why would you ask me that. why would you ever ask me that.

Post: atheist youtubers are overdosing on deep rock galactic pussy me: not true Post: bunnies and cats are learning how to write in new language called US american cuneiform me: thats right

It’s 2026 and getting frothing at the mouth angry at rainbow capitalism is still stupid because it’s always been a neutral barometer for the social climate around LGBT+ stuff by the way.

before pride month ends does anyone wanna admit they have a crush on me

posting this on the first day of june so you all have plenty of time to gather your nerves and whatnot

they put my blood through every test under the sun and yet nowhere in the pages and pages of lab reports do they tell me what my blood type is

your neutrophils absolute? 2.71. anion gap? why, that's 11! hemoglobin A1C? a solid 5.4. and don't fret, champ—your VLDL (calculated) is a cool 12. real fascinating stuff. hm? what's that? you want to know what kind of blood you have? like, so you won't have to look your next ER nurse in the eye and tell her you have no clue what type you have right after giving her a date of birth that confirms you are over 30 years old? psh, don't be silly! we can't tell you that! it's a ✨secret✨

they are poisoning us today with a thursday poison little do they know we’ve been through a few thursday poisonings so it won’t kill us just yet