kyle

lgbtq obama: let me be queer

ball obama: let me be sphere

steak obama: let me be seared

perv obama: let me see your rear

hunter obama: let me eat deer

driver obama: let me steer

bad driver obama: let me veer

cosplayer obama: let me be Near

alcoholic obama: let me have beer

magician obama: let me appear

sports fan obama: let me cheer

athlete obama: let me get my gear

nosy obama: let me hear

creepy obama: let me leer

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Hi. If you've found this account because you've heard things about me, my name is Ayesha, I'm 18 years old, and I think it's time I explain my side of the story instead of letting rumors speak for me.

I've seen people call me a harasser, dangerous, and other things. I understand why people have questions, but I also believe a lot of context has been lost along the way.

I'm not writing this to start another argument or to convince everyone to like me. I'm writing this because I think it's only fair that my perspective exists too.

The first situation

Around three months ago, I had a disagreement with someone I'll call Bob.

From my perspective, it started because what I was trying to say was misunderstood. The disagreement escalated into a much bigger conflict than it should have, and my profile ended up being shared publicly. As a result, many people formed an opinion of me based on one incident without knowing me personally.

I'm not saying I handled everything perfectly. I didn't. But I also don't think the image of me that spread around accurately reflected who I am or what happened.

Idk if he apologised but i did for the immature stuff I said, but i think think this situation already died out.

My mental health

After those events, I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. (Cyclothymia)

This diagnosis doesn't excuse my behavior, and I'm not asking anyone to overlook mistakes because of it. What it does provide is context.

Before I knew what was happening, I struggled with impulsivity, emotional outbursts, and rapid mood changes. Those symptoms affected the way I communicated online.

Since then, I've sought professional help, attended therapy, and worked on managing those symptoms. I'm continuing that process because I want to become a healthier person. Yayy

About Kinz VOL1

At some point I stopped following Kinz because some of her content made me personally uncomfortable. That was my decision, and I chose to distance myself rather than interact.

Later, I made posts that were about people from my real life.

Kinz believed those posts were about her and responded publicly.

From my perspective, they weren't.

I replied sarcastically with emojis. Looking back, maybe that wasn't the most productive response, but I didn't view it as harassment or as an attempt to continue a conflict.

After that exchange, I stopped interacting with her. (I did a longer time before, avoiding her and all because she made me uncomfortable but this time we mutually blocked eachother. She and her friend apologised and so did i. That's how i thought I'd never see or hear of her again. But I was wrong.)

The recent accusations VOL2

Recently I made another vague post, again referring to someone from my real life.

Once again, Kinz assumed it was about her.

That assumption has now turned into people calling me a harasser and a danger to others.

I disagree with that characterization.

I cannot prove who my posts were about, just as nobody else can prove they were about Kinz. Unless someone has direct evidence showing I intended those posts to target her specifically, it remains an assumption rather than a fact.

I'm a very talkative person offline, I work with lots of different people (as i said a long time before, I'm a showman)

Why I don't believe the word "harassment" applies

Harassment generally refers to repeated unwanted behavior directed at a specific person with the intent or effect of intimidating, threatening, or causing distress.

From my perspective, that isn't what happened here.

I chose to distance myself. I didn't seek out continued contact. I wasn't repeatedly messaging or targeting Kinz directly. MOREOVER I DNI completely

Meanwhile, some of my own information and profile were shared publicly, and I was called names in public discussions.

That doesn't mean anyone else is automatically wrong or malicious, but it does mean the situation is more complicated than "Ayesha is harassing someone."

About this account

This side blog has always been somewhere I vent my thoughts. Or take my rage out.

Many of my posts are about people I know personally in real life.

If someone recognizes themselves in something I write, that doesn't automatically mean they were the intended subject.

The world is a big place. Different people can have similar behaviors.

My boundaries

I've always tried to be honest about the fact that I struggle with emotional regulation.

If you don't want to see someone who occasionally vents, has mood swings, or posts incoherent thoughts, then it's completely okay not to follow or interact with me.

I'm not forcing anyone to stay here.

I'd like to respond to a few things, to kinz

First, using my real name to mock me, calling me "pussy," "jackass," "pathetic," and "a horrible person" isn't constructive criticism. It's public name-calling. If the goal was to resolve a conflict, I don't think that kind of language helps either of us.

Second, I never said everyone should share my views on sexuality or that people shouldn't discuss sexual topics. If something made me uncomfortable, I chose to distance myself. That's why I unfollowed and stopped interacting. Everyone has different boundaries, and that's okay.

Third, saying that I should have blocked and moved on ignores the fact that I did stop interacting. I wasn't trying to continue a relationship or friendship.

Regarding my mental illness: I'm not asking anyone to excuse my mistakes because of it. I've said repeatedly that it explains some of my impulsive behavior, not that it makes it acceptable. There's a difference between explaining and excusing.

Finally, I don't think it's fair to tell people that "the fandom was right about everything" or reduce someone to insults. People are free to dislike me, criticize me, or avoid me. But I'd rather be judged based on facts than on assumptions or personal attacks.

Closing

I'm not asking everyone to agree with me.

I'm not asking everyone to forgive me. (I'm not apologising either. The only stuff I'm sorry for is not being able to me more mature, but i can't control taht either)

I'm simply asking people not to turn assumptions into facts.

If I've hurt someone unintentionally, I'm genuinely sorry for that. But I also don't think it's fair to label someone a harasser without clear evidence that they repeatedly targeted a specific individual.

One thing I also want to point out is that I was publicly called names, insulted, and had my account and my personal posts shared around. At the same time, people might assume that vague posts I made were about someone whose side blog I didn't even know existed. To me, being publicly singled out, insulted, and having your profile circulated is much closer to targeted harassment than making general vent posts about people I know in real life.

