Deadman7600

drink some watererrrr, please

but what if i have no mouth, what now, fish?

I can't believe fish is slendist

Babe wake up, my dbd main is based.

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the problem with tumblr spells is all of you lil sluts are casting and not giving it time to charge so you're all casting cantrips and not 9th level death spells. everyone wants to be the one to take them down no one wants to be the one who assists

Wait stop. everyone +like now and spread it a little but cast on the same day in August. lets try August 6th or something.

CAST NOW

did it work?

thank god vampirism is a flexible metaphor

it’s about being queer it’s about surviving assault it’s about alienation and most of all it’s about how everyone who loved you before might not be able to even look at you now, no matter how many times you try to explain that you didn’t ask to die and you didn’t ask for that death to leave you only half-eaten when it got bored of you.

the problem with tumblr spells is all of you lil sluts are casting and not giving it time to charge so you're all casting cantrips and not 9th level death spells. everyone wants to be the one to take them down no one wants to be the one who assists

Wait stop. everyone +like now and spread it a little but cast on the same day in August. lets try August 6th or something.

CAST NOW

Not the hero we need, but he sure is here.

Canon event: I got 2 out of 3

Thats a very sexy thing to do

attention acolytes! in order to maximize shareholder value, i will be turning all of you into gold statues, frozen in twisted spasms of pain for all eternity, in a great and lifeless mausoleum. we expect to eke out a marginal gain in Q3

And how does this increase shareholder value O Great and Powerful Dark One?

Obviously we can add the statues to our assets while also cutting down on employee expenses.

I see! This sounds like a sustainable business practice and I have no further questions.

yes! im so good at Company

I have a lot of pet peeves but I think the biggest one is when people say things like “oh it’s such a small town, only 35,000 people” like bitch my town has 200 people, you need to pick a new adjective 

According to Wikipedia, a small town is 1,000-20,000 people. So although you are correct in stating that 35,000 people is not a small town (it is a large town), you are incorrect in thinking that you live in a town. You live in a village. You are a villager.

I…… don’t know what to do with that information……a villager…

Quick, hide before the speedrunners get you

this is honestly such a good idea