poetic beauty

you’d think casper was being asked to jump out of a plane. instead, he stepped toward the foldable metal contraption that dared to call itself a ferris wheel. anything that was on his mind prior had been flushed out. he put on a brave face for jiwon. this was what she wanted to do, and this was something that mean a lot to her. he could suck up his fear for ten minutes to make her happy for the rest of the evening. it seemed like a fair trade off. he sat down next to her, lifting his arms so the could lower the metal bar over their laps. he decided that distracting himself was the best method, and perhaps the only way he could go to the top without kicking and screaming. he wrapped his arm around jiwon’s shoulders and buried his head in her neck. “hail mary.. full of grace...” he prayed aloud, mostly to make her laugh. with the arm around jiwon, casper plucked the cocoa cup out of her hands and sat up right, taking a sip of hers before handing it back. before he could make another snarky comment, their cart jerked forward and lifted the two of them off the ground. casper let out the softest squeak of horror before clearing his throat out out of sheer embarrassment. “we’re so gonna die, jiwon, we’re gonna die and we haven’t even done all the things we wanted to do.” he was milking it now.

cas found it difficult to stifle a laugh at the way jae panicked. he acted as if casper was going to push him out into the middle of the ice to fend for himself. but he wouldn’t argue, in fact he preferred to soothe. “i won’t let go, i won’t let go.” he repeats like a mantra, a smile growing on his lips at their proximity. while it was inadvertent this time, jae had never been one to pull casper in closer. he relished in the small gesture, even if it was for survival. “gosh you’re dramatic. you’re much more adept than you think. it’s all mental, believe me.” he says softly, gliding backwards on his skates to keep their pace up. they didn’t hang out in the real world as much, given jae had quite the schedule and cas had a habit of disappearing. this felt overdue. jae had this soft spot in casper’s heart. he knew how to bring the old cas back with his presence alone. it was a feeling of security that overwhelmed casper’s body whenever he was with jae. things were delicate for the two of them, however. jae had too much going for him to ever get involved with someone like casper. whether it was his many responsibilities or the bright future ahead of him, jae didn’t need anything else to worry about. so casper intended to milk what they had for as long as he could. until jae realizes he doesn’t need someone like cas around. “y’know, that eight year old has lapped us twice now. no pressure.”

casper nods at the carny, implying he can take the bunny down for the stranger. he thanks him quietly and hands it over, turning his full attention to the other now. “i feel like the only reason it isn’t in the olympics is because I would wipe the floor with the competition.” he teases back. cas gathers the plushies he’d won in his arms, stuffing his wallet away in his coat pocket. “a challenge? well i’m man enough to admit i haven’t actually tried another game... so i’m a bit nervous.”

“another one! hell yeah this game is my fucking BITCH!” casper exclaimed, throwing his long arms in the arm in celebration. casper was a very athletic person in general, so tossing a ball at stacked milk jugs was child’s play. he quickly apologized to the carny in charge of restacking bottles, feeling somewhat guilty for clearing house of prizes. sure, it was 3 plushies thus far but casper was a competitive soul. once he found something he was good at, he was wiling to milk it for all it had. no pun intended.“anyone want a plushie? it’s on me. i already have two.” he called out to anyone who he’d startled with his ridiculously loud celebration. 

a week of successful avoidance of his roommate had put casper’s mind at peace. he hadn’t had to think about where they stood since moonsu’s relationship began, and he didn’t have to explain himself. he could go out and crash on someone else’s couch or arrive home so late (or early in the morning) that he wouldn’t have to interact. it was fool proof, really. until the frostival came around. casper sat at the kettlecorn stand, nearly bouncing in anticipation of his fresh snack. it would be such a nice contrast of the cold snow and the hot popped corn. he sent a quick glance toward the crowds near the rides and he quickly locked eyes with the last person he had hoped to see. he broke eye contact immediately and looked at the clerk with a sense of urgency. that urgency was not matched, whatsoever. shutting his eyes and taking a deep breath, he prepared himself. he could do one of two things, he could grab his kettle corn and bolt or he could be a decent human being and at least say hello. his conscious gnawed away at him, deciding that his behavior this week warranted a greeting at the very least. kettlecorn finally in hand, he marched to his death ( as his heart rate would lead him to believe ) and paused in front of moonsu. “hey there. kettle corn?” ( @moonsus )

“keep your ankles straight. stop looking at the ice, look at me.” he mumbles, holding jae’s wrists as he skates backwards slowly. instructing jae to skate was going to be a challenge, casper knew this going in, but he wasn’t entirely prepared for the the amount of times they would both slip. this was due in part to casper allowing jae to put all his balance in the taller. it was a bit of a disaster, but casper laughed it off and maintained words of encouragement. he did his best to catch jae when he’d fall, preventing the boy from hurting himself too severely on the way down. the truth was, any time with jaehyun was time well spent. the setting was just too romantic to discount as well. there were plenty of people around, flurries of snowflakes fell in jae’s hair and eyelashes. it felt like a date, but casper was scared to announce that out loud. instead, he would ruffle the snow from jae’s hair every now and again and whisper words of encouragement. “you’re actually doing really well. i think you may be ready for me to skate next to you. what do you say?” ( @ftjaehyvns )

“is now a bad time to disclose i’m afraid of heights?” casper asks jiwon softly, eying the intimidating metal contraption that’s somehow passing as a ferris wheel. they were huddled together for warmth as they waited in line for the ride. clutching his hot chocolate in one hand, he used his free hand to loop his arm around jiwon’s. “i mean i feel like once we’re at the top and we see that view, i’ll be fine. but i keep thinking about how this death trap folds up and travels around the country to other festivals.” he mumbles, stepping forward as the line moves along. he takes a sip of his hot chocolate and focuses his attention, instead, on the girl next to him. “you’re a fan of these things though, yeah?” he asks, allowing jiwon to distract him from the anxiety in the pit of his stomach ( @ofjiwon )

Casper: yes do better than me