sheltering and protecting us within the fortress of his love. Standing with his back to the harsh world so that we might not have to face it completely alone. Loving us in his own quiet way that often goes unappreciated.
๐This story is for the middle child โ my big sister โ who seems to draw the short stick in life quite often. Who feels forgotten and like a last priority. Who desires to be loved as much as they love others โ and often times, are the ones who love so much greater than the rest. Who too toils and sacrifices for their dreams and independence since no one supported or dreamed with them. Who desperately wants to fit in with their family but can only see independence as a means of earning their love, respect and attention. Who chase and give all that they can because it feels that love is earned rather than freely given. For my sister who yells, screams and raises hell to get her point across; but who will walk through hell with you on her back without asking further questions. For my sister and all those children who need to remember that they were never forgotten, but loved in steadier and silent ways.
๐This story is for the sons โ my brother โ who are expected the most from, and are loved the quietest. Who are often expected to sacrifice, follow and lead without question or concern, and yet do not know the same gentle and tender care that their sisters receives. Who often do not know the soft love of their fathers, and yet are expected to love with a gentle spirit. Who feel awkward and uncomfortable moving through life as they try to become like their fathers, but simply desire the approval and love of their mothers. For my brother who has sacrificed big and small things as the eldest child for the sake of teaching not only his younger sisters, but his parents, on how to walk through life together.
๐This story is for the โgoldenโ children. Who dreamed so big but never truly accounted for the burden of expectations until they were faced with what comes with their prayers. Who will always feel less than deserving of the sacrifices of others. For the children who do not know how to separate gratitude from their guilt. Who cannot reconcile the idea of their parents and family giving up their dreams just for them to reach their own. Who simply wish to repay the priceless support from their family. For the child who feels guilty reaching higher heights because they canโt help but look back at the smiling faces of their family who lovingly offered you their backs to step on to go higher. For the child who will appraise get indebted no matter how much they give. Who silent eventually themselves that oneโs success is not usually the product of only oneโs personal effort but of those who unconditionally loved and supported them.
๐This story is for the grandparents who loved and raised our parents. That, even in their imperfection, wanted more for their family. For my grandmothers in heaven and my mother here, I can only think that they are smiling with joy when they see the goodness of their children, and I hope they know that that good is a reflection of their goodness that they showed to them.
๐This story is for the familyโs who burden and struggle together. For the parents who lost a child too soon, and the children who lost their parent too early. For the guilty and repentant parents. For the children who resent and love their family all at once. For those who wish to be just like their parents and those who desire to change their familyโs destiny. For the familyโs who fight for each other and commit to one another no matter the challenges ahead. Who choose loyalty, love, patience, humility and understanding over themselves. For the familyโs who trust that with time, all wounds will heal, even if there is a scar.
We do not get to choose the families we are born into, but we do get to choose the one we create. And this story is not just a story, but also call. A challenge that in the midst of life and our own imperfections and challenges, we can choose to be better for those we love. That resilience and joy are products of intentionality and not simply our circumstances.
๐๐We must bide our time in this life wisely and decide what truly matters. There is no such things as a perfect love, but that we can strive to love perfectly. ๐๐
A/N: sorry guys, I truly am no writer by any means, but I canโt help but pour my heart into this. ๐ฅฒ๐ซถ๐๐
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Explain to me how Iโm watching a reel of a guy struggling to keep him and his dog alive (btw they live out of his car cause) but still is trying to remain positive,
And then the next reel is of an ig model trying to influence me to buy the canon g7x as she prances around in a couture gown
Hmmm OK thatโs enough social media cause what do you mean sheโs probably making 10k+ just from this reel while this guy is working himself to the bone as an uber driver for him and his dog to just live????
The train arrived two minutes late, whichโon a normal dayโwouldโve annoyed you.
But today wasnโt normal. Today, the sky looked washed out, the kind of gray that reminded you of pencil sketches on newsprint. You werenโt running late. You werenโt even supposed to be on this train. But something about waking up before your alarm felt like permission to do somethingโฆ unordinary.
