That knife flip tho...

                                                    Matilda nodded and Jeff leaned over and squeezed her leg, “So, baby, we’ll see you next year.”

                                                    Matilda’s eyes grew wide. “That too long!” she complained.

                                                    Jeff chucked, “No it’s not.” He opened his phone and pulled up a calendar. “See”, he pointed to Dec. 25th, “This is today - Christmas. And next Sunday in 7 days it will be Jan. 1st 2023. Then on Thursday, Jan, 5th, we’ll be there to see you. So, even though I say we’ll see you next year, all that means is the next time we see you it will be the year 2023, not 2022, It’s not a whole year before we see you again. It’s only 12 days. Do you understand, baby?”

                                                   “Grammy, peas hold up hands.” Mirabella did as she was asked and held up both hands with her fingers spread.

                                                    Matilda counted her Grandmother’s fingers to 10, then counted her fingers as she held them up, “1…2. This many Gramps?”

                                                    “Exactly!” Jeff praised, “You are so smart!”

                                                    Y/N checked her phone for the text that just arrived, “Let’s go, Ducky. Daddy says the car service is outside.”

                                                      Everyone put their coats on. Mirabella carried Matilda, who was wearing her indoor shoes, along with the silver bell and Captain America. Y/N and Jeff carried the packages and suitcase. The front door opened and there stood the driver.

                                                    He bowed, “Merry Christmas, my Queen. Your chariot awaits.”

                                                    “Uncle Happy!!” Matilda yelled, “You here!”

                                                    “Yes I am. I came to take you back to the family house.” He returned her hug.

                                                   “Merry Christmas, Happy”, Y/N smiled, “This is very kind. You didn’t have to do this.”

                                                    “You sound just like the Captain”, Happy chuckled, “He said the same thing to me yesterday when I suggested this. But I wanted to do this. It’s Christmas morning and I wanted you both to have a warm comfortable ride back.”

                                                    “Thank you, Happy”, Y/N clasped his arm, “May I introduce my parents? This is my mom,  Mirabella L/N, and my dad, Jeffrey L/N.”

                                                     “It’s a pleasure to meet you”, Happy shook each hand.

                                                     “Mom, Dad, this is Harold Hogan, known to his friends as Happy”, Y/N smiled, “He’s one of Mr. Stark’s drivers.”

                                                      “So nice to meet you, Mr. Hogan”, Mirabella said.

                                                      “Please, call me Happy. Everyone does.”

                                                      “Then I insist you call us Mirabella and Jeff”, Mirabella chuckled.

                                                       “Well, Ducky”, Y/N chucked her daughter’s chin, “Say goodby to Grammy and Gramps.”

                                                        Happy took the suitcase and packages from Jeff and he and Y/N put everything in the trunk.

                                                        Matilda squeezed he grandmother tightly, “Thank you for all, Grammy. Love you.”

                                                      “Merry Christmas, my love”, Mirabella kissed her all over her face as Matilda struggled and giggled, “No, Grammy!” Mirabella stopped and placed 1 final kiss on her forehead, “Please give that to your dad and let him know we loved his presents.”

                                                       “I do, Grammy”, she promised. Her grandmother passed her to her husband. Jeff squeezed her tightly.

                                                        “I love you so much, baby”, he kissed her.

                                                         “Love you, Gramps”, she turned in his arms to look at her grandmother, “Love you, Grammy.”

                                                         “I love you too, my little love.”

                                                          She stayed in Jeff’s arms as they walked her to the car. Jeff buckled her into the carseat and Matilda grabbed his hand, “12 day, right, Gramps?”

                                                          “That’s right, baby. Just 12 days.”

                                                           “Promise?”

                                                           “Cross my heart”, he drew an X on his chest.

                                                            Y/N hugged and kissed her parents goodbye, climbing into the car. Happy was in the driver’s seat and he turned to look back at them. “There’s 2 blankets back there and a thermos of hot tea with 2 travel cups. The Captain wanted you to be comfortable.”

                                                          Matilda held up her new bear, “Look, Uncle Happy. Capn ‘Merica. Gammy and Gramps give me.”

