i will write a larger, more coherent post about ian one day, but for now i am rattling all these things together in my mind
him being the baby of the family, the middle child, and the older brother at different stages in his life
the intense disdain frank has for him that immediately marks him as different from the rest of his siblings
how that differentness follows him throughout his entire life and only gets worse and worse because 1) he's gay 2) he's not frank's biological son 3) he's bipolar 4) he's the only one who truly mourns monica
how he had goals and ambitions and was working hard to achieve them but he failed because of things outside his control
how he reached out to monica twice when his life was falling apart and the first time it led to him becoming an underaged sex worker living in a crack house with her (and yet she still abandoned him there) while the second time she took him to her boyfriend's place where he was running a meth lab (and that boyfriend immediately turned abusive toward ian)
that ian was so smart he tested out of one of his english classes and later passed his EMT exam with such a good score that his boss commented on it (presumably he also first-tried his GED like debbie before that)
the wild casting of his real dad even matching his height, something they could have never predicted
how ian deals with his problems alone, alone, alone because no one sees past his masking (until mickey)
how he rescues and changes the lives of two of terry's kids
how terry tries to kill him multiple times, never guessing that one day it would be ian left in charge of hiring his nurse
ian, reaching out for help for once in his life and asking lip for a place to stay. getting rejected. attaching himself to the first man who is nice to him. that man is married (he was doing his job). attaching himself to the next man who is nice to him (he was asking ian to play baseball). (ian living in the milkovich house of horrors, happy.)
ian counting the years he's been with mickey and it's every moment since he was 15, even the moments when he was with someone else
ian, cocky and bold, so easily played like a fiddle by mickey
the ultimate contradiction of ian: politely handing his crutches over to the person he's about to beat the shit out of
andulkaphoto
blakekathryn
vaporwave
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