Fixer Upper

“ Am now. ”

Roadhog hefted himself up to his feet, grumbling a bit at the ache in his joints. Seemed like it got harder and harder to get up, older and more worn out he got.

“ … how’ve you been? ” he asked, a little awkwardly given he wasn’t used to giving a shit about what other people had been up to. Was sort of curious how her life had been going, though. If she wasn’t here cuz she was mad, he figured he might as well catch up a bit.

A mischievous grin stretches across her face as he gets himself up. Now now, Mako. If you took better care in the food you ate to promote healthy joints, this wouldn’t happen. “Me? Never!”

The question actually kind of caught Alinta off guard. She’d not expected him to inquire into her today, let alone her past day-to-days. “Ahh, there ain’t much to be, eh? Just roamin’ the Outback like some crazy old vigilante sheila, playin’ at Waltzin’ Matilda.” Honestly? It wasn’t a lie, but there was more to the full truth. Being the company of nothing but hot, buzzing air had done very little for her. Perhaps it really was why she sought to bother the old boar.

A sharp snort, gaze now trained on that rifle. 

“ Keen eye’s fine. Just got tired, ” Hog groused. Might’ve been jumpy around her – for very good reason – but he still had his pride to defend. “ Why’re you here? ”

“What a way to greet a guest! First y’prepare t’fill me head with scrap, now ‘why’re you here’? I’m hurt. I can’t just wanna visit an old mate?” She put her hand over her heart to sell the charade. “Gets lonely out there all by meself, y’know! Self isolation is rough! Can’t all be giant antisocial pigs.” If they could, Roadhog wouldn’t be so unique. And unique was fun. Just like her little car Jac and her vitiligo.

Holy SHIT person there he’d not heard come in, the large man emitting what could only be described as a panicked snuffle. There was a scramble to go for his scrap gun, a fistful of ammo stuffed into it before he even realized who was talking.

“ … oh. Hey. ”

Somehow knowing who it was … did not make him feel much better. Lady was scary as hell and only seemed to appear in his life again when she was mad. Did Rat do something again? Stupid question, he was always up to shit. But how bad was it? Did it call for another drugging and threat of violence?

Don’t worry, Mako. She wasn’t here to scold you. She just came for a visit and... let herself in. Y’know. Like any good house guest. “Bit jumpy, ain’t we? Guess y’did just wake up. Where’d that keen eye o’ yours go? I know where the keen ear went.” Namely Junkrat and his explosives.

Shadows that weren’t really there loomed in his vision, phantom enforcers backing up the Queen’s princess, Alice. She was definitely talking. His ears were buzzing, letting in only select words like trap, which only served to make him more twitchy. Was the Queen indigenous though? He didn’t think she was.

Jac knew Rats well because he did bite when her hand strayed too close to his mouth. However, he immediately let go not a second after, fearing that the dingos would tear out his throat for hurting their master, or the enforcers would remove his teeth… A smear of blood, like cheap rouge, tinged his lips; and like someone who didn’t know how to apply it, also his teeth.

“Th’ dog?” He said, giggling. “A dog’s the queen’s heir! Tha’s beautiful! Makes perfect sense!” This was too funny. Yes, he always called her majesty Queen Bitch, but he didn’t mean it like that. Still, he liked it and couldn’t help but tilt his head back against the wall and cackle wildly. “Good on ya, Alice.” He gave Eliza a congratulatory pat on the head.

It took him a few moments to settle back down. “Wot was we talkin’ bout?”

Why did every iteration of this man have such a nasty fuckin’ bite? It hurts every god damn time.

Despite it, Jac didn’t chastise him, nor even make a show of it outside of nursing it, occasionally putting it in her mouth in an attempt to clean and soothe once she moved it away from his face.

She wasn’t particularly sure what he was suddenly on about, but... “Eliza. Her name is Eliza. You’re thinkin’ o’ Alice springs now, mate.” Gently, she placed a hand on his shoulder, in a partial attempt to help ground him. Meanwhile, the dogs had re-settled themselves against and on Roo so that they were comfortable.

Roo looked to the bar, vision swimming. Whether it was from tears or hallucinations was anyone’s guess. Fingers tightened around the little package, turning bony knuckles light pink from the pressure. The give of the protein packed snack let him know it was real; it had to be. Just a real as the dog lapping his cheek, though that could just be a dingo getting ready to snack on him. That thought made him press himself into the wall again, cowering until Boomer wiggled further into him. If it was a dingo, it wouldn’t take its time nuzzling him. It was a dog. It was what he perceived. No tricks.

