im sleep deprived and ive been watching winter soldier over and over again. i have no regrets
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@dualpool
im sleep deprived and ive been watching winter soldier over and over again. i have no regrets

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All Thatâs Left Behind
@darcylewisinaction
Wade was no stranger to confrontation; hell, he usually caused it more than not. This was different though. This was hanging out with his ex girlfriendâs friends every day at work and trying to pretend that they didnât like her more than theyâd ever like him. He didnât blame them either, losing Darcy was the worst thing he had ever been through. Way worse than the torture and test experiments, and hideously deformed skin. It was waking up alone, covered in tequila and the stench of mistakes. It was calling out when coming home and realizing no one was there. It was being haunted by a memory of his own happiness.
And if that wasnât shitty enough, he had to see her sometimes and pretend everything was okay and that he could remain professional. She had insisted on it. She had been rambling about her and Jane having claimed S.H.I.E.L.D. first and that sheâd love to stay friends and that they could still work together as long as he kept her boundaries intact. Of course, Wade hadnât listened that well much less protested her demands. He assumed that it was another small fight and that theyâd be back together before his next mission but that mission came and went and he still slept alone in his run down apartment.
And sure, he could see the look of relief on her face when he came back mostly unharmed. Well, nothing a few days of rest and a hearty meal or two wouldnât fix anyways. But she didnât say it and although most people wished they could shut him up, this time he was quiet and out of words. He just nodded sadly and went home. Alone and miserable, he was used to it by now but the highs of love had made him forget about the lows of his normal life.
So today he was set to likely be sent off on another suicide mission. Well, what would be a suicide mission by anyone elseâs standard was typically just a minor discomfort and the need for a new suit after all of the bullet holes. He turned the corner and smashed straight into Darcy. He quickly hopped to his feet and pulled her up before letting go and stepping back quickly to break the touch they shared as quickly as possible.
âSorry, my fault.â It wasnât. Or maybe it was. He wasnât sure whether or not he was on her part of the facility or not. Not that there were invisible lines dividing the place or anything and he certainly didnât sneak in one night and draw them in chalk so that he could see the chalk stains and know where to avoid. There werenât any chalk stains right now though so that meant that she had probably stepped over to the operations wing which was outside of her usual area. Probably there for Stark or one of her other better-liked friends. He had done everything he could to avoid things like this happening and yet they still happened.
It was bad enough that the entire place was tainted with memories. The desks where they held late night rendezvous. The stairwells for mid-day make out sessions. The cafeteria where he first awkwardly asked her out to dinner. She was everywhere. Their failed relationship haunted every inch of S.H.I.E.L.D. headquarters. He had to get away from all this sooner rather than later. He wasnât sure he could take it any more.
She had opened her mouth to say something but Wade quickly put his finger over it to prevent her from saying anything. âYou wonât see me around anymore. Iâm going on my last mission today. Iâm going back to the private sector. More money, glory, women, etc. You know.â He turned quickly and walked off.
Darcy stood there, mouth halfway open in confusion and hurt. Under her breath she barely spoke. âBut Wade I miss you. I just wanted to tell you that before your mission.â He was already gone, of course. Heâd never know she still cared about him. And sheâd never know that he kept her picture by his bed for the next two decades.
If Youâre Not In It....
@darcylewisinaction
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Sublime Sentence Starters
You took my shame, and you took my pride.
My soul will have to wait
Light me up a cigarette
I would take it if I could.
Iâm not high on booze
Said Iâm gonna play with myself
I donât cry when my dog runs away
I gave her all that I had to give
Every day I love her a little bit more
Hereâs my telephone number, call me
I didnât know she had the G.I. Joe kung-fu grip
I smoke two joints in time of peace
Iâm gonna make you so feared.Â
Iâm the type of lover with the sensitivity
God knows Iâm not going back
Itâs that smell inside the van
I think she laughs inside.
I broke every single traffic rule.
Are you feelinâ the same way too?
One more secret lover that I shot dead.
Let me tell you about a girl I know
I keep my body strong, clean and âŚ.
Who taught you those new tricks?
Iâve come to tell you that sheâs evil most definitely
I was participating in some anarchy
I would not lie to you
Iâm on a run for attention but I just canât lose
They locked him up and threw away the keyâŚ
Nobody ever told her itâs the wrong way
Let it burn
Just remember that itâs flesh and bone
I got the microwave, got the VCR
Itâs your own life.
