A character who is fluent in violence but absolute rubbish at receiving tenderness.
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@divergent-lines
A character who is fluent in violence but absolute rubbish at receiving tenderness.

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“If someone thinks they have the upper hand, break it.”
— L.J. Gibbs (via devourery)
This is basically how that conversation went

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im only attracted to worthy opponents
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“I’d die for you,” is great. “I’d kill for you,” is fantastic. But “I’d live for you?” PEAK!!
Not "The Character did nothing wrong" or "The Character is irredeemably awful" but a secret third thing: The Character may display moments of deep love & compassion, may even have a strong sense of ethics, and may also be capable of brutal cruelty that is irreconcilable with those traits. The constant tension between the different sides of The Character's nature is exactly what makes them compelling, and attempting to reduce them down to simply "a terrible person" or "innocent & misunderstood" is missing the point of the questions a media with nuanced characters is asking you to consider
Feralas- Village Library
mentions: @divergent-lines
Synric arrived four hours before dawn at the library. The amount of people was to be expected for a village mostly composed of night villagers; a few students sat in chairs and tables reading studiously while taking notes, a parent with an older child wander around browsing, and lastly, a small group of people who weren’t reading any books at all, but where seemingly just playing cards games, and practicing magic in quiet manners with occasionally giggling and whispering.
The library was busier than the first time. Synric found it refreshing and yet curious. The far group, practicing magic and playing cards, held his lingering gaze. There where three men and two women; they looked to be his age, lacking the tattoos. One of the women spotted him, stalled, causing the other too look, then all three men. Synric found himself himself turning away and choosing to find the quickest exit out of their sight--that path was the countertop where the librarian stood, hunched over a open book, with a pair of reading glass.
The librarian was a woman with light purple hair, a few decorated flowers strewn in that were more jewelry than real flowers despite how real they looked. She wore a simple summer dress of modest design. The glasses glowed ever so faintly as she read her book, then her eyes shifted to the a piece of paper beside and wrote fluid darnassian. Curiosity got the better of Synric as he walked by the counter. He intended a passing look, but when he saw that the book had no letters written on it, he stopped.
The librarian looked up without moving her head. She frowned firstly, then her eyes brighten with a smile. “Ronan?”
Syrnic blinked at her, before remembering to offer a smile in return. “Hello," he inclined his head.
She chuckled softly, closed the book, and took the glasses off; they hung around her neck from a stone string. “I heard the rumors you returned. Khadris told me how it was all true you had forgotten everything.” She eyed him up and down as Synric seemed stupefied by this revelation, she continued more apologetic, “You’re greeting tells me everything.” She said with a lofty sigh. “You look better though. So maybe it wasn’t for the worse that you forgot." Her pause came reflectively, "Do you know what happened?”
Synric blinked, feeling a faint heat of embarrasement take to his cheeks as he glanced towards the tables and the other people nearby. No one was looking, but their actions had slowed somewhat and the air felt quieter as if listening.
He shook his head. “I’m sorry, I don’t,” he said feeling the familiar comfort of the words he'd been repeating this last week. “What was your name again?” Her smile was soft, but sad, “Oh, of course,” She offered a hand to him. He hesitated, before taking it. “Lenne Farhelm, I’m Khadris assistant, and student,” she winked.
“Student?”
She nodded easily, “Not my Shand’o,” she clarified, “He doesn’t take official students, as you…” she cut herself off, shaking her head as she straighten herself up more professional. “Well, I help with the task here and he teaches me what I need to do to help.”
Synric reflected back to earlier that week when he ran into Khadris, how the librarian had mentioned him being a student as well. “Does he have more ….students?”
Lenne gave a soft, knowing smile. “No, he is very particular of who he teaches, but, he can’t run the library day and night.” She snickered.
“He works the day?” He questioned, but the certainty of his voice only made her smile and nod.
“He starts an hour before dawn.” She took in a breath. “Anyways, do you need help finding anything? Strange to ask you that,” She added under her breath.
“No, I…” he glanced at the tables momentarily, but he couldn't see the group of five from where he stood. "I was wondering...."
She raised her hand. He stopped. “You don’t need my permission. Let me know if you need help,” she said as she put her glasses back on and started reading before taking her notes once more.
Synric watched for a moment before he turned, deciding to walk around. He wandered to the far back, where there seemed to be no people around, and there was a deeper silence. His eyes took in the titles, the different binders of the books, the letters written on them, but his mind was trying to remember why exactly he wanted to come here.
This morning was mostly a blur of exhaustion and emotions, but it had been for research. Had it been about runes? Some sort of device for mana control? He wished he could recall, but the clearest memory he had was the mana stones and the feeling of the magic returning to him, before falling asleep and waking up to Sabina, the druid, arriving at the house to offer aid for Talren condition.
Strangely, the druids touching Talren still didn’t settle well with him despite having thought of asking Faelynn if she would entertain the idea to try Selise or Nairus for a second, outside, opinion. He trusted them both, but now that a stranger offered to help, he couldn't help but think what could a druid do for Talren issues? The nightmare had attacked his soul, attempting to devour and twist who he was, what was so different about him versus Talren? Just the length of time? That he still was cursed, and the two magics simply did not match?
