Caught in a cave

I don’t know how to start this, other than to say this will be what it is. This will voice my feelings, my internal monologue and express how I have become the way I am. Have you ever felt that there’s so much to say, but don’t know how to say any of it? It sits in your brain, jumbled, without no outlet and never gets resolved. It haunts you day in and day out, still unsure how to grasp that feeling or that thought that has been bugging you for so long. When I was 16, I embraced my creative side and began writing/blogging. It was open to close friends a few others would see what I write as well. It best described who I was outside of school and off the ice or baseball field. I was never someone who could draw, or act, or sing, or – despite my mediocre efforts – play piano. I am someone who can’t have everything sitting in my cloud that is my brain for eternity. It has to be released. I have maintained a tumblr blog for almost 5 years now; however never used it to write. I have made the decision, with the help of my therapist, to change that. There will be no structure, no goal, no desire out of this. My only wish is to be satisfied with telling my story and ensure people truly know me, why I am here, and what I struggle with on a daily basis. This is my battle.