catch your breath breathe deep we got time

Hugs your pregnant fiancé and when I move away her stomach is deflated and she’s sobbing, and mine is full term and I’m smiling wickedly

certified iconic post

Obsessed with the old lady in the store I overheard say, "Well, you know me. I can't resist a gnome"

it is 1601. i am a 13 year old girl living in london. me and my schooling friends ask our parents for a penny go to see william shakespeare’s newest tragedy hamlet. during intermission we meet in the center of the cockpit and talk fervently about how hamlet and horatio are in love and analyze the dialogue from pervious scenes and decide that they are endgame. when hamlet gets stabbed with the poison foil we start screaming. horatio grabs the cup to drink poison and a mix of shock and exhaustion (i have been standing for 4 and a half hours) hits me so hard that and i fucking die right there

hey any other gays have to position your legs at odd and slightly uncomfortable angles for no reason while sitting in a chair of any sort

oh? you’re “fandom trash?” *compacts you*

Is this what we’re calling glomping now?

worst possible response to this. thank you.

It feels like fucking a ziploc bag full of juice you didnt miss anything good

why have i not unfollowed you

youre stupid

anyway hmu if u workin with this