And there was still the nagging issue in the back of his mind about the light magic used to keep Talren alive and unchanged through it all.
Decided, Synric forgo the idea of research into runes and regents to figure out a way to make a device that helped him identify when he was losing mana or not, and instead started looking towards corruption and nightmare magic.
In a span of ten minutes, he had found five books. Two where scentific and moral research into the darker magic, theories and idea where it came from, and what it did to an individual, but it felt all superificial; in a sense, it was cherry picked for students required to learn and nothing more. The other three had been, in a sense, children stories disguised as papers and books about the subject.
By the time he got through the first two, he had a feeling he had already read all of these, and that there was nothing here for him to learn. Despite that, he spent the next four hours reading the last three books he had chosen.
He was skimming through the last one, about hundred pages left, when a knuckle knocked on the table he was sitting at. Startled, Synric focused up and towards Khadris. The head librarian gave a smile in greeting, his silver eyes shifting towards the books Synric had piled to the side, then to the one he had in his hand. “You know,” the man’s smooth voice began, “You have read these before.”
Synric gave the lightest frown as he looked at the book, then closed it slowly. “I came to that conclusion within the first hour.”
Khadris chuckled, “And yet you still read them. Did they seem new to you?”
Synric shook his head. “I figured it didn't hurt to re-read them in case anything new seemed to stand out, just in case.”
Khadris laughed at that. “Marvelous, despite the memory lost, you still keep to your old habits. Not to say I'm studying you” he seemed to apologize, proudly though, at Synric narrowing gaze. “I just have never known someone before that has had full amnesia, and research only takes you so far, the real experience is what is important.” He said in a rather teacher like fashion. Synric relaxed. He gave a short nod. “Those sound like familiar words."
Khadris seemed to relax with him, taking a breath. “I am told I do like to repeat myself." The silence began too grew between the two, and so Khadris wasted little time in walking over and reaching for the book Synric had closed beforehand. “The information you probably want is in the other room. I showed you how to get in there beforehand?” Khadris raised his voice in question as he sat that book upon the pile beside him.
Synric nodded, “Yes, sorry, I….” Khadris shook his head. “You have proven even now that you are the same man I knew beforehand. You have my permission, and if anyone has issues, they can speak with me.” He picked up the stack of books, all five. “I---I can put them away,” Synric said quickly, standing.
Khadris paused, eyeing him up and down. They stood equally tall beside each other, obviously so, and with Synric younger look, almost teenager like appearance, Khadris felt himself become wary. He gave a polite smile as he siad, “Do you remember where these go?”
Synric gave him an odd look, but no further explanation came as Khadris handed him the books. “It is my job to make sure they go back accordingly, so please,” He said and stepped back, ushering a hand out for Synric to move ahead.
Synric eyed the elf, then went and started his way to the section he had gotten the books.
They were located in several different areas. Yet, Synric had no issues finding them, taking no wrong turns or seconds guesses. He adjusted the books accordingly before sliding them in their spots, and the last few had been located in the quieter place of the library at the top shelf that required him to stand on tip-toes to reach.
Khadris gave a pleased nod, then said, “You by chance know where the the book called Alchemy and Spirits is located?” The question garnered a curious look from Synric, and it felt much like a test, but he didn’t think much further on it. He knew the book was located in the third aisle, bottom shelf, a quarter of the way down on the left. As he knelt to read the titles, he paused; it was indeed the alchemy section for books but none held the title. He frowned lightly wondering if maybe he had been mistaken. Khadris smiled fatherly at him before he could think too long. “It has been missing for weeks. I have yet to determine if someone snuck it out or it has been misplaced,” he said softly.
Synric eyes went wide and he stood up quickly, “I promise you I don’t have any…” Khadris laughed, “Easy son,” he said and set a hand on Synric shoulder. “It disappeared after your own disappearance.” Then stepping back, eyed Synric up and down again. “How have you been adjusting back to the village?”
Synric gaze lingered on Khadris for a moment, then looked towards the rows of shelves. “I am learning.”
Khadris expression dimmed into stoicism, “And have you learned about your hunting parties and the odd jobs you did around the village?” Synric looked back, giving him another curious look but shook his head. “I am still healing,” he said motioning his hand out in explanation.
Khadris kept his gaze steady on him before he said, “Well, if your healing doesn’t mind helping here in the library, I do not mind the extra help from time to time.”
Synric brighten, growing more intrigued, and as if expecting the question coming to the surface of Synric throat, Khadris began to turn and say, “You use to help me before. You came around sunset. In exchange, I gave you permission to go into the library below, but being that I gave that to you free this time,” he gave it a thoughtful hum. “Perhaps we can do a trading system.” He glanced over his shoulder, spying Synric growing excitement. Khadris expression soften as he turned back around and started walking away. “Simply ask what you may need, and I'll see what I can do to help." He gave him a wave. “Give it some thought, and maybe talk to your guardians this time around instead of us being secret about it?” He ended as he turned around the corner of the shelf, his smile looking like a smirk, before he disappeared from view, leaving Synric with a brighter smile at the prospect of doing something else with his time.
Wistman's Wood, Dartmoor by Dr Stanislav Edward
having feelings that contradict your morals is soooo fucking annnoooooyyyiiingggggg. can the emotions and logic department get on the same page im tired of having to like strangle myself into being a tolerable person

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