                                                         He smiled, “That’s a wonderful present, my Queen.” He could imagine the Captain’s face. “You know, Matilda. It’s very early in the morning. If you’re tired, you could take a nap.”                                                         “No, Uncle Happy”, she protested, “No nap! Nap only in school.”

                                                       Happy looked at Y/N who chuckled. “I’m so sorry”, he blushed, “I didn’t know.”

                                                       “It OK, Uncle Happy.”

                                                       “Get comfortable. There shouldn’t be any traffic.”

                                                       Y/N placed a blanket across Matilda's lap and poured some tea into a travel cup for her. Matilda took a few sips and by the time they reached the Garden State Parkway, she was asleep.

                                                      “Little one? Little one, it’s time to wake up.” Steve nudged her gently. Y/N smiled, “She lasted from my parent’s home to the Garden State Parkway.”

                                                         Happy came behind her, “Is there anything you need from the trunk, Y/N?:

                                                    “Just a few things, Happy.” She joined him at the trunk and she took what she needed. Happy assured her he would drive her home tonight and help her with whatever she needed.

                                                    Steve unbuckled their daughter from her car seat, “Come on, little one. Everyone is waiting for us.” Finally, she blinked her eyes open. “There you are”, Steve cooed, “Did you have a good nap?”

                                                    “Silly Daddy”, she giggled, “No take nap. Only at school.”

 He chuckled as he offered to pick her up, “I’m sorry. I forgot.”

                                                     “Daddy”, she held up something in her hand, “Santa on Polar express give me for you.”

                                                     Steve crouched and accepted the gift. It was a small silver bell that looked like it came off a reindeer’s harness - the same as the movie. “Thank you, little one”, he shook it, listening for the jingle, “I love it. Thank you for thinking of me.”

                                                      “You welcome”, she reached for him and he gathered her to himself, “Did you have a good Christmas Eve with your Grammy and Gramps?”

                                                       “Yesh!”, she reached up and kissed her dad’s forehead, “That from Grammy. Say thanks for presents.”

                                                       “They were really touched by the presents, Steve, and they really liked them”, Y/N had come to stand beside Steve and Matilda.

                                                       “I’m glad”, he smiled, “Are we ready to go?” He started to close the car door. “Wait, Daddy!” Matilda tapped his chest, “Forgot something.”

                                                       Steve leaned down with her in his arms so she could grab something that was next to her car seat. He saw the shield first, his eyes going wide,

                                                       “Look, Daddy!” she held the bear up for her dad to see, “It Cap’n ‘Merica. Grammy and  Gramps give me.” She hugged the bear tight, “Cap’n ‘Merica best!”

                                                          He smiled, “He’s very nice, little one.” He looked over to Y/N who mouthed, “I’m so sorry.”

                                                         He closed his eyes for a moment. He could imagine the taunts from his family. There was nothing he could do. He nodded toward the elevator, “Are you ready? Everyone will be waiting for us.”

                                                        “Yesh!” Matilda confirmed and Y/N nodded. The little group made its way to the elevator.

                                                        As they rode up, Steve put Matilda down. She still held her new doll tightly. Steve leaned close to Y/N, “I  just want to say I’m sorry. I tried to reign them in. I really did…” His voice trailed off.

                                                        At first Y/N wasn’t sure what he was apologizing for, then her brain caught up - the Christmas presents. “How bad?” she asked.

                                                       Steve just repeated, “I’m sorry.”

                                                       As soon as the elevator stopped, Steve gave a soft, “Arooo!” Fergus sang as the door opened, “Aaarrrrooooo!” 

                                                      “Fergie!” Matilda shrieked. She wrapped her arms around his neck, “Merry Christmas, my Fergie!”

                                                        Steve crouched down and ruffled his dog’s fur, “Everyone is in the kitchen waiting for us, little one.” He looked up at Y/N, “I hope the two of you are hungry. Sam, Sarah, Laura, Tasha and Bruce have been cooking all morning.”

                                                       Y/N stroked her daughter’s hair, “Go on. Go say ‘Merry Christmas’ to everyone.”

