Dimichu - #1 Reuben Price Hater

i hate the word spicy can we bring back calling things erotic

rolling up to Wendy's to get an erotic chicken sandwich

just thinking about how reuben price would react to the information that chip killed price's right hand man and then a vice admiral of raft with no hesitation. his little brother who betrayed him because he was forced to kill an 'innocent' man. and okay, maybe price can rationalise it by thinking crow and kuba kenta weren't exactly chip's definition of innocent, whatever that is, but then how would he feel learning chip has promised to be the champion of death, the human weapon who will kill, in theory, whoever death requires him to. price's naive and innocent little brother is well and truly gone. he might've begrudgingly respected the morals chip stuck to that price couldn't afford to have. now he barely knows the man who he once considered a brother. the champion of death cannot be the boy who turned on him all those years ago, the boy who refused to kill. the champion of death is a stranger

My revelation from earlier: i think dream smp is like. The opposite of slop. I think everyone's definition of slop is different but to me its media that doesn't stimulate any cognitive parts of the brain and is entertaining in the same way as a baby sensory video. Just shapes and colours and buzzwords. And that makes me infuriated that ive heard the dream smp called slop because the dream smp is the most gutwrenchingly beautiful story with the worst viewing experience known to man. Its a multiple-hundred-hour Minecraft roleplay thats functionally impossible to watch. The acting is amateur. The storytelling is clunky. The medium is unconventional and difficult to make immersing. The canon is inconsistent. The lines determining what IS canon are blurry at best. The writers and actors and designers and artists are a bunch of improv-ers who barely cooperate with each other. The plot is so good it will ruin your life. Its bad in every way except the way that matters, and the worst thing about it is that its good. That's why everyone who loves the dream smp talks about it like its the worst thing thats ever happened to them. Its the opposite of shapes and colours and no substance. Its all substance.

blast my stupid baja life

i tried explaining to this girl at a party once how i could be gay and asexual at the same time and it basically boils down to never being into anyone but like once a year i’ll find a man attractive. and she was like “so what am i if i only like girls, and i’ve never found any of my boyfriends attractive and and i just wanna do cocaine all the time?” i was like “you’re a lesbian with a coke addiction?” and she was like “woooooah”. she broke up with her boyfriend that night and had a threesome with two girls in the bathtub. rebecca if you’re out there, i hope you’re going places. well, not far, since you’re electronically tagged. but spiritually.

oh no!!!

my ribcage split open, revealing a grotesque, vertical maw, slavering and bleeding, with uneven rows of jagged and splintered ribs for teeth!!!

and prom is TOMORROW!!!

Stop calling me taylor swift

sleep is stolen time. don't let them take it from you anymore. tonight. we are staying up. til one billion o clock.