as requested by @ambitionbled (it wonât let me tag you, sorry!)
âHow much have you had to drink?â
âYou could have fucking alcohol poisoning!â Â
âEasy, there. Try to sit up.â
âI think I mightâve overdone it on the alcoholâŚâ
âWeâve got to go get your stomach pumped.â
âI thought you said you were clean!â
âYes, it is a big deal.â
âLet me drive you home.â
âYou are NOT driving like this!â
âYou are gonna have one hell of a hangover tomorrow.â
âDrinking until you puke is not normal.â
âIs this real life?âÂ
âI want to go to sleep but I canât find any sheep.â
âHow do you show fish affection?â
âTaco Bell is open 24 hours, right?â
âTequila is not my friend? YOUâRE not my friend.â
-glasses on head- âWhere did I put my glasses?â
âHow do I tell my parents Iâm a mermaid?âÂ
âIâm not even tired.â
âI should call my ex.â
âIâm not drunk enough for this.â
âDoes playing Mario Kart drunk count as drunk driving?â
-hugging the floor- âIâm trying to stop the floor from spinning.â
âCan we go out for fried chicken?â
âWhatâs the fucking point anymore?â
âScrew recovery. I want a drink.â
âIâm too sober for this shit.âÂ
âI donât give a shit what you think.â
âI seriously donât feel too good.â
âI didnât even have that much to drink.â
âWill you stop fucking interrogating me?â
âI can drive. Iâm fine.â
âThereâs a reason I drink so much.â
âYouâre the reason I drink so much.â
âIâm only happy when Iâm drunk.â
âYouâre cute, you know that?âÂ
âYou wanna get wasted?â
âIâm bar-hopping tonight, wanna come?â
âWhat are you drinking, and why arenât you sharing?â
âIâm having a party for two.â
âIâm usually too chicken-shit to say this, butâŚI really like you.â
âI donât want to kiss you with your alcohol breath.â