ZOO WEE MAMA

(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qENbMkM-eRQ)

(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cV2v6WFbWKo)

It is not his feelings the abuser is too distant from; it is his partner’s feelings and his children’s feelings. Those are the emotions that he knows so little about and that he needs to “get in touch with.” My job as an abuse counselor often involves steering the discussion away from how my clients feel and toward how they think (including their attitudes toward their partners’ feelings). My clients keep trying to drive the ball back into the court that is familiar and comfortable to them, where their inner world is the only thing that matters.

For decades, many therapists have been attempting to help abusive men change by guiding them in identifying and expressing feelings. Alas, this well-meaning but misguided approach actually feeds the abuser’s selfish focus on himself, which is an important force driving his abusiveness.

Cherry by Lana Del Rey

Darlin’ I said your love It’s like feeling no fear When you’re standing in the face of danger ‘Cause you just want it so much

Damage From your fame and love It’s like heaven taking the place of something evil And lettin’ it burn off from the rush Yeah, yeah

Darlin’, darlin’, darlin’ I fall to pieces when I’m with you I fall to pieces My cherries and wine Rosemary and thyme And all of my peaches

Love I said I need your love It’s like smiling when the firing squad’s against you But you just stay lined up Yeah, yeah

Darlin’, darlin’, darlin’ I fall to pieces when I’m with you I fall to pieces My cherries and wine Rosemary and thyme And all of my peaches

My rose garden dreams All my life needs And all my black beaches My celluloid scenes Are torn at the seams And I fall to pieces I fall to pieces When I’m with you Why?