𝐷 𝐼 𝐿 𝐼 𝐺 𝐸 𝑁 𝑇 .

Passing thought causes his heart to skip a beat. He understands what he’s actually attempting to convey. It’s simply a confession he’s not equipped to allow her to carry on her shoulders as well, resembling article of clothing she’s currently swimming in.

“I’m great, never better,” she casually breathes in response to previous query.

Josh would be a fool if he even feigns belief in her. He recognizes she’s not what she claims to be. It’s written all over her face; he would know. He’s been studying for years.

Samantha explains further, and he glances toward the wall in front of him, contemplating each detail. He nods once, reiterating concentration. All eyes are on her, despite physical set traveling straight ahead.

Josh sighs and places hands together, fingers folding in tandem. “You do realize why…” be careful, “… everyone acted the way they did, right? It was weird for them, too. You’re-” He pauses, utilizing silence to increase years of study tenfold. Pupils cover every inch available, expanding and yearning for more. He can’t deny how she looks.

“- you’re fucking gorgeous, Samantha.” And he never calls her such. “They… didn’t know how to be grown ups about it.”

Ah, like you do now?

      the  words ,  of  course ,  come  as  a  shock  for  any  teenage  girl  who  doesn’t  explore  this  particular  side  of  themselves  on  a  regular  basis .  but  they  come  as  even  more  of  a  delightful  surprise  because  she’s  particularly  insecure .   and  they  are  a  total  bombshell  because  these  words ,  beautiful  and  disastrous ,  are  from  josh  washington . 

OBVIOUSLY  she’s  imagined  this  exchange  before .  in  her  mind ,  it’s  happened  a  million  times .  maybe  not  these  exact  words ,  but  something  like  “ you’re  beautiful ,  sam ,  especially  to  ME ,  dipshit . ”  and  then  –––  BOOM !!  long  and  steamy  kiss .  but  it’s  not  so  MILLS-AND-BOONE  as  she  has  conjured  in  her  dreams .   she’s  sitting  there  cold  and  awkward  and  the  air  in  the  room  dances  on  thin  ice .  

samantha  is  such  an  overtly  patronising  name .   cold ,  that’s  what  she’d  always  thought .  sam  is  so  much  more  accessible ,  friendly .  but  somehow  she  thinks  samantha  is  the  most  beautiful  name  in  the  world  at  that  moment .  

she’s  also  never  been  good  at  taking  compliments ,  brushing  them  off  with  a  witty  line  or  quick  answer .  she  never  likes  to  hog  the  spotlight  for  long ,  and  cheeks  show  her  unsureness .  eyes  flicker  from  their  spot  on  the  wall  to  other  eyes  beside  her .  she  doesn’t  know  what  to  say ,  everything  stuck  in  her  throat .  her  words ,  her  heart ,  her  focus .  

Sam: I don’t know what to do with this information.

Josh: Dog food lid is dildo of god backwards.