Draco: Well, there’s nothing really to say except that I’m a bloody idiot.
Hermione: You’re one of the smartest people I know.
Draco: Well, I know everyone you know, Granger. The bar’s pretty low.


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Draco: Well, there’s nothing really to say except that I’m a bloody idiot.
Hermione: You’re one of the smartest people I know.
Draco: Well, I know everyone you know, Granger. The bar’s pretty low.

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Hermione: Wait, are you frightened of your own mother?
Draco: Of course! Isn’t everyone?
Hermione: Draco, you are smart and nice and perfectly normal.
Blaise: I don’t think he is all of those things.
Hermione: I have always found it helpful to vent when I’m feeling dissatisfied.
Draco: I don’t vent. I scream into a pillow.
Hermione: Ooh, an owl from my hot Slytherin lover.
Harry: You know, you don’t have to call Malfoy that every time you refer to him.
Hermione: Which one — hot or Slytherin? ’Cause he’s both.
Harry: Lover. It’s very 1978, and not in a good way.
Hermione: Well, I’m bringing it back.
Harry: Please don’t.

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Draco: [about Ron] Who gets bit by a spider? Was he, like, hanging out in a comic book?
after a fight
Hermione: What do you want me to say? You want me to say that everything’s OK now?
Draco: I mean, yeah, if that’s an option, I’d love that. Say that!
Draco: Hey, can I ask you a normal question?
Hermione: I don’t think so, but give it a shot.
Harry: [to Hermione] Don’t look at pretty Malfoy! He just wants to, like, lure you in with his pretty face, but he’s full of it!
Draco: Ambition is not a dirty word. It’s the best thing about me! [beat] That, and my hair.

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Hermione: Hey, you look like a million galleons.
Draco: That expression should really be adjusted for inflation, but thank you.
Draco: Hermione Malfoy. That’s got a nice ring to it, don’t you think? Will you hook that up for me?
Theo: No.
Draco: Why not? Unless, hey, I mean, do you like her?
Theo: No no no no. She’s argumentative, bossy.
Draco: Yeah, that’s my type.
Draco: So I’ve been thinking. I owe you an apology. Several actually.
[long pause]
Hermione: You have to actually say the words. That’s kinda how it works.
Draco: You’re very short.
Hermione: Excuse me?
Draco: I don’t mean it in a negative way. [Pauses] Maybe I do. I find little people to be untrustworthy.
Draco: What were we even fighting about all those years ago…?
Ron: Your compulsion for world domination and inability to accept rejection.
Draco: Ah. Translation: It was about Granger.

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Draco: [To Theo] Nott, there you are! I need some advice in an area I assume you have great expertise: What does it mean when a woman recoils at your touch?
Draco: Listen to me — a bunch of muggles with guns just shot up my office—
Hermione: You have an office?
Draco: That’s not the key takeaway from that sentence.