                                                        Matilda charged down the hall, laughing wildly, Fergus on her heels. Steve and Y/N followed her. “I’m really sorry about the doll, Steve”, Y/N apologized again.

                                                      “It’s OK”, Steve assured her.

                                                      “No. I know how much teasing you’re about to get.”

                                                      Steve shrugged, “So, like every other day here.”

                                                      There was a roar from the kitchen as everyone greeted Matilda.

                                                      Steve could feel the butterflies in his stomach and he was sure Y/N was feeling the same. He hoped they could get past this, but when he spoke with this about Andie, she had proclaimed the dreaded words - It will take time. He shook his head and they joined everyone in the kitchen.

                                                      Bruce was waiting for them outside the kitchen. He tapped Steve’s shoulder and smiled at Y/N, “I know he's hungry, but I hope you and Matilda are. We kinda went overboard.” The smell of the food made Steve’s stomach growl and he blushed.

                                                    Bruce and Y/N giggled and she smiled, “It smells amazing!” The table had been expanded to include everyone. Matilda was already in her seat and there was a  unified greeting of, “Merry Christmas!” from everyone. Matilda was patting the seats next to her, “Mama! Daddy! So much food!” Her parents sat at the table, one on each side of her. Bucky had moved from his traditional seat to sit on the other side of Steve. Matilda reached for him across her father. “Uncle Bucky! Too far!” she complained.

                                                   Bucky was determined to not cause any friction today. It was the first Christmas Steve was celebrating with Matilda - hell, it was everyone’s first time. And he would not do anything to ruin it.

                                                    He wouldn’t look at Y/N, but took Matilda’s hand, “I’m right here, my Hobbit. But I was sure you would want to sit near your mom and dad.”

                                                    “OK”, she agreed as she sat back up.

                                                    “Sweet girl”, Natasha called to Matilda, “Is that a new stuffie?”

                                                    Steve closed his eyes as Matilda held up the doll, “It Cap’n ‘Merica. Grammy and Gramps give me for Chismas. Cap’n ‘Merica the best.”

                                                    Bucky nudged his best friend, “You hear that, Steve? Captain America is the best!” 

                                                    “He is the symbol of America!” Tony quipped.

                                                    “He shows us how to live up to the ideals of what America should be”, Natasha smiled.

                                                    “He is an inspiration to the whole world!”, Sam laughed.

                                                     “And he’s, oh, so handsome!” Laura cooed.

                                                     Steve was afraid to look open his eyes - he knew he was blushing.

                                                    His favorite voice in the whole world cut through the teasing, “He so good. Cap’n ‘Merica best!”

                                                     Steve held his hands up, OK. OK. Enough of the Captain America fan club. Let’s enjoy this food before it gets cold.”

                                                    The food was placed on the table. The cooks had really gone out of their way to make a feast. There were trays of scrambled eggs, bacon, sausage and ham. There were blueberry pancakes and Belgian waffles waiting for fresh fruit and whipped cream. There were cinnamon rolls and something Matilda had never seen.

                                                     “Daddy?” she asked, pointing at the triangular pillows of fried dough dusted with powdered sugar, “What those?”

                                                       “Those are beignets, little one”, he explained, “Aunt Sarah made them and they are the best.” Her eyes widened at this high praise from her father.

                                                    “Hey!” Sam glared at Steve, “I can make beignets.”

                                                     “But are they as good as mom’s?” A.J. nudged his uncle and Sarah turned her attention to her brother.

                                                      Sam shrugged, “Mine are good.”

                                                      “That’s not what he asked you, Sam”, Sarah smiled sweetly.

                                                      “No”, he admitted, “Yours are better, Sarah.”                                                       “Thank you”, she sat back, “There’s also Cafe du Monde coffee, Steve.

                                                      Steve rubbed his hands together while A.J. made a cup for him and Y/N. Both coffees were served as cafe au lait - strong coffee with steamed milk. It was the first time Y/N had ever seen Steve take milk in his coffee.

                                                     When the coffee was placed in front of him, Matilda exclaimed, “Daddy, chidren coffee. Has some, peas?”

                                                      “Not this coffee, little one.”