You bought your usual drink, jasmine tea with honey, and sat on your usual bench, only two seats from the back, near the window. The seat that let you half-watch the world outside and half-watch the people within.
Thatโs when you saw him.
He was already sitting across from you when you boarded. Black hoodie, white headphones slung around his neck, and a sketchpad balanced on his lap like it belonged there.
You werenโt someone who paid attention to strangers. But something about him made you look twice.
Maybe it was the way his hands movedโquick and careful, like he was trying to draw something before it disappeared.
Maybe it was the way heโd glance out the window every few minutes, as if measuring the world in glimpses.
Or maybe it was just the fact that he was drawing a dogโs paw.
No. Not just any paw.
It was your dog. Your childhood dog. The little scar on the pad, the uneven clawโhe was drawing Miso, your old retriever who passed away four years ago.
You didnโt even realize you were staring until he looked up.
His eyes locked with yours, and for a split second, you felt like you knew him. Not in a dรฉjร vu way. Not in a crush way.
But in a longing way.
He blinked slowly. โSorry,โ he said, holding up the sketchbook. โDidnโt mean to make you uncomfortable.โ
You pointed at the sketch. โWhere did you see that dog?โ
A small smile played at the corner of his mouth. It was a soft kind of smile. The kind you give to someone before saying goodbye.
โI didnโt,โ he replied. โI think I just remembered her.โ
You stared.
Then laughed, dryly. โThatโsโฆ weird.โ
He shrugged. โYeah. I guess so.โ
The train lurched slightly, the way it always did when nearing the next station. The voice on the speaker crackled, announcing the upcoming stop. You almost forgot where you were going.
He began packing up, tucking the sketchbook into a worn leather bag. As he stood, he paused and looked back at you.
โIโll see you again,โ he said, not quite as a question.
You raised a brow. โDo you come here often?โ
โNo,โ he said, stepping out into the crowd.
โBut you will.โ
And just like that, he disappeared into the blur of commuters and gray umbrellas.
You didnโt expect to see him again.
Maybe that was the strangest partโnot just that he vanished after saying heโd see you, but how you kept thinking about it long after.
Long after the train, long after the noise of the day caught up with you, long after you shouldโve forgotten about a boy with soft eyes and charcoal on his fingers.
But you didnโt forget.
You remembered the way he said it. Not like a hopeful guess. Like a quiet promise.
You didnโt even know his name.
A week passed.
It was raining again. The kind that misted your glasses and clung to your sleeves. You ducked into your favorite bookstore just to escape the wet, and becauseโif you were being honestโyou were starting to look for him in the corners of ordinary places.
It was dumb. You knew that.
Still, you walked the same aisles. Still, you let your fingers brush the same spines of books youโd already read. Still, you sat near the poetry section, sipping your too-hot tea, heart unsure of what it was even waiting for.
And then he walked in.
No umbrella. Hoodie pulled up. A little soaked, but there he wasโJeongguk, charcoal-boy, strange-train-stranger.
He didnโt look surprised to see you. Not even a little.
โYouโre late,โ he said, stepping into your aisle.
Your eyebrows shot up. โExcuse me?โ
He smiled. โYou usually come in an hour earlier.โ
โโฆHow would you know that?โ
โIโve seen you here before.โ
That made no sense. You had never seen him here. Not once. You were sure.
He wandered to the opposite shelf, trailing a finger along a row of books. His eyes skimmed titles like he already knew which one he wanted.
You watched him in silence, heart crawling up your throat.
Finally, you asked, โDo I know you?โ
He turned his head slowly, eyes unreadable.
โNot yet,โ he said softly. โBut I think you will.โ
You didnโt speak much that day.
He sat beside you on the bench near the window. He didnโt pull out his sketchpad. Didnโt offer any explanations. He just sat there, not even looking at youโjust out at the sky, where the clouds broke slightly and left streaks of gold.
It was quiet. But not awkward.
In fact, it felt like youโd sat like that before. Like muscle memory.