I gossip and vent about people I personally know. Not every vague post is about the same person, and I don't think it's reasonable to assume every complaint I make must be directed at one individual. Similar situations can happen with different people, and similarity alone isn't proof that someone was the target.

I'm just someone trying to enjoy drawing, participate in a fandom, and continue working on myself.

If that's not the kind of person you want to follow, that's completely your choice.

I genuinely wish everyone well, including the people who don't like me.

Ps

And notice, Kinz, without using a single insult in your direction, I challenge you to find an argument for each of the things I listed here. No offense, but stop acting like you have protagonist syndrome. I understand you hate me (probably because I said you make me uncomfortable, but still), but why do you use EVERY negative thing I say against yourself??? You're not a thief until you get caught. And if that information makes you feel better, unfortunately incest is pretty popular in my country, especially among people who live on the countryside. Which is EW.

regardless of who you were talking about, it’s all so strange. kinz’s mutuals have literally confirmed that you were talking ABOUT her, so why are you denying it?

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I take my apologies back, nevermind dude you're fucking disgusting. If you interact with babayka, don't interact with me. I don't wanna share people i know with a sick minor with fucking disgusting fetishes and description of them asking to jerk off to their picks.... And it's only a small part I found about.... I wanna throw up, imagine getting hard on a thought of having a kid inside of you....or dreaming about getting 🍇aped ....

Sorry not not sorry, please stop talking to me if you talk to them. If you know you know. I'm genuinely scared and uncomfortable.

"but heya um, they're not hurting anymore maybe you guys could talk this ou-"

NO. NONONONONONOM NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO KEEP THAT PERSON FAAR AWAY FROM ME. I DON'T WANNA TALK TO THEM. THIS TOPIC ABOUT IS NOT EVEN ABOUT ME, I JUST FOUND OUT ABOUT THIS FUCKING SCARY TRAIT AND I'M GENUINELY TERRIFIED.

MƏN BU VƏHŞİ BƏDƏNƏ VAR DEYİLƏM VƏ ARTIQ BU VƏHŞİ BƏDƏNƏ İLƏ HEÇ BİR İŞİM OLMAQ İSTƏMİRƏM

SİKDİR GETSİN BU POX

I unironically pray for this weird kid's parents to check their phone one day, find out about this bullshit and beat the shit outta them. I judge home violence but that child needs to taste some belt fr...

the way you’re portraying this is sick, and you’re talking about this person like they’re a vile and disgusting creature. btw, the dream post was obviously her talking about her unpleasant nightmare about being, yknow, raped. it’s not a fetish, and the fact you’re mentioning it is stupid.

i don’t know how old you are, but if you’re an adult, you shouldn’t be talking about a minor this way and going out of your way to harass her. a minors brain isn’t fully developed, and your acting like she’s an adult who knows what she’s doing.

she is a child.

also, what she is into is not your business and you shouldn’t shame her for it. if it’s not illegal, don’t worry about it. if it’s not hurting you or anyone else, why is it such a big deal? you don’t have to like it, and if you think it’s weird, that’s fine. but you shouldn’t make this a whole callout post and basically shit all over them for having certain preferences. you’re weird as fuck. also, why are you talking about her being beaten? i think you’re the sicko here lmfao. talking about her parents finding her account and beating the shit out of her is such a weird thing. you’re basically fantasizing about child abuse.

I take my apologies back, nevermind dude you're fucking disgusting. If you interact with babayka, don't interact with me. I don't wanna share people i know with a sick minor with fucking disgusting fetishes and description of them asking to jerk off to their picks.... And it's only a small part I found about.... I wanna throw up, imagine getting hard on a thought of having a kid inside of you....or dreaming about getting 🍇aped ....

Sorry not not sorry, please stop talking to me if you talk to them. If you know you know. I'm genuinely scared and uncomfortable.

"but heya um, they're not hurting anymore maybe you guys could talk this ou-"

NO. NONONONONONOM NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO KEEP THAT PERSON FAAR AWAY FROM ME. I DON'T WANNA TALK TO THEM. THIS TOPIC ABOUT IS NOT EVEN ABOUT ME, I JUST FOUND OUT ABOUT THIS FUCKING SCARY TRAIT AND I'M GENUINELY TERRIFIED.

MƏN BU VƏHŞİ BƏDƏNƏ VAR DEYİLƏM VƏ ARTIQ BU VƏHŞİ BƏDƏNƏ İLƏ HEÇ BİR İŞİM OLMAQ İSTƏMİRƏM

SİKDİR GETSİN BU POX

I unironically pray for this weird kid's parents to check their phone one day, find out about this bullshit and beat the shit outta them. I judge home violence but that child needs to taste some belt fr...

the way you’re portraying this is sick, and you’re talking about this person like they’re a vile and disgusting creature. btw, the dream post was obviously her talking about her unpleasant nightmare about being, yknow, raped. it’s not a fetish, and the fact you’re mentioning it is stupid.

i don’t know how old you are, but if you’re an adult, you shouldn’t be talking about a minor this way and going out of your way to harass her. a minors brain isn’t fully developed, and your acting like she’s an adult who knows what she’s doing.

she is a child.

also, what she is into is not your business and you shouldn’t shame her for it. if it’s not illegal, don’t worry about it. if it’s not hurting you or anyone else, why is it such a big deal? you don’t have to like it, and if you think it’s weird, that’s fine. but you shouldn’t make this a whole callout post and basically shit all over them for having certain preferences. you’re weird as fuck. also, why are you talking about her being beaten? i think you’re the sicko here lmfao. talking about her parents finding her account and beating the shit out of her is such a weird thing. you’re basically fantasizing about child abuse.