                                                       Cooper stood and asked, “Which littles want coffee?” Of course, every little hand went up. A.J. helped Cooper and soon everyone had their coffees.

                                                      The platters of food were passed around, everyone taking what they wanted. When the beignets made it to Matilda, she took 2, She couldn’t wait to try these. Sam got up and went to the stove. Sarah noticed that Cass hadn’t taken any food yet. She rubbed his back, “What’s wrong, ma chere? You don’t see anything you like?”

                                                  Cass looked over the table again, looking for something in particular. “Still thinking”, he shrugged, “Lots of choices.”

                                                 Sarah wrapped her arm around her son, “I know, ma chere.”

                                                 “‘Scuse me, Aunt Sarah”, Matilda raised her hand, “What mean?”

                                                 “Ma chere?” When Matilda nodded, Sarah explained, “It’s another way to say ‘my dear’’”

                                                 “Oh”, Matilda nodded wisely.

                                                 Sam had come back to the table and placed a plate in front of Cass, “Well, buddy. How about you start on this while you decide on everything else?”

                                                “Mom!” Cass’ whole face reflected his excitement, “It’s a rainbow bagel! It’s bacon egg and cheese on a rainbow bagel! It’s my favorite! Thanks, Uncle Sam!”

                                                 Sam sat down again, looking very pleased with himself, “Anything for my boys.” 

                                                 “You know, baby, you can get rainbow bagels in New Orleans.”

                                                 “Not the same, Mom.” Cass took a bite of his sandwich, a look of joy on his face.              

                                                  “They’re exactly the same”, Sarah protested.

                                                  A.J. and Cass looked at their mother and A.J. patted her hand. They spoke in unison, “You need New York water, Mom!”

                                                  Sarah looked over at her brother, safely seated between his nephews. “You corrupted my children, Samuel”, she teased.

                                                   Sam looked at both his nephews, “Samuel. I’m in trouble.”

                                                  The table burst into laughter and everyone began to enjoy their breakfast. Steve felt Matilda's tiny hand on his are. She giggled as she pointed to his plate, “Daddy? Has some, peas?”

                                                 Once breakfast was finished, the kids cleared the table in record time. Tony picked up Matilda and announced, “Let’s see if Santa came.” He led the children and adults to the closed Common Room. Still in Uncle Tony’s arms, Matilda looked at her parents. All the kids stood in front of Uncle Tony and all the adults looked his way as well. “Daddy!” She called as she held her bear. “Forgot to show!” She pressed the foot and Star Spangled Man with a Plan (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rtSrWn7eYbU) began to play. 

        Hiding his surprise, and embarrassment, Steve smiled. Their daughter was holding her Captain America doll high with a wide smile. He could see the sneaky looks the adults gave as Cooper and AJ stifled laughs. 

        Y/N let her head fall as she hid her wince. Leaning into Steve, she whispered. “I forgot about that. I’m so sorry.”

          Steve shrugged, knowing the damage was done and he would be teased for the near future about this. “It’s all right.” He said in a calm voice. 

          “I think that is an amazing song!” Tony exclaimed, knowing how he was going to use this already. He put Matilda down and waited until she stood between AJ and Lila. He began to pat his t-shirt before patting his pajama pants. 

          AJ, Lila and Cooper rolled their eyes and laughed as Cass and Nate began to get nervous. Matilda reached up and took AJ’s hand as her other arm held her bear. She could see Cass and Nate get nervous and that made her nervous. 

          “Oh, shoot.” Tony said as he shot a sympathetic look to the kids. “Uhhh… Hang on.” He held up a finger before turning to the door. Grabbing the door handles, Tony made a show of pulling. He grunted, scrunched his face up and put all his weight into his legs as he pulled. Releasing a breath, he grabbed the handles again before beginning to pull. 

           “Come on, Uncle Tony!” Nate called. 

            “You do it!” Cass encouraged. 

           Giving one last pull, Tony released the door and gave a huff. “Happy. Do you have the keys?”

             “No sir.” Happy shook his head. “You wanted to keep it for safekeeping.” 

            “Uncle Tony!” Cass exclaimed. “Presents!” He pointed at the door. 