You noticed his pinky finger twitch, like he was fighting the urge to reach out. Like he remembered something you hadnโt lived yet.
โYou donโt talk much,โ you said.
โI do,โ he replied. โJust not right now.โ
You almost laughed. Almost.
โWhy?โ
He tilted his head, thinking.
โBecause if I say too much, I might break the moment.โ
There was something sad about the way he said it.
Not dramatic sadness. Justโฆ the kind you carry because itโs always been there.
When he left, he didnโt say goodbye.
He just stood slowly, glanced at you like he was memorizing something, and said:
โI hope next time, you still like me.โ
Then he walked away again.
And for the second time, you sat there with a cooling drink and a thousand unspoken questions.
But this time, you whispered one aloud:
โNext time?โ
You tried not to expect him.
That was the rule now, the quiet vow you made with yourself: Donโt expect the boy with the sketchpad. Donโt wait. Donโt wonder. Donโt walk into a bookstore or board a train hoping the universe would fold itself into the shape of him.
And still, somehow, you broke it.
You found yourself walking the long way home again. Past the market. Past the station. Past the window of the cafรฉ you never liked, just in case he was there, warming his fingers on a cup of tea you could pretend was also jasmine with honey.
It was stupid, wasnโt it? Missing someone you didnโt really know.
Wanting someone who left every conversation with a mystery and a look that felt like goodbye.
You wanted to hate the ache of it.
But instead, you started to carry it like a secret.
It had been twelve days since you last saw him.
You counted, though you told yourself not to.
You started keeping a journal again. You hadnโt done that since high school. But something about him made you want to capture timeโtrap it in words before it left you like he always did.
You wrote small things.
Day 6: I walked past the dog park. Saw a retriever with the same eyes as Miso. I cried a little and told myself it was allergies.
Day 9: I started drawing. Iโm not good. But I drew a pair of hands. I think they were his.
And then came Day 13.
It was raining again. You had no plans. So you found yourself returning to the quiet gallery near the edge of the university district. The one with free entry and too much space between the walls.
You liked it because no one ever talked there.
The room smelled like varnish and old dreams. You wandered slowly, reading plaques, half-looking, half-thinking. Your mind somewhere else.
You turned a cornerโand stopped.
There, on the wall, framed and pinned like a memory, was a charcoal drawing of you.
Not a perfect likeness. It wasnโt a portrait. But it was you. Your profile. Your jacket. Your fingers holding a tea cup. The same way you looked that first morning on the train.
And in the corner, like a whisper, was his name.
Jeon Jeongguk.
You didnโt realize someone had stepped behind you until a soft voice said, โI didnโt think youโd find it.โ
You turned slowly.
There he was. Hood down, eyes gentler than you remembered. No sketchpad this time. Just him.
You didnโt know what to say. So you stared at the drawing again. Then at him.
โThatโsโฆ me.โ
He nodded. โYeah.โ
โWhy?โ
Jeongguk looked at the wall like he was trying to explain something too big for words.
Then he looked at you.
โYou looked like you were living in a memory,โ he said quietly. โI just wanted to keep it.โ
You swallowed.
โThatโs not a normal thing to say to someone.โ
โI know.โ
You looked at him again. His eyes were tired in a way that didnโt match his age. Like heโd lived too many versions of a single goodbye.
โDo you do this a lot?โ you asked. โDraw strangers?โ
He shook his head. โNo. Just you.โ
You tried to laugh it off. โYouโre weird, you know.โ
โI know,โ he said again.
But he smiled.
You ended up walking together after that. Slowly. No destination.
There was a rhythm to being near him. Not comfortable, exactlyโbut familiar.
You noticed how he walked half a step behind you, like he was following your lead, like he was afraid of walking beside you too soon.
He didnโt ask questions. Didnโt pry. But when you spoke, he listened like every word mattered.
At one point, you stopped to buy two fish-shaped pastries from a street stall. You handed him one.
โI like red bean,โ you said. โHope thatโs okay.โ
He looked surprised. โThatโsโฆ always been your favorite.โ
You paused. โHow do you know that?โ
His expression flickered.
