Goth Angel

I’m tired of feeling alone

Well I was three months clean from sh but I relapsed last week. Sigh

I forgot to post a few days ago but I’m 2 months clean from sh 🫶

I hate insomnia so much I’ve hardly been sleeping lately

Congrats on 10 years that’s amazing!! Thank you so much!

Haha I wish I was talking about silent hill

I hate racing thoughts they trigger sh thoughts

I really wish I could hate you

I miss my person. I hope one day we’ll be together again but I know he doesn’t feel that way about me anymore. I want him to be happy and if that’s not with me then I just have to let it be. But I know in my heart I will always be waiting and it sucks. I’m happy we’re still friends but it’s hard at the same time. I’ll just separate my feelings and be the best friend I can be for him. That means healing myself.

I’ve been misunderstood my whole life I just wish at least one person could understand me. People only like me when I can give them something nobody loves the dark parts of me. I am a loner and I think I always will be. It’s better to be alone than to be misunderstood and criticized. I don’t think I’ll ever trust again. It breaks my heart when I finally trust someone and they just don’t get me. I can’t go through that again.

Im such a fuck up. I hate that my mental illnesses take over everything and I fear I can’t fight it anymore. I’m not strong enough anymore. I can’t talk to anyone either I’ll just be a burden. It makes me sick that I tried to open up to someone I trusted. I’m disgusted in myself. I’m a failure I don’t think I have a future. Please just let me disappear. I want to be with my dad and brother where I belong. Why did he leave me behind in this cruel world? I love my family and don’t want to hurt them but I just can’t keep going on like this. Life isn’t for me there’s nothing out there for me. I fought as long and hard as I could. I just hope I can be at peace soon. Sadly I don’t think these antidepressants will kill me anyways so here I sit and suffer.

I am severely depressed all I can think about is ending it. The thoughts are so strong even being with family doesn’t help much even though I love them so much. I think I’m going to admit myself if I can get a ride to the hospital

I’ve never even been drunk before but I’ve been having these cravings of just wanting to get shitfaced