The Storyteller

where’s my oscar for acting like i’m not falling apart 

i hate monopoly it is like some old white guy was sitting around and then thought to himself, what if we could make capitalism fun? well you tried and you failed dipshit

society is a horrific parody of itself

If America did more advertising like this, I wouldn’t mind commercials so much.

DY INg

that was pretty irresponsible of willy wonka to put a huge giant fan at the top of the room with the drink that made you uncontrollably fly directly up like put it in a different room dude that’s some real liability shit

sassy english teachers are the best because they’re beyond sarcastic and somehow always end up insulting the kid that you hate and everyone else likes

Why play video games when you can date me and play video games