โI donโt know,โ he said softly. โIt just feels true.โ
That night, as you stood at the train crossing together, watching the lights blink red, he turned to you.
โCan I ask something?โ he said.
You nodded.
โDo you believe in things happening out of order?โ
You thought for a moment. โLike fate?โ
He shook his head. โNot fate. Justโฆ time. Moments. Meeting someone when youโre not supposed to. Remembering things before they happen.โ
You gave a small, uncertain smile. โIs that whatโs happening?โ
He didnโt answer right away.
Instead, he whispered, โI think Iโm remembering you from the end, while youโre still at the beginning.โ
You stood there, breath caught in your throat, not knowing how to respond.
Because somehowโฆ that didnโt sound crazy at all.
It sounded like the truth.
The first time you dreamt of him, he was crying.
It was quiet. He sat on a rooftop somewhere, knees drawn to his chest, and the wind moved gently through his hair.
He cried the way people do when they know something is ending.
Not with panic. With surrender.
And when he turned, he said your name like it was the last time.
You woke up with your heart beating wrong. Like it had skipped a few steps and landed in someone elseโs story.
You didnโt see him for days.
But the dream stayed. It stayed in your bones, in your throat, in the stillness between tasks. You thought about his voice saying your nameโhow heโd never actually said it in real life. How, somehow, your subconscious gave him the exact tone you thought it might have.
You found yourself looking for him again. Not frantically. But like a habit.
You walked the bookstore path. The gallery path. The bench in the train car, third from the back, near the window.
He wasnโt there.
Instead, you sat alone and tried to draw the rooftop from your dream.
The view, the shape of his shoulders, the way the sky looked bruised behind him.
You didnโt even realize someone had approached until a shadow passed over your sketchbook.
โThatโs a nice shade for grief,โ said a voice.
You didnโt need to look. You knew it was him.
You looked anyway.
Jeongguk sat down beside you like it was his seat too. As if time had folded again and he just stepped back into your rhythm.
You waited for the awkwardness that shouldโve come.
But it didnโt.
You just said, โI saw you.โ
He blinked. โWhen?โ
โIn a dream. You were on a rooftop.โ
He stilled, eyes unreadable. โDid I say anything?โ
You hesitated. Then lied: โNo. You just lookedโฆ tired.โ
He looked down at your sketch. Then at his hands.
โI think you remember more than you think.โ
You wanted to ask what that meant.
But part of you was scaredโscared to name the strange dance youโd been pulled into. Scared it would stop if you looked too closely.
Instead, you changed the subject.
โDo you live nearby?โ
He smiled faintly. โNot really.โ
โYou just wander around the places I happen to be?โ
โI told you. Iโll always see you again.โ
โYou say that like youโre sure.โ
โI am.โ
There it was againโthat quiet certainty. That knowing.
You didnโt understand it. But you were starting to trust it.
That afternoon, he asked if you wanted to see something.
You followed him down old streets with hanging vines and crooked fences. He led you into an old train station that had been turned into a community art space. He didnโt say much. Just walked past the louder displays until you reached a room tucked in the back.
He pushed open the door. Inside: a small room filled with sketches.
You stared. Not just at the art, but at what it meant.
โThese areโโ
โMoments,โ he said quietly. โTiny things I didnโt want to forget.โ
You turned to him, voice thin. โAll of these are me?โ
โNo,โ he said, shaking his head gently. โNot yet. Some are versions of you I havenโt met yet.โ
You felt dizzy. Like the floor had shifted just slightly.
โWhy are you showing me this?โ
He finally looked at youโreally looked.
And in that moment, you saw it. The ache beneath the certainty. The way he held your gaze like it was already breaking his heart.
โBecause someday,โ he whispered, โyouโll forget me.โ
That night, you didnโt sleep.
You sat by your window, journal in your lap, and wrote down every time heโd appeared. Every strange thing heโd said. Every little impossible truth.
You didnโt have the answers.
But you were starting to understand the shape of the question.
