Books and Gay Stuff

feeling like a huge Failure

terror of being Punished for not being Perfect

feeling absolutely despised and rejected

whatever part of you or your creations was criticized now feels Worthless

anxiety of being Never Good Enough

fear of being abandoned for obviously being a burden and dragging everyone down

feeling like everything is and forever will be Your Fault

streaming record of every other criticism you’ve received in your life that makes you feel inadequate

pain of having worked so hard to be perfect and having it all crash down

wondering if there was a purpose to you existing at all

believing Every Horrible Thing Ever Said about you must be true if this criticism is true

urge to defend, to explain, to yell and cry and write 12 page essay on why you did what you did

desperate attempts to prove it’s not true, changing everything to make criticism impossible

Guilt because you feel you Should Have Known Better

Wanting to quit everything you’ve ever started

Never wanting to interact with a human being again

Rage, because how could they, after everything, do this to you

Feeling like you’ll never be okay again unless the criticism is taken back and erased from existence, but maybe not even then because you’ve already heard it

Regretting what you did so badly you wish you could erase it and never do it again

Criticism instantly negates each and every positive feedback you’ve ever received

#queercharactersdeservemore #queerdeserveshappyendings

nishat & flávia. the henna wars, by adiba jaigirdar 💕

Day 29: JOMPBPC: Freebie

she’s inching forward. is there a heterosexual explanation for why she’s inching forward?