I ainât high I wonât lose
Itâs up to you what you really wanna do
Iâm gonna make it hard to live
Youâll be gone before too long
Ainât got no money to spend
All the people in the dance will agree
It gets so real sometimes
The tension is getting hotter
I wanna hear the same song twice
And every day I wonder if itâs over
I swim but I wish I never learned
Ainât got no quarrels with god
Iâd like to hold her head underwater
Saying Iâm happy when Iâm not
I smoke two joints in the morning
Damn I shouldnât start that talk,
Tell me where were you?
I can play the guitar like a mother fuckinâ riot
Oh well the bars are always open, and the time is always right.
Yo girl you donât mean a thing to me
Every day I love him a little bit more
Lonely, thatâs what I been
What is this shit on my face?
I love her so bad but she treats me like shit
âHe hates you cuz you kill people for money. Your morals are pretty much nonexistent plus he doesnât find you mentally stable.â She explained, crossing her arms and her glow dimming slightly.
âOkay, those are absolutely all good points, but also he created the killbots so... I feel like heâd win on the death toll, right? I mean Iâve been nothing but cool to all these guys even though I donât necessarily agree with their uppity judgmental little faces. I just want to hang out with the woman I care about without the little whispers in the hallway and the angry stares. You know?â He paused for a second before he back tracked. âAlso can we forget I mentioned the killbots, because he also sort of made you I guess, and that was pretty cool I think.â
âUh.  Only if thereâs data goinâ though them,â he said with a sheepish shrug.  ââS not electricity IâŚcontrol, I guess.  Iâs the zeroes anâ ones, the actual data.  I could probably use myself as a data conduit for tradinâ, with some practise on non-important ones like random pidgeys, buâ Iâve never tried.â
âThatâs not anywhere near as useful as it sounds, sorry.â He continued to look through the piles before he turned around. âUnless you can charge them.... with your mind... or something....â He said with a hopeful shrug before he kept rummaging. âIs Pidgey the one thats the fat little fire pig? My daughter loves that one.â
guardians of the galaxy; starter sentences.
âI am Groot.â
âSpare me your foul gaze, woman!â
âThey crumpled my pants up into a ball, thatâs rude! They folded yours!â
âYour demeanor is that of a pouty child.â
âYou canât. Youâll die. Why are you doing this?! Why?!â
âYou just wanna suck the joy out of everything.â
âWeâre just like Kevin Bacon.â
âI have lived most of my life surrounded my enemies. I will be grateful to die among my friends.â
âDance off bro, me and you!â
âWho put the sticks up their butts?â
âWhat percentage of a plan do you have?â
âI have no words for an honorless thief.â
âIâm distracting you, you big turd blossom!â
âLetâs see if you can laugh after five or six good shots in your freakinâ face!â
âQuit smiling, ya idiot, youâre supposed to be professional.â
âI just wanted to tell you how grateful I am that youâve accepted me despite my blunders.â
âNothing goes over my head. My reflexes are too fast, I would catch it.â
âThis is one fight you wonât win.â
âFine, but I canât promise when all of this is over Iâm not going to kill every last one of you jerks.â
âI like your knife, Iâm keeping it.â
âYOUâRE⌠MAKING⌠ME⌠BEAT⌠UP⌠GRASS!â
âI donât believe anyone is 100% a dick.â
âI donât learn. One of my issues.â
âNo one talks to my friends like that.â
âItâs cool to have a code name, itâs not that weird.â
âScrew this then, Iâm not waiting around for someone with a death wish.â
âIâve heard these small bodies find you attractive, so maybe you could work out some sort of deal.â
âIâm a warrior, an assassin. I donât dance.â
âWhere did you learn to do that?â
âI only ask that you take this matter seriously.â
âThey got my dick message!â
âI am not some starry eyed waif here to succumb to your pelvic sorcery!â
âThat was a pretty good plan.â
âCease your yammering and release us from this irksome confinement.â
âAinât no one like me, âcept me.â
âI am going to die surrounded by the biggest idiots in the galaxy.â
Street Tech
Five grand? Â Peterâs brain blanked for a moment, and that wasnât all that the other owed him. Â He hadnât exactly looked at what the money being offered for the contract was. Â The teen hadnât put together just how much they might pay out. Â Accepting it still bothered him, but he needed the funds. Â Letting out a slow breath he reached and took the money and twisted his backpack around to secret it away inside. Â Â âYeah, that will hold me.â