And it terrified you in the most beautiful way.
The next time you saw him, he didnโt smile.
It was duskโyour favorite hour. That in-between stretch of time where everything feels dipped in nostalgia for something not quite gone. You werenโt looking for him. Not this time. You were walking the long way home again, headphones in, humming a song you didnโt remember learning.
And then, just before the crossing, there he was.
Leaning against the railing like heโd been waiting.
He didnโt wave. He didnโt greet you with a line dipped in mystery or tenderness. He just looked at you like he was afraid to speak.
โHey,โ you said first.
โHey.โ
A pause.
Then he asked, almost nervously, โCan I walk with you?โ
You nodded.
The two of you walked in silence.
It was easy now, the quiet. You didnโt need to fill it. There was something sacred about itโlike you were both protecting the same fragile thing without naming it.
You watched the way he moved. How he always kept one hand curled slightly, like it had held yours once, and still remembered the shape.
You didnโt know why, but your chest ached.
When you reached the familiar bench by the corner bookstoreโthe one with the chipped blue paint and fallen ginkgo leavesโhe stopped walking.
โThis was the first place I said I loved you,โ he said quietly.
You blinked. โWhat?โ
Jeongguk didnโt look at you. His eyes were on the bench like it was a grave. Or an altar.
โIโm not supposed to tell you,โ he continued. โIt messes things up when I do.โ
Your breath caught. โJeonggukโโ
โI know,โ he said, holding up his hand. โIt doesnโt make sense. Not yet.โ
You stepped closer, heart hammering. โAre you saying weโve done this before?โ
He looked at you then.
And it wasnโt the look of a boy flirting with possibility. It was the look of a man grieving a memory he was losing day by day.
โNo,โ he whispered.
โYouโve never done this before. But I have.โ
You didnโt speak.
Not for a long while.
He sat down on the bench, shoulders slumped, and you followed, slowly, sitting beside him like gravity demanded it.
โYouโre not from the future, are you?โ you asked, voice small.
He let out a breathโhalf laugh, half sigh.
โNo. Iโm justโฆ on a different clock.โ
You turned to face him, eyes wide, searching. โWhat does that mean?โ
Jeongguk hesitated.
Then he looked at you like this might be the last time.
โI live backwards,โ he said. โMy past is your future.โ
You stared.
โNo,โ you said, too fast, too sharp. โThatโsโwhat does that even mean?โ
โIt means,โ he said gently, โthat the first time I met you, you already loved me. But from your sideโฆ it hadnโt even started.โ
The silence that followed was cruel.
You sat frozen, trying to wrap your mind around it.
A love story in reverse.
Heโd already seen the version of you that knew his middle name, his favorite movie, how he liked his coffee. Heโd already watched you fall in love, and fall asleep in his arms, and cry into his hoodie on a rooftop.
He knew all the versions of you that you hadnโt met yet.
But every time you saw himโฆ he was closer to forgetting.
โI donโt want this,โ you whispered, unsure if you meant him, or the truth.
โI didnโt either,โ he replied. โBut I didnโt have a choice. I fell into you without knowing where it would end. And by the time I realized it was your beginningโI was already at my end.โ
You felt the tears before they came. Silent, but inevitable. The kind you didnโt sob. The kind you just let fall.
Jeongguk didnโt touch you. He didnโt wipe them away.
Instead, he just said:
โSomeday, youโll fall in love with me.โ
And with that, he stood.
Before you could say anything, he addedโ
โAnd the cruel part isโฆ youโll think itโs the first time. But for me, itโll be the last.โ
Then he walked away.
And all you could do was sit on the bench where love would eventually be spoken, aching over a goodbye you hadnโt even said yet.
The human mind wasnโt built for thisโ
For remembering things it never lived.
For aching over touches it never felt.
For grieving someone who hasnโt left you yet.
But your body remembered him.
In tiny ways.
Like how you almost said โbless youโ the moment before he sneezed in the middle of a bookstore, even though you hadnโt even looked up yet.
