we revolutionary, peace loving people

the strongest urge to play guitar Right Now always presents in the half hour after painting my nails

I'm not nonbinary as in femme aligned I'm not nonbinary as in nb transmasc I'm not nonbinary as in "a bit of both" I'm nonbinary as in the gender binary is not something I identify with in any way. no aspect of binary gender is personally interesting or useful to me. I am literally just a person doing things as I please and any gender alignment you are able to project on my appearance or behavior is just that - a projection - and is not indicative of how I identify. I refuse to do gender presentation calculus to "look nonbinary" because I don't want to and it will never be sufficient to avoid being forcibly gendered in this deeply binarist society anyway. please please please stop subjecting me to yet another attempt to define and categorise nonbinary people that's just "the gender binary... 2!!" again.

last couple years I've been mostly interacting with established friends, meeting new people only through queer channels, avoiding the general public by not studying or working & on several occasions people expressed concern that I was walling myself off from the "real world" and would become unable to tolerate being around people who didn't already think like me & recently I've been involved in projects that have entailed working with a lot of older cishet people and getting misgendered a whole bunch and I can confidently say that spending time away from the drip-drip water torture of always being the odd one out has in fact allowed me to heal and become stronger and better at letting it run right off me. funny that.