Wizard Fact #42: The real reason you're not supposed to stick a fork into your toaster is because you might stab one of the wizards in there
and they will instantaneously retaliate with a level 8 Chain Lightning, as is their right
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@eagles34
Wizard Fact #42: The real reason you're not supposed to stick a fork into your toaster is because you might stab one of the wizards in there
and they will instantaneously retaliate with a level 8 Chain Lightning, as is their right

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
I was walking through the toy aisle at Target when I found this thing and had a VIOLENT AND IMMEDIATE FLASHBACK to when JP first came out and they had a bunch of REALLY COOL T Rex toys that I would have sold one of my scrawny small-child limbs for but my mother wouldn’t get me one because they were “too violent and also ate people” :(
hnn I WANT IT SO BAD
on closer inspection, it makes a lot of really obnoxious noises and is also Too Expensive. BUT FEAR NOT I found this slightly smaller dude wedged in the back!
IT HAS BITE ACTION, AND THAT’S THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS
now we enter the testing phase
yup. looks good.
Extreme Chompin T-Rex says IT’S NEVER TOO LATE TO FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS
Can we take a moment to appreciate that we can use this as a rosetta stone to say “EXTREME CHOMPIN’ “ in four languages?
OH SHIT YOU’RE RIGHT, let me check the garbage to see if it’s still there! hopefully I didn’t destroy it in my excitement
*roar sound effect*
IMPORTANT UPDATE:
update update: I re-sized her collar and found a bag of toy bones at the craft store. I haven’t put this much effort into a non-school thing since my last job search, help
(secret bonus: the other side of her tag)
There’s more!
I love.
I saw that people are reblogging the thread again, so I thought I’d give you all an update on how Wexter is doing!
(just fine)
Wexter And The Case Of Her Continuing Marvelously Naughty Garden Adventures
Wexter says SHE WOULD NEVER DO SUCH A THING (but she might chew your ankles a little bit maybe)
so it’s come to my attention that at some point this weekend Wexter blew past 100,000 notes, and I for one think that’s very cash money of her.
it’s been a few weeks, I suppose we should check up on the AHSGSHGAFB?!
ajdhf.
well that’s just,,,
REXCELLENT
two hundred THOUSAND notes???!?!
HELL
YES
HELL
FUCKING
YES.
cry, probably
Reblogging to get you one note closer to crossing the 400k mark!
IT’S TIME
YOU MANIACS. okay, here we go!
HAIL TO THE QUEEN
LONG MAY SHE REIGN!
(she was a skater Rex, she said see you later Rex, she’s finally hit 400k!)
we’re coming to you live from Halloween 2022, where Wexter continues to be ridiculously jawsome!
this year we’re doing a much-beloved character from classic literature, “Dracula with inappropriate straw hat”
thanks everyone, may your weens be hollow and your candy be many!
hey! HEY. it’s Halloween 2023! AND YOU’LL NEVER GUESS WHAT WEXTER IS DRESSED UP AS THIS YEAR.
she’s… (WEXTER! here girl!) she’s a… a…..
she’s a T. Rex.
GOTTEM!
Andarna doesn’t want the lil bb dragons to feel left out, so she keeps them up to date on Xaden and Violet and all the drama in Fourth Wing.
I can totally see it
I saw the meme template and I just went, yes
We need to go back to using sailing ships full time like immediately. Yes it would take longer to get places but the Aesthetic is unmatched
Like there is nothing sexier hthan this
Can’t wait for OP to get scurvy
Are you under the impression that the ships themselves are what caused scurvy
Once again. Do you think this is the fault of the ships themselves

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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There's a special thing that happens in ZR when you run 500 miles.
So what if this happened when you ran 1000 miles? XDD
Thanks @runner5ive for making my idea even better <3
“Just because something isn’t meant to last a lifetime doesn’t mean it wasn’t meant to be.”
Taylor Jenkins Reid, One True Loves
“Just because something isn’t meant to last a lifetime doesn’t mean it wasn’t meant to be.”
Taylor Jenkins Reid, One True Loves
this is the most tumblrified man to have ever existed
I know a guy, but the guy is Google
They are the same and no one can convince me otherwise

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
One thing I noticed that no one talks about literally I didn't see anyone on here is that WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO REYNOLDS?!!?? WHERE'S MY MAN WENT ? HOW HE DIED ? WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM?? REYNOLDS 😭😭😭😭😭WHERE IS HEEE??!! 🥺
QUEEN CHARLOTTE & KING GEORGE
Unrestrained summer fun 😁
this must be such a delicate experience for a creature that can dive two stories deep and has been seen cliff diving into the ocean
HEARTBREAKING: Poor girl has to get out of the soft warm bed even though she is so so so so comfy
how come every day lasts ten years but every week lasts 3 seconds but every month lasts either two days or an eternity and then it's a new year and now it's November

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
The night gardener once asked me if I knew how citrus trees died: when they reach old age, if they are not cut down and they manage to survive drought, disease and innumerable attacks of pests, fungi and plagues, they succumb from overabundance. When they come to the end of their life cycle, they put out a final, massive crop of lemons. In their last spring their flowers bud and blossom in enormous bunches and fill the air with a smell so sweet that it stings your nostrils from two blocks away; then their fruits ripen all at once, whole limbs break off due to their excessive weight, and after a few weeks the ground is covered with rotting lemons. It is a strange sight, he said, to see such exuberance before death.
When We Cease to Understand the World, Benjamín Labatut
thank you for the insight
““What do you say when you’re not enough to make someone stay? What do you do when you meet the love of your life and realize it’s all about timing? How do you accept that no matter how perfect you are for each other, circumstances get in the way? How do you compete with that kind of fate?” - Katie Kacvinsky, First Comes Love”
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