Or how, during a rainstorm, your hands made tea for two without thinking. Right before your phone buzzed with his name.
You hadnโt saved his number.
You hadnโt even given him yours.
That night, you dreamed again.
But this time, you werenโt watching.
You were in it.
You were curled up on someoneโs couch, in a dim apartment with windows that faced the Han River. A sweatshirt too big for you hung off one shoulder. Someoneโhimโwas cooking something in the kitchen. It smelled like garlic and rain.
And thenโlike it had happened a thousand times beforeโyou walked barefoot to him and wrapped your arms around his waist from behind.
He turned his head slightly and kissed the crown of yours.
โWhy are you sad tonight?โ he asked softly.
You whispered, โBecause I know this ends.โ
He didnโt argue. He just said: โNot for me. Iโm already in the middle of it.โ
You woke up with tears in your hairline. The kind you cry in your sleep and donโt remember starting.
You didnโt tell anyone.
How could you?
How do you tell someone:
I think Iโm remembering someone elseโs heartbreakโฆ but it belongs to me.
You didnโt see Jeongguk again for five days.
Not that you werenโt looking.
You just didnโt know where to look anymore. Or if you should.
Instead, you filled your days with things that used to feel like yours.
Books. Cafรฉs. Sketches. Long walks.
But they all felt thinner now. Like rooms missing furniture. Like mornings missing him.
You told yourself it wasnโt love. That was ridiculous.
You didnโt know him.
But your soul disagreed.
Then, on day seven, he came back.
He was waiting outside the gallery. Not in front. In the alley behind itโhalf-hidden, half-watching. He didnโt look surprised when you found him. Just sad.
โI thought maybe you wouldnโt come,โ he said.
โI didnโt know I was coming either.โ
He nodded, as if he already knew.
You looked at him then. His eyes were tired again. That same quiet exhaustion youโd seen in the first dream. But this time, he had something folded in his hand. A photo.
He handed it to you.
It was worn, edges curled. A photograph of you. You were laughingโlaughing so hard your head was thrown back, your teeth showing, your hands clutching your stomach. And beside youโฆ him. Eyes crinkled. Grinning like the world was ending and he didnโt mind.
You swallowed.
โIโve neverโthis photoโโ
โYou will,โ he whispered.
You blinked up at him. โWhy are you showing this to me now?โ
Jeongguk looked at you like it hurt.
โBecause Iโm starting to forget.โ
Your heart cracked.
โI donโt want to forget the sound of your laugh. So I needed to give something back.โ
You didnโt speak for a while after that.
You just stood in that little alleyway, the city humming in the background, and stared at a memory you hadnโt made yet.
And when he finally stepped closer and tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear, you didnโt flinch.
You didnโt pull away.
Because somehow, even that touch felt like a habit.
Before he left, you asked quietly:
โIs there a version of us where we got it right?โ
He hesitated.
Then said the softest thing youโve ever heard:
โEvery version of us felt right to me.โ
Then he turned and disappeared around the cornerโlike a memory being tucked away.
And you were left with a photo you didnโt remember taking, and a heart full of someone you were still about to meet.
Thereโs a particular kind of longing that has no name.
Not quite missing.
Not quite desire.
But a gravity that pulls you toward something youโve never touched, yet ache for anyway.
Thatโs what it felt like.
Living with the memory of a boy you hadnโt yet loved.
You started noticing the way time bent around him.
How he never asked questions he shouldnโt already know.
How he never said โmaybe.โ
Only โyou will.โ
Only โwe did.โ
And you began to crave something strangeโ
Evidence.
Proof that you werenโt going mad.
Proof that time really was folding around the two of you.
You went to the river that weekend.
The Han was quiet under gray skies, scattered with couples and joggers. You wore a hoodie you didnโt recognizeโone that smelled faintly of rosemary and something familiar.
You didnโt know why youโd kept it in the back of your closet.
Didnโt know why you reached for it now.
Didnโt know why your fingers found the inside pocket and touched a crumpled movie stub.
The date was two weeks away.
Your heart stuttered.
