Cosmic Funnies

JVL
occasionally subtle
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
NASA
macklin celebrini has autism
Game of Thrones Daily
Stranger Things

ellievsbear
sheepfilms
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

Love Begins
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
Monterey Bay Aquarium
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

Origami Around

PR's Tumblrdome

Kiana Khansmith
seen from Kazakhstan
seen from United States

seen from Australia
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seen from Türkiye

seen from Malaysia

seen from Malaysia
seen from Nigeria

seen from Germany
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seen from Chile

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@deezyb

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cosmo tip #807
wanna spice up your sex life? hot pepper dick spicy hot sauce anus rectum buy me some jalapeno kettle chips
I always appreciate when celebrities speak up in reassuring ways. Dita von Teese is a burlesque star whose career depends on her appearance and her beauty. She has always been outspoken about looks and how to look and her diet and being full-figured as a means of being beautiful.
I love this quote from her because it asserts her power and capability to make her own decisions as a woman, something that not many women recognize they can do.
She is a serious idol!
Top: Jackie and Shar 1993
Bottom: Shar and Jackie 2009
Wow, the stars/creative forces behind lesbian classic ‘Hard Love & How to Fuck in High Heels’ are still going strong.
A wonderful alternative to the typical love triangle story.

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Let's Talk about Sex
I've always been surprised with just how many sex tips Cosmopolitan publishes and just how weird so many of them are. If magazines and newspapers rely on advertising these days, is the weirdness of their tips actually a perverse marketing ploy?
Anyone that has read Cosmo before can tell you about some of the tips they've come across. They are much more nonsensical than they are common sense. But some people may not know that. I keep imagining someone relying on these sex tips that they believe will wholly pleasure their partner.
What if Cosmo wanted someone to do this so that they could sabotage their love lives and continue to purchase more of the magazine because they believe knowing more their "love" and "sex" tips will actually help them!
A terrifying idea indeed. I believe there should be an alternative in Bust or Bitch to provide actual, sensual ideas to enhance the experience with your partner. Now that would be a publication I support!
Meanwhile, check out exxxpert tips and Tips from Famous Writers for dramatically better alternatives than what Cosmo boasts!
Azealia Banks
“Judgments” I took this last year, but in retrospect, I think it’s my strongest piece from high school.
Working on this project really made me examine my own opinions, preconceptions and prejudices about “slutty” women and women who choose to cover all of their skin alike. I used to assume that all women who wore Hijabs were being oppressed, slut-shame, and look down on and judge any woman who didn’t express her sexuality in a way that I found appropriate.
I’d like to think I’m more open now.
Advertising For Women by Women
http://www.upworthy.com/this-is-what-happens-when-advertising-is-done-for-women-by-women
[watch the video first]
I think this video is hilarious. Yes, it is corralling women in by exploiting the male body but this isn't something that's never happened before. As corny as this commercial is, I think it has something to say about the status of our advertising industry. I don't necessarily think it has the best thing to say about the industry -- "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em" -- but I think that the video creators were cognizant enough of the advertising environment to understand the merits of satire as a means to inform a large audience.