“A… alice? Who is she…?” An odd thing to say from an Australian native. However, Roo didn’t know anything but Junkertown. He had barely stepped foot out of it before being banned completely. Yes, he knew Australia was vast and had cities that were mostly untouched by the radiation but… names escaped him.

Boomer… boom, like an explosion. A short, manic tittering punctuated his panicked breaths, which were luckily slowing. The mention of royalty unfortunately made his shoulders stiffened. When had the Queen had a child? Did she… “She can’t have my arm!” He suddenly snapped. The rest of Jac’s questions seemed to fall on deaf ears as Roo glanced around for enforcers.

“Alice Springs--s’the biggest town in Central Australia. Bit north o’ here. Hasn’t really been touched by the fallout, eh? Kinda like a little oasis town an’ it’s a little tourist trap. People outside o’ the Outback like t’go there.” Jac was starting to hope that distracting him from his previous panic would help calm the poor thing. “The Arrernte people like me mum also call it Mparntwe. It’s got a really big indigenous population, y’know.” He was clearly... sheltered wasn’t the right word... but it was clear he’d been isolated in a similar fashion.

Jac was startled by his sudden outburst, but not surprised that it happened. She held up one hand while the other placed gently on Roo’s jaw, knowing full well what the repercussions could be. It wouldn’t have been the first time she’d been chomped on by a Junkrat. Probably wouldn’t be the last, either. Should he bite, she simply endured it, though with a sharp breath through her teeth. “Hey, hey! No one’s here t’take your arm, mate.” If she had to pick out what it might’ve been that set him off... It wasn’t Boomer. That had made him happy--leave it to a member of the Mischief, right? It had to be ‘princess’. She hadn’t even gotten the full ‘lapdog’ out before he’d snapped. “Y’worryin’ about the Queen? She ain’t here, mate, it’s okay. I was callin’ me dog that. I’m sorry. I won’t say it again.” Not until he’s calmer, with a clearer head, at the very least.

Roo flinched at the brush of fur, but slowly his organic fingers started clenching, threading through the softness. The texture definitely wasn’t what his body expected. It had readied itself for pain, to be struck or cut. Somewhere in his mind, he told himself the guards wanted his arm too… Though, last he remembered, none of the enforcers had that much hair. Hesitantly, his arms wrapped around Boomer, the warmth from the two pups helping bring him down.

When ​he detected fingers in his hair he flinched again, trembling, though he didn’t pull away. “D… don’t need ya pity,” he tried to hiss, but it came out as a whimper.

Unlike many Junkrats, Roo tried to be agreeable. It was a learned behavior from his childhood; if he was smiley and fun, the nuns didn’t mind him as much. It was easier to forgive a sweet boy of his wrongdoings than a hellspawn.

He looked down at the bar now in his hand. When had she given him that? “Y… you should keep it,” he thrust it back towards her. “I’ll jus’ chunder it up.”

“Hey, hey,” Jac said softly. “It’s okay. I ain’t here t’hurt ya. It’s okay. Wherever y’were ain’t where y’are.”

All the Rats seemed to think her kindness was pity... and she guessed she couldn’t blame them. “Ain’t pity. I don’t get it that bad, but I get the struggle. I don’t know what y’went through, but I know my Jamison had it rough for a long time.” Boomer licked at Roo’s face, making excited squeaking sounds as he wiggled further into the hug. Of the two, Boomer was the one more excitable about people. “It’s sympathy. Empathy. Y’know?” With that, she gave his hair a little ruffle before putting her hand back in her lap.

Roo remained completely oblivious that someone had found him having one of his episodes. The voices in his head were too loud, too persistent. However, when a damp nose touched him, he reeled back, head slamming into the wall he was curled up against. Ignoring the pain, his arms shot up to cover his face as if to protect himself from an assault.

Normally, Roo loved dogs, but right now he wasn't seeing them. His senses were betraying him, playing tricks on his mind to warp his perception. Cowering, his metal legs scuffed at the dirt, trying to press himself further into the wall and away from a wrongly perceived threat.

Boomer was startled by the bang, but ultimately only shifted his body back, his feet remaining firmly planted. While sometimes Jac had these episodes, they weren’t nearly so evident or severe, so it was easy to pick up on his distress. His tail swept low, but wildly, as he pressed his body against Roo’s skin, brushing astonishingly soft (for Junkers, anyway) fur against the pale, freckled skin.

Eliza slowly followed suit, though she was more keen to simply rest her head in the gangly thing’s lap.

fuk mate any of those dO sound cept the fruit. i gots a sugarie sweet tooth thing goin on rn. thinkin bouts raidin the fridge see if any dumbfuk left somthin behind :^0