You sat on a bench by the water and stared at the ticket, waiting for the world to shift. It didnโt. It justโฆ kept turning, quiet and indifferent.
Still, you stayed.
Like he might appear again, walking from the mist.
Or maybeโฆ fade into it.
You dreamt again that night.
Not a rooftop this time.
A tiny secondhand bookstore with hanging lights and an old cat asleep on the poetry shelf.
He was there, waiting, eyes glowing like heโd just seen you for the first time again.
โHey,โ he whispered in the dream. โYouโre earlier than last time.โ
You wanted to say, No, youโre just late.
But you didnโt. Because even in your dreams, you could feel it:
You were always catching up.
And he was always quietly saying goodbye.
The next morning, you returned to the city with one thing on your mind:
The bookstore.
You didnโt know if it was real.
But it felt real.
The cat. The low ceilings. The smell of dust and cardamom tea.
You walked street after street until your feet ached.
And then, tucked between a flower shop and a laundromat, you found it.
A brass bell jingled as you stepped in.
And thereโcurled like memory made fleshโwas a gray cat asleep on the poetry shelf.
Your knees nearly buckled.
You wandered through the aisles in a daze, fingertips tracing bindings, breath shallow.
And then, on a small table near the window, you saw a sketchbook.
Familiar.
Charcoal lines. Unfinished curves. And your profile againโsofter this time, like it had been drawn while you were sleeping.
A note was tucked underneath.
โI left this here in case you came looking.
And I always hoped you would.โ
โJ
You sat on the floor.
Right there, surrounded by poetry and dust, you let yourself cry. Not because you were sadโbut because something inside you knew this was a place you had once been loved.
You didnโt call him. You didnโt know how.
You didnโt run to find him either. Because something about love like thisโlove that defies timeโteaches you to wait with reverence.
So you walked home slowly, under a sky dusted in rose-gold.
And when you passed by your own reflection in a train window, you smiled softly.
Because you finally understood:
You were falling in love with him.
Not because of the memories.
But because of the quiet way he made room for you to become someone you hadnโt yet been.
Somewhere between meeting him and now,
you stopped trying to make sense of time.
It was like swimming in a lake youโd known in another life.
You stopped asking how deep it went.
You just sank, gentlyโwillinglyโinto the knowing.
You saw him again at the gallery.
This time, he wasnโt sketching.
He was standing in front of a wall,
gazing at a drawing that hadnโt been there before.
It was of two peopleโhands reaching, not quite touching.
The space between them held more ache than most entire love stories.
He didnโt turn when you walked up beside him.
Didnโt even flinch when you said, โIs this new?โ
He nodded. โIt was always going to be.โ
You looked at him.
He looked tired.
Like he was trying to memorize everything before it faded.
Like every second near you cost something.
โAre you okay?โ you asked.
He smiled without looking at you.
โIโm running out of todays.โ
You didnโt cry, even though your throat burned with the want to.
Instead, you stepped closerโso close you could feel the shape of his breath.
โI want to know,โ you said. โEverything.โ
He finally turned. His eyes were so full of you.
โI canโt give you everything,โ he whispered.
โOnly moments. Only pieces.โ
โThen give me pieces,โ you said. โEven if I break holding them.โ
So he did.
That night, you sat by the river againโsame bench, same distance, same hush between youโand he told you tiny truths in the dark.
โI knew the sound of your laugh before I heard it.โ
โYou fall asleep faster when your feet are cold.โ
โYou once told me you never wanted forever, just a love that felt like music. Quiet, then loud. Then quiet again.โ
You didnโt remember saying that.
But your body did. Your bones did.
Your heart beat like a drum under your skin.
And you let your hand rest beside hisโnot touching, not yet.
The next night, he didnโt come.
Nor the next.
Nor the one after that.
You tried not to worry.
But the silence around you started to ache.
The dreams became stronger.
Not memories anymoreโwarnings.
You saw yourself running. You saw the bench. The sketchbook.
You heard yourself saying things you hadnโt said yet.
