The Underworld

Ok, so in the original Bram Stoker novel, sunlight is not lethal to Dracula. He just loses most of his powers. I'm bringing this up cuz I want a horror comedy where the hero, sensing dawn, tears off the curtains as a last-ditch effort only to have the vampire go "Aw shit, there goes most of my fancy powers. Guess I'll have to beat your ass the old-fashioned way" then proceeds to just deck the hero cuz a vampire at half-strength is still a fucking vampire.

$20 used to mean something

I know everyone’s seen the “Superman writes about lead pipes in metropolis” post, but has anyone considered Superman writing about endangered animals and conservation because he understands what it means to be one of the last of your species?

Ok but pls actually do this people. There is no such thing as a good person. Stop trying to be one and starting trying to do good instead

You deserve a love that doesn't confuse your nervous system.

retiring to your chambers >>>>>>

The older I get, the more I understand Calvin’s dad.