He eyed the older man, knowing his feelings over this wouldnât be solved quickly. Â âSo, all these contracts, going after people like that guy?â
âYeah, five grand? Whats the big deal?â He of course, always spoke before he thought. So it was after he said it that he remembered that this kid was either homeless or locked in some weirdoâs back room all the time, so five grand might have been something he considered to be a large sum. âYeah, pretty much. I mean, whoâs going to pay 20 grand or more to whack a nice old lady? Its always the assholes and scumbags with contracts on them.â Of course he had a reputation to uphold too. âNot that I wouldnât whack the old lady, thats easy money. But thats not how this job tends to go. Although occasionally youâll see like a corporate target, but letâs be honest... probably guilty of something anyways...â

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âMaybe it would be easier to find a new placeâ Darcy said with a smile, bouncing the tiny girl in her arms a little. At least the volume wasnât that high in here anymore. âYeah, because that would have been much better, if we killed my spawnâ she shook her head. âHeâs weird, you knowâ she told little Annie, who just yawned in response. Traitor. âWhat kind of life do you think Iâm living? Or course I have chocolate chipsâ she snorted, following him out to the kitchen to show him where she hid things. Mostly from herself.Â
âNah, my place has a lot of....sentimental value.. or something.â Wade replied. When he stepped into the kitchen he looked around. âOkay thatâs fair, Iâm glad your baby is alive?â He said, more of a question really. He wasnât the best at reading people or normal feelings. âAlso, where the fuck- er- where the fudge are the chocolate chips then? Iâm not seeing any here.â He was doing his best not to destroy her kitchen in the search but unfortunately his best was not always quite good enough for situations that required patience.
Sublime Sentence Starters
You took my shame, and you took my pride.
My soul will have to wait
Light me up a cigarette
I would take it if I could.
I'm not high on booze
Said I'm gonna play with myself
I donât cry when my dog runs away
I gave her all that I had to give
Every day I love her a little bit more
Here's my telephone number, call me
I didnât know she had the G.I. Joe kung-fu grip
I smoke two joints in time of peace
I'm gonna make you so feared.Â
Iâm the type of lover with the sensitivity
God knows I'm not going back
It's that smell inside the van
I think she laughs inside.
I broke every single traffic rule.
Are you feelin' the same way too?
One more secret lover that I shot dead.
Let me tell you about a girl I know
I keep my body strong, clean and ....
Who taught you those new tricks?
I've come to tell you that she's evil most definitely
I was participating in some anarchy
I would not lie to you
I'm on a run for attention but I just can't lose
They locked him up and threw away the key...
Nobody ever told her it's the wrong way
Let it burn
Just remember that it's flesh and bone
I got the microwave, got the VCR
It's your own life.
I ain't high I won't lose
It's up to you what you really wanna do
I'm gonna make it hard to live
You'll be gone before too long
Ain't got no money to spend
All the people in the dance will agree
It gets so real sometimes
The tension is getting hotter
I wanna hear the same song twice
And every day I wonder if it's over
I swim but I wish I never learned
Ain't got no quarrels with god
I'd like to hold her head underwater
Saying I'm happy when I'm not
I smoke two joints in the morning
Damn I shouldn't start that talk,
Tell me where were you?
I can play the guitar like a mother fuckinâ riot
Oh well the bars are always open, and the time is always right.
Yo girl you don't mean a thing to me
Every day I love him a little bit more
Lonely, that's what I been
What is this shit on my face?
I love her so bad but she treats me like shit
Becca packed for all eventualities - which included a lot more than what she would take on any other ship, but after a little while on this ship, she made her own calculations of what they might need. The changed course was noticeable, and she expected to be called to the bridge soon. The alarm, that wasnât actually an alarm but a summon, sounded, and Becca made her way to the bridge, nodding at crew members on the way. She entered the bridge. âSirâ she greeted the Captain. They couldnât be far out anymore.
