A place of sanctuary for my feelings.

Sister Julienne: I'm worried about Sister Monica Joan, she's barely eating and she keeps talking about her mother

Sister Monica Joan: I am undoubtedly dying!

random woman: I'm eight months pregnant and decades of family drama is coming to a head! Also my husband/mother/sister is ill.

*nuns singing montage*

*Fred pops up out of nowhere* Does anyone want a pork pie? I'm selling pork pies now.

Dr Turner, lighting a cigarette: I'm fine with gay people and I love vaccines

Timothy, smugly: if only they could invent a vaccine for homophobia.

Shelagh, rifling through medical paperwork: I think there's something wrong with random woman's husband/mother/sister. Please don't ask how I ever have time to raise my children.

*sixties pop music montage!*

*random woman gives birth, it's either a girl or a boy*

*family drama is resolved*

*random woman's husband/mother/sister dies/is cured*

*Trixie gets a new haircut*

Old Jenny: and that was how I came to deeper understand the fragility and beauty of life in the East End (she literally wasn't there)

Save your tears for something sad, because there’s nothing sad here. I have lived a privileged and an interesting life, and now it’s time to go. 

Narrator: In Autumn, all souls feel the rot but the rot allows flowers to grow and spring will come again. The war absolutely hollowed out communities but also there was jam. Nonnatus house had nuns in it but they were cool nuns. As the weather turned, those in need were ever more vulnerable and we did what we could.

Trixie: I cannot fix this with rouge, Matthew *perky hair toss*

Sister Monica Joan: Aristotle had heard of glaucoma, why won't anybody listen to me, also I've sat on the swiss roll.

Sister Julienne: Nonnatus house may be repossessed/ demolished/ infested with weevils. Our future is uncertain, but damnit the women of Poplar need us.

The Irish One: I love coloured tights but also I've done the autoclave

Harrowing music begins as we watch an unwed teen mother/ man addicted to meth/ victim of some sort of domestic horror/ woman with pre-ecclampsia

Nurse Crane: There you go lass

Harrowing storyline is briefly featured again but also there's a pregnant dog in Nonnatus House.

Dr Turner: Let's give her Pethidine, also I'm progressive about (insert topical issue here)

Sister Julienne: Nonnatus House is a metaphor for the morals of this country and that's why we're going to the dogs

Random Nurse: Actually sister Julienne I think we should teach teenagers about contraception

Sister Monica Joan: We simply must have compline now

Compline and the harrowing storyline (which has now reached its apex through either a harrowing birth scene or some other medical procedure) are now interspersed in a way that is troublingly close to saying suffering is fine actually because Jesus.

Sheelagh: Oh Patrick

The harrowing storyline is now resolved, often with some more voiceover that references the vagaries of the turning world

Trixie: Matthew, I have solved it. And I have put on rouge. I can have it all except a consistent haircut.

Fred: The dog's had puppies, and this will save Nonnatus house.

Bates and Anna, 43/? Downton Abbey S2E9