Eden

So many women have internalized the idea that being difficult makes people think less of them, when in my experience the opposite is almost always true. Every single time I have spoken up, voiced what I actually need and refused to shrink the moment in order to be more comfortable for everyone else in the room, I have been approached afterward by people who wanted to know me better. There is no reward waiting for you on the other side of making yourself smaller. People do not love you more for taking up less space, they simply get used to you taking up less space and adjust their expectations accordingly. Every time I have been exactly as audacious as the moment required, it has opened doors rather than closed them and I have made real connections directly because of it rather than in spite of it.

Friends are supposed to water each other and help each other grow.

Life seems to be moving fast because you live a monotonous reality. You need to escape the trap of the mindless routine before it consumes you. The last thing you want is to blink and realize you’ve lived a good chunk of your life in ways that blended all days together with a complete loss of time. Your life needs excitement, activities, quests, challenges, novelty on a daily basis. Life is not happening in your bedroom, head, or you phone. It is happening outside. Go live it, now.

89

Always always always tell people you love they are so smart and capable. I will die on this hill. More often than not people are raised in unforgiving environments that tell them they are inherently “stupid” and not good enough for things, whether that be parents or cruel bosses or unsupportive friends. An underrated way of supporting people is reminding them they are brilliant no matter what anyone has ever said about their intellect and potential. People can do wonders when it’s affirmed to them their limiting beliefs are just that: limiting beliefs.

I hate to say it and I hate to know it but if you crave intimacy and deep relation you truly have to muster the courage to go first.

Something I forgot to mention here is that before even trying to rearrange what's happening 'out there' you muster the courage to go first within yourself. Everything you seek - give it first to yourself in sensation, in imagination. Don't be stingy with yourself. It doesn’t make sense to have a codependent relationship with reality or need appearances (how things appear from moment to moment) to validate you. This is fighting with shadows, that are ungraspable and bound to change. I think when you are approaching others from this false self/ego space that functions with the idea that 'you' are somewhat deficient, inferior, or lacking, you go within and address that. Your internal shifts are not happening in isolation - they're ripples in the same 'water' which everything is of