Doodoo Bin (MeMe Big Boy)

Also Me, Three Seconds into the Previews:

Someone: What does that-

Lemony Snicket: *appearing out of thin air* The acronym V.F.D. can stand for a great number of mysterious places and things. For example, it can refer to a secret organization fighting fires. However, it can also stand for a village standing in the middle of the Hinderlands. It can be a silly phrased devised by a group of silly people who prefer heart-shaped balloons to the usage of new medical technology. There is a great plethora of things that V.F.D. could stand for (a word here which means a great number of myserious places and things) that it is almost impossible to say what this particular V.F.D. stands for.

my face: feels soft afterwards

me, every time: 

me: