On the Loss of Semantic Integrity in the English Language
People have been getting this wrong for centuries and the error stems from an egregious neglect of semantics. Firstly, it's "wherewolves" not "werewolves". The "h" was dropped during the Little Ice Age in England (early 1300s to mid-1800s) as subfreezing temperatures made the very action of breathing difficult. When the human body is exposed to extreme cold, something happens. Muscles involuntarily contract to maintain constant temperature. This is commonly known as shivering. While shivering more consonants are aspirated than normal. For instance, were and where would seem to be homophones. When written, scribes often took these words to be homographs as well in a process known as Homographization. We see many aspirated consonants dropped from words at this time. This was understandable then, but needs correction in the current age. With this understood we can now clearly see that the term "wherewolf" is misattributed to a from of lycanthropy that manifests under a full moon or some other astrological and/or biological cycle. Those, of course, are whenwolves. Wherewolves take on their savage attributes at specific locations (enchanted woods, Quileute burial grounds, cheap night clubs, etc.). The others follow just as readily. Whatwolves require a material component to transmogrify. This can be anything from a thrice-blessed wolf totem, to merchandise of certain Scandinavian Metal bands, to a sacred tattoo. Whowolves change in the company of other whowolves. On their own they seem docile, but when in a pack, they quickly emerge from dormancy causing chaos and considerable property damage. Whywolves are often triggered by lines that challenge their philosophical world view and respond violently. They are highly reclusive in nature and since time immemorial, they were considered a myth. Today, thanks to the popularity of Internet websites like the "Tumblr" and the "Twitter", this field of research has been making great strides forward! Also, as a side note, "howwolves" refers to lupine transformation in general. It is NOT, as is so commonly held (even by supposed experts), a separate form in and of itself. I hope you found this informative and useful. Go out there and wield this knowledge to taunt your inferiors. Finally, remember that lycanthropy in any form is passed through bodily fluids. Now, I know you've all heard this a million times, but if you decide to go off engaging in heretical blood rituals remember to wear proper gloves, a thick robe, and a carved & shielded mask. Yes, they're more expensive than the plastic ones, but they're much safer, last longer, and I think you'll find they don't fog up nearly as bad.