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What Do We Call Me
The question isn't what do we call me? My name is Diana, sometimes I go by D, I'll even go by Danielle if you are too drunk to actually remember my name.
Incidentally, while pondering the importance of Barbie dolls to my upbringing, I stumbled upon this.
Not unlike the weirdly fetishized things that many adults do to their Barbie dolls, online YouTube series "The Most Popular Girls in School" plays on the illusion, much like I possessed as a child, that Barbies can be real human beings with emotions and personalities.
TMPGiS takes this perception to an extreme. The creators of this series intensify the personas each Barbie toy comes with. The characters in this series are high school students who interact much like high school students do: rudely, honestly, brashly.
I appreciate that the creators decided to make a typical high-school drama using Barbie toys rather than real humans. With toys, the stereotypes can be discussed without taking into account the merits, their social lives, and/or opinions of the actor/actress themselves; the conversation can face solely on social constructs like gender and race.
An interesting decision by the creators was to use first, not to include any Barbies of color and also their choice to use Saison Marguerite (who appears in later episodes) a French-exchange student who plays up all the French stereotypes. The creators really go to town with her, but are we as viewers supposed to think its funny or get offended? Is playing up French stereotypes something that was already done to us by the Mattel industry, much like the Barbies of Puerto Rican and Mexican heritage Barbies, or are the creators purposefully doing this to be offense? Given Mattel's decision to include women of race and various ethnicities as products, the creators of TMPGiS effectively -- if not inadvertently -- comment on Mattel's poor cultural depiction of various races and by using Saison Marguerite, comment on Mattel's flaws in their choice.
Princess for a Day
Wake up in my perfect pink Princess bed. You’d think a bed like this implies I’m not doing much with my day, but I’m no slouch! I’m the multi-tasking queen, or as this bed implies…Princess. Look in the mirror, lipstick and eyeshadow still on! Looking great, girlfriend, this day is your oyster! After my hair’s done, nails done, everything’s did, here comes perhaps the hardest part of my day: whatever will I wear? It all depends on what tasks need a-doing. Put on my lab coat and I’m saving the world Scientist Barbie. Relaxed casual wear and I’m walking dogs along Malibu beach Barbie. Today, I think I’m going to teach kids how to live, how to be….I guess today I’m the live your life like you want to Barbie.
Crying Over the Milk Itself
I was getting the shiny, sparkly Steve Jobs of cell phones today because New Years was tomorrow and my family doesn't give gifts on Christmas or Hanukkah as a side effect of having grown up in the Soviet Union where those holidays weren't the most pertinent.
Anyway, I held on to that brick like a life jacket amidst a shitstorm and everyone in the store looked at me like I was textbook JAP. I'm not not a spoiled princess, having grown up by myself for close to 17 years but I'd like to give myself a little more credit than that, ok? The poor sales representative tried to cajole me into accepting the reality that my piece of shit phone was outdated and thus no longer cool but I couldn't help myself from crying and I couldn't figure out why I was doing so and no one else could either because I was getting the phone that every girl and her mom and/or stepmom coveted.
I guess this all started, the water works, when the sales rep told me that all of the voicemails and text messages I ever saved on my phone were going to be wiped to oblivion as soon as my new cell phone was activated. I guess thats when the mascara I bought months ago and refused to replenish because there was still particles left to use and I just didn't care enough about wearing makeup on a regular basis so it got crusty and now was tumbling down my cheek, one spider leg and line at a time. It wasn't even the phone, really, that I was so dependent on -- honestly I would happily go back to the silver flip phone that I accidently smashed when I broke my leg on an ice bank.
One of the messages was from a best friend (one of those best friends that you are only best friends with because you are actually secretly in love with them but you'll take what you can get,) possibly drunk on cheap vodka or whatever you could get when you were a teenager, telling me he missed me and I knew he was drunk off something horrible but every time I got sad or things got dark I would just listen to it because it was easier than talking to anyone when I had exactly what I needed right there to feel better. Another one of the messages was from one of my aunts, congratulating me on making it to 21 because honestly sometimes I didn't think I'd make it and needed to be reminded. I have messages from then-boyfriends and boy friends, nothing sappy, just hello's and how are you's and flits of flirtation in the voice that, when I was younger and stupider, I probably assumed meant a lot more than it actually did. Maybe a glitch in Verizon's server but I held onto these messages for years perhaps unconsciously holding onto the fact that each one of these messages simultaneously caused and eliminated the sort of suffering that I so often felt. But now they were attached to an object and this object was going to the shitter (otherwise known as being sold for $18 buyback which I promptly refused at the mere suggestion of the thought.)
Weepy stupor stood in the way of me refusing the teeny robot that was soon to have my name and phone number attached to it so it was mine now and I couldn't do anything about it except pawn it off to someone and make a big stink about it and probably upset my family who bought it for me and who I had finally come to good terms with because I was clean now and doing alright with my life.
Yea, I realize it is completely selfish and futile to complain about getting a new cellphone or that it could hold such an index to my happiness. It isn't the phone though, neither one of them. Not everyone can have phones and I'm lucky in that I can. But I didn't need it and I felt awful and still feel bad. Holding onto things, making idols out of material was creating suffering and I wept for the bump in this karmic cycle. Is suffering even possible in the digital age? With my old phone it no longer mattered what brand or type it was, that wasn't what brought me peace. It was the messages, texts, pictures, sounds bringing me happiness, reducing my suffering through feeling, emotion that I cared so much about maintaining. I wept when I realized I could still have it all regardless of whatever object projected it.
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I'LL EAT ALL OF YOUR SLICES IF YOU LET ME.
GOTTA CATCH EM ALL I LUV EVERY BITE

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming