Aartsdruïde

'Death is the failure of our parts Failure is just the death of dreams There's more to life than success But only death is real Career suicide is not real suicide, Career suicide is alright'

We all fail sometimes and not always because we are always incapable of doing the thing we seem to fail at, sometimes this thing can even be the easiest task possibly imaginable. Then why do we fail at them so badly sometimes? Well, there never is one answer to that question, though I know that from my own experience it mostly comes down to energy. How am I feeling? Did I sleep well? Did I eat well? Did something/someone discourage me today? Am I to distracted by something else, something that happened lately to focus? Have I taken the time to relax, go out? Do I simply have enough positive energy within me to complete the task laid before me, however easy it may seem? When the answer to that final question is no that's where we start to worry about our own qualities. We begin to ask ourselves that if we can't complete such simple tasks how can we ever complete more difficult ones? It begins to seep into our daily lives, filling them with self doubt. The thought that we could not do something as simple as washing the dishes, vacuuming our room or anything remotely simple because we didn't sleep well or felt a bit sick, maybe had a headache, bites away at us and can make for a drop in motivation and a sudden rise in stress. This stress makes for us to be even more susceptible to sleep deprivation (or oversleeping), depression, disease, drop in motivation or concentration and an all round feeling of self doubt that begins to fester even more. It affects the things we love the most, the things we love to DO the most, those things we are truly best and most passionate in doing. Even they seem to become a drag and when those things are what you'd like to base your future around seem to fail you as well you begin to doubt those dreams will truly become reality.

In the end it all comes down to situation, chance. Nothing is certain in life but death. Doubt is natural but also quite pointless when you begin to think about it. Though a life without doubt would probably not work out either. Doubt, as fear, is there to protect us from certain situations that seem to be endangering us. We just need to decide when to give in and when not to, when your doubts are valid and when there not. This of course is easier said than done for it is this same doubt that prevents us from making such decisions. Eventually when it overtakes our lives we can do nothing but come to terms with certain aspects of it, some things we will simply never be able to do because of it and that's okay as long as it doesn't kill us.

Career suicide is often the after effect of such self doubt. Deadlines are broken, work remains unfinished or a lack of passion is seen. When studying to become something you want to become you usually take a road you're not completely okay with. Some of the twists and turns, the over hill and under hill, through forest, mountain range or across the sea or whatever metaphor you may seem fit to explain the path you take, it's simply impossible to like everything about what you're doing in your studies and they will most definitely seem like a drag and have effect on your mood. Just know that whenever this feeling becomes to much to bear and you begin to doubt whatever you are doing that it is okay to give up. You certainly don't have to and I strongly recommend you to fight before you fall, but if it doesn't make you happy now it might never. There are always other ways to achieve your goals. The lacking of the right diploma does not equal the lacking of a certain skill. Modern society basses itself to much around the thought of someone having to prove themselves in a general sense. Companies, employers and schools want you to be perfect at everything all at once so that they don't have to put in to much effort. The fact of the matter is that no person is perfect and no one can excel at every possible task laid before them. Everyone has their qualities and yes these qualities usually become refined through education on certain subjects but that same education can also smother certain qualities you had because of other seemingly less interesting subjects. It's all a matter of who you are as a person, what you love, what you're passionate about. One person can be passionate about astrophysics, while the other wants nothing but to paint.

In art school there's also the problem of originality. When something isn't original it becomes bad, kitsch. I for one love myself a bit of kitsch. For example: Bob Ross, a brilliant painter in my opinion and someone who was truly passionate about what he did and wished to share it with the world. Now if I ever where to give up his name as a source of inspiration to any of my art teachers they would probably immediately roll their eyes. Why? Kitsch. 'What he does isn't original, it's kitsch.' Perhaps it is but does that make it any less worthy? Now I'm not one to dabble in the modern arts. As a matter of fact I despise most of it and find more pleasure in periods like the Romantic Era, the Renaissance, cultures like the Vikings, Native Americans, Mongols, Chinese, Japanese, Celts, Gauls, Aboriginals, Maori, etc, stretching all the way to the prehistorical ages (though many would say there's not much art there I tend to disagree as I find the making of simple tools and objects can be an art in and of itself). I do enjoy certain, more modern, artist though. Most of them being impressionists though, so still early modernists. Any who the point I'm trying to make is that kitsch works. People who already know what they like usually don't feel the need for something completely new. New? Sure, but that doesn't mean totally original and groundbreaking. I also don't feel the need to make stuff like that and those kind of projects where one constantly strives for originality instead of working with what is already laid before them just isn't for me. I like to work in certain ways, certain art styles and I usually know the story I wish to tell, I don't need to find it anymore. Stuff like research and experiments are all good and well, but sometimes completely unnecessary to come up with a good and finished product.

Repetition and cohesion in ones work are often a better way to success than constantly doing something different. That's just a fact. People know what they love and will usually stick to it because humanity is a very stubborn race. You just need to find whatever you are best at and excel in that other people seem to enjoy. I for one love making world maps, love drawing mythological or fantastical creatures, love making new worlds and writing about them. What I'd love to do is write my own books, make my very own mythology, my own encyclopedia to this universe in my head. 'Yeah but a lot of people already did that' Perhaps, but none of them could have possibly done it in the same way as me. Sure there will be similarities, but I strongly believe that one can't actually be completely original anymore. Everything has already been done, as far as our technology goes at least.