just as you are @duelistjudai - Tumblr Blog

i have heated rivalry fanfic brainrot and just read one (with tears in my eyes the whole way through) where shane suffers a tbi after his accident in ep 5 and is left cognitively disabled. i need to go tf to bed

#yes it was wonderful and sweet and well written but ;;

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- picks more than anyone in the region

- takes care of both my departments

- micromanages tf out of my team (what the company wants)

am i missing something? what am i not doing??

btw im not training anyone and im not taking point from someone who doesnt know what they are doing, sincerely. idc. let them struggle and have to learn everything they know on their own like i did :) im not giving away trade secrets

#do i see if my parents have any nepo connections to rely on??#i didnt go to college #super smart of me ik

am i really going to get demoted for being too good at my job. is that what is happening

#my boss: let me know when you are having issues #me: lets her know about issues #my boss: wdym you cant find stuff?? youre losing control of the department??????

hate to applaud men but i evidently dont gas my man up enough, every time my coworker tells me something about theirs i realize the bar actually is that low

#my fiance loves me and shows me every day #and also..has exceptional hygeine showers brushes his teeth FLOSSES grooms everything #and that is to say i realize some people are not as lucky as me #this same coworker legit told me their bf doesnt like to brush his teeth and will go days #most recently they told me he likes to get drunk on weeknights and recently broke a glass #didnt clean it up properly #and my coworker cut their foot on it this morning #i mean

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took off the second skin and my yuki tattoo is thriving phew

#ik its kinda corny idc i love it #fruits basket #favorite character from my favorite series

also i think my au/dhd behaviours are taking over my life. i havent been medicated in years but im strongly considering trying to get back on some form of medication. like.

i have trouble sleeping, i cant turn my brain off, if work is stressful i have to wear my earbuds and listen to podcasts/osts to tune out stimuli so i can focus (even tho im not supposed to wear them at work), im always so erratic. im a basketcase at work trying to keep the department together and running all over the place and then i come home and im burnt out, almost like i cant do anything. its too hard.

ive noticed over the years that my behaviours are becoming more and more noticeable to me and its not a good feeling. idk if its because ive gotten worse or maybe just the self awareness and clarity that comes with getting older but idk. it sucks

#personal

panda-pal

Shampoo in "Mousse Goes Home to the Country!" Ranma ½: Season 4, Episode 21 (1991)

#ranma 1/2

getting older and realizing how much being autistic affected my life and always has has been. interesting. everything i dont like about myself is because of some autistic trait 🙁

#im actually scared to have kids at some point because i dont want them to have the same problems that i did #im not unhappy by any means but i had such a hard time growing up fitting in and making connections and never understanding why #meanwhile both my siblings never had a problem and prospered

having to back off my workload, let go of the reins at work and let my department run itself is driving me crazy. i am so bored. picking is the only part of my job i enjoy

#i understand the purpose but it kind of makes me feel useless #i realize as a lead i need to be there to support them and if i dont let them pick they wont get better #but im sooooo bored. i dont want to have anything to do with the sales floor and now im going to be expected to observe associates there 2 #ughhhhhhhhhhhhjjj #idk how i keep ending up in these leadership positions tbh #if i didnt need the money then idk

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straight up yearning post but i want a baby soooooo bad 😪 we just started talking about the next couple years of our lives, after we get married in september the plan is to hopefully have a house by december when our lease runs out, then we want to be in the house for 9months-to a year, get settled, and start trying. its actually crazy that i never envisioned being with a man but i met him, and nothing else mattered. legit love at first sight, ive never pursued a friendship before the way i did with this man, i just knew he was special and i had to get to know him. i love him so much. its crazy how things just fall into place. i never thought i would want kids either, but i met him and that all changed. i love him so much that i want a mini version ig. i love being an adult and getting older and things finally working out, and understanding life better bc ive finally matured. i suffered so much when i was younger but i feel like ive finally made it and its overwhelmingggg. im getting mf married at the end of this year and im doing it on my terms to someone who loves me. insane

#hi im back getting my thoughts down how are you #personal

need to bring back the trade rant thread bc some of yall need to be humbled

#lol. i had someone who is obviously a ninja trader cancel a trade on me #verbatim for posting on the ftt bc they dont trust the forums bc they devalue pets???#right. ok #lmao #chickensmoothie #cs

in another life im just a facebook mom posting pics of her kids

this is me and my son

#yes im alive #me

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lwri00

#ranma

i cant wait to go back to my cute little retail job where im good at things and everyone loves me and i get enough exercise and can wear what i want with a 7.00 pay raise UuU

#you would think credit unions would pay better fr #15.00 is not enough and probably will not be enough when the tariffs drop especially 🥲#it sucks bc the people there were nice kind of and i feel like i wasted their time #but i had to be away from my retail job #needed that 5 month break

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