You woke with his name on your lips and a fist clenched around your pillow,
like you were holding on to the idea of him.
Thenโon the fifth nightโhe came.
But not as you remembered.
He lookedโฆ lighter. Not in peace.
In fade.
His edges seemed blurred, like he was part of the air around you.
โJeongguk?โ you said, breathless.
โIโm forgetting,โ he whispered.
โEven now, looking at youโI know I loved you. But I canโt remember which memory it was.โ
Your throat closed up.
โI donโt want this to end.โ
โI know,โ he said, stepping closer.
โBut love doesnโt live in time.
It lives in us.
In the way youโll carry me even when Iโm gone.โ
You shook your head. โI donโt want memories. I want you.โ
And thenโ
He touched your face.
For the first time in real time.
In your time.
His hand was warm. Anchored. Real.
โYouโll love me,โ he said. โAnd I wonโt know it.
But Iโll still feel it.โ
Tears slipped down your cheek.
And for the first time,
he kissed you.
It was soft. Gentle.
A hello and a goodbye in one breath.
You didnโt want to let go.
But you had to.
Because the moment his lips left yoursโhe began to vanish.
Not like magic.
Like a photograph in water.
Like smoke from a birthday candle.
You didnโt scream.
You just whispered:
โThank you for finding me.โ
And he smiled through the blur,
his final words barely a hushโ
โI always will.โ
Then he was gone.
That night, you walked home with the world rearranged.
Not broken.
Not ruined.
Justโฆ quieter.
Because now, you werenโt afraid of the end.
Youโd touched something eternal.
And soonโvery soonโyouโd fall in love with him.
Even if he never remembered.
You stopped hoping.
Or maybe you just stopped expecting.
Time had dulled the sharp edge of waiting into something quieterโ
like the way the sea forgets the shape of a storm, but still remembers how to ache.
The world had moved on.
And so had you.
Or so you told yourself.
It was a Tuesday.
Ordinary. Uneventful.
The kind of day no one writes stories about.
You were seated on the train againโthird car from the back, by the window.
Same seat. Same view.
A routine you hadnโt broken, not once.
You looked up.
And there he was.
On the opposite train.
Same seat.
Facing you.
Still. Silent.
His face hadnโt changed.
But his eyesโฆ
his eyes knew something now.
The trains werenโt moving.
Just two carriages side by side, paused between moments.
You stared.
So did he.
Neither of you moved.
Neither of you smiled.
But in the space between glass and time,
you looked at each other like you knew.
Like your souls had lived this before.
Like you had loved, lost, and loved again.
Like every version of you had always been reaching for this one second.
The city blurred behind him.
Your reflection shimmered in the glass between you.
Breath held.
Heart breaking.
Not because you were meeting for the first timeโ
If people are always saying that we shouldnโt care about what other people thinkโฆ Then why do the other people bother to even think about those who donโt care..?
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Free to watch โข No registration required โข HD streaming
Your characters are allowed to be bad people. Your story is allowed to have no moral lesson.yyour ending is allowed to be sad. The villain can win. The good person can do something unforgivable. The lovers can destroy each other. You are allowed to write the thing that no one asked for and everything that everyone told you doesnโt work and you are allowed to not explain yourself.
The most interesting question you can ask about any character is not what do they want. it's what do they believe they deserve. because those two things are almost never the same and the gap between them is where your entire story lives. a person can want love completely and believe they don't deserve it and that belief will destroy every good thing that comes toward them in ways they won't even notice they're doing. write the gap. the gap is the character.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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time loop with two people in it but one person refuses to acknowledge the loop and pretends to be looping with everyone else. meanwhile the other person is freaking out
โI woke up extremely happy today. I only let sadness consume me for a day maximum. If God grants me life and I happen to wake up the next day, the last thing Iโm going to do is spend it worrying about yesterday. It is what it is but it wonโt affect my joy. Ever ๐ปโ
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
โ Live Streamingโ Interactive Chatโ Private Showsโ HD Qualityโ Free Actions
Free to watch โข No registration required โข HD streaming