Wade had forgotten he had requested her if he was honest. He looked around nervously. âOkay, I would definitely strap in for right now if I were you.â He held on tightly to the captainâs seat as the Romulan face showed up on the screen. âHey there, glad you guys could make it to the party. Yeah, Iâm doing well. Nothing to be concerned about, weâre just passing through on our way to that planet down there. Myself and the rest of Starfleet greatly appreciate your cooperation in allowing us to pass.â He was honestly surprised himself that he hadnât run out of breath in his spiel. If he had learned anything about communicating with aliens, it was that you couldnât give them a chance to speak. He pressed a button on his chair to mute the microphone from his side. âGuys, shieldâs up and weapons ready just in case. Any objections?â
âI canât wait for you to be old enough to sleep through the nightâ Darcy told her little girl, but she was unable to even sound mad when faced with her. She loved her too much, it was almost ridiculous; but now she knew how her mom had put up with little Darcy in the past. âNo Wade, I though you killed my baby, thatâs not funnyâ she rolled her eyes. Okay, he hadnât endangered her, so it might be a little amusing. In a day or so. âSorry sheâd kept you upâ Darcy said sincerely, smiling a little. âI can never say no to pancakes.â
âI agree.â Wade said before correcting himself. âNot that Iâll be here that long, I mean, if my apartment is not fixed by then I will have to fire my contractor....â He said with a laugh. âTo be fair, you did run into me, I think the correct term was âI thought we killed my baby,â right?â He turned and stepped out into the hall and towards the kitchen. As he passed he continued. âDo you have chocolate chips? Chocolate chip pancakes are great. Thats a better plan. It will be like IHOP except less expensive and probably better too, if Iâm allowed to toot my own horn a little bit in the pancake making skills category.â
She didnât find it necessary to reply to his message. Either he would come or he wouldnât. Loki had already decided that if he choose to stay away she wouldnât bother with contacting him again. There were plenty other men babysitters within this realm, at least one of them had to be capable of handling Sophia as well as Wade.Â
She intentionally left the door unlocked for him, not that she made a habit out of locking the door while she was home. She grabbed a magazine and sat on the couch, glancing through it for a nonchalant appearance in case he choose to walk in rather than knock.
Wade did knock on the door, it had been a week and he wasnât sure where they stood based on how they had left things off. He fiddled with his keys in his pocket as he waited for the answer. He also held a small handful of flowers behind his back because he felt like that was something that would help this situation. He knocked again quickly before leaning against the door with his ear, trying to see if anyone was even home.

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i need to tinkle, daddy
Wade sighed. âI asked you 5 minutes ago while we were at the restaurant if you needed to go before we left, sweetheart.â He turned to the childâs seat in the back of the minivan. The cats were on each side of her. They were on a road trip to surprise Loki while she was stuck in Avengerâs jail for being a bit of a pain to Thor. âIâll see if there is another exit, youâll just have to hold it for a little bit, okay?â
âBut you wonât let them take me away.â Sophia said with certainty. She didnât believe there was anything her father couldnât do other than keep her mother out of trouble and draw well. âYou can use the gift I made you.â She was referring to the lift sized katana she had made him out of play-dough and ice one day. The ice had melted, of course, but she the play-dough was hard as a rock now, though it wasnât as entirely functional as she believed it to be.
âIâm not sure I could stop them. Not without a lot of people getting hurt anyways. You wouldnât want that, right?â He didnât really want to extend that conversation any further if he could avoid it. âAre you excited to get to see her?â He turned the radio on to a soft 80s pop station and kept the volume just low enough to be heard in the background.
Street Tech
He watched Wade advance, and found his body automatically braced itself.  Alright it was going to be one of those skittish days.  He stood his ground and watched the merc with a wary gaze as he fought back the urge to flinch.  Listening to the olden manâs spiel didnât exactly make him feel reassured.  Instead  he simply gave a slow nod, his flat gaze flicking around the place.  âAlright, fine, Iâll take what you have for me now then, the rest later.â
Wade breathed a sigh of relief. That didnât go as bad as he thought it could. He backed away from the man and whispered to Weasel, who looked none too pleased at all before conceding and handing over a stack of cash. Wade took it and handed it over to Peter. âSo, its a little light, but 5 grand oughta hold you over for a few days right?â