           Tony pouted. “I know…” He said as he let his head hang. “But the doors are locked and neither Happy or I have the key.”

             “Uncle Tony! You open!” Nate exclaimed as he and Cass began to bounce. “Has to open!”

         “I’m sorry.” Tony rested his hands on his hips and sighed. “But we can’t get in there. So…” He met each child’s eyes. “I think Christmas is canceled.”

            Nate and Cass let out annoyed yells, immediately protesting. Matilda squeezed AJ’s hand. He bent down and spoke. “It’s OK. Uncle Tony is teasing.”

            “Yeah?” She whispered. 

           “Yeah.” AJ nodded. “He will give us a reason in a second.”

            As if on cue, Tony spoke. “I was hoping the door would be unlocked but maybe this is better.” He sighed. “I got a call from Santa last night. He was very upset. Rudolph got drunk and couldn’t lead the sleigh. He cried as he told me he had to cancel Christmas this year.”

                “Nnnnnnooooooo!!!” Cass and Nate screamed. They ran to Uncle Tony and Uncle Happy to begin to pat them down. They were determined to find the missing key. 

                “See?” AJ laughed with Cooper and Lila as he spoke with Matilda. “Last year’s excuse was Mrs. Clause grounded him.”

                 “But…: Matilda wrinkled her brow. “Santa came last year.”

                 “Yes he did. Uncle Tony is just joking.”

                  Looking at her uncle, Matilda called. “Uncle Tony! You has Key!”

                  “No, I do not.” Tony protested. “Happy! I thought you had the key.”

                 “Wait a moment.” Happy thought as Nate continued to pat his legs. “I think I saw the key with Ms. Alpine. She took it.”

                 Bucky wrinkled his brow. “Don’t blame my beauty!” He playfully protested. 

                “Look, I know you think the cat is the best thing in the world.” Tony said as he looked at Bucky. “But I know better. I know she sneaks things when no one is looking.” He continued as Bucky began to protest. “Baby Cap. She sneaks Fergus’ treats! I’ve seen it.”

                 “Uncle Bucky!” Matilda exclaimed as she turned and made AJ jump. “That no nice!”

                  Fergus looked at his hooman as she yelled. 

                 “I promise you, Hobbit, Alpine is a lovely lady.” Bucky rested his hand on his chest as he spoke. 

                 “Sorry I.m late!” Jac came jogging up. She stopped in front of Tony and took a moment to catch her breath. “Oh, hello!’ She waved at everyone and caught Matilda as she ran up to her. 

                   “Merry Christmas!” Matilda exclaimed as she squeezed Jac. “I no see you long time!”

             “I know. I had to take some time off for family.” Jac explained. 

             “All OK?” Matilda asked with concern.  

             Jac nodded as she gave a warm smile. “Everything is better now. Thank you for asking.” She said hello as Matilda introduced all her cousins and her aunts. “Hello.” She waved. 

            “Jac best!” Matilda declared as she was placed back on her feet. “She first friend that not aunt and uncle!”

            “Thank you for that.” Jac spoke to Matilda before she turned to Tony, producing a key from her pocket. “You asked me to hold this for you.” She smiled as she handed it over. 

           I believe I did.” Tony said. 

          “Jac is a hero!” Lila declared. 

          Looking at her in mock shock, Tony turned to Matilda. “Hear that, Baby Cap?” His voice filled with fake outrage. 

          “It OK.” Matilda soothed. “More than one hero OK.” She held up a little finger. 

          “OK.” Tony conceded as he turned to the door. He unlocked it and placed the key back in his pocket. He turned back to the family before he opened the door. His tone became serious as his face became content. “I love you all. Merry Christmas.” He opened the doors and quickly moved to the sides as the kids ran in.  

         Matilda ran after her cousins, eyes locked on a sea of Orange. She stopped and hit her knees in front of it. She knew all of these were for her. After all, orange is the best color. 

        Y/N froze as she saw the sea of presents waiting for their daughter. She felt her muscles stiffen as she looked at them. Matilda had been given so many new things this year. Looking at the pile now, Y/N wondered where it would all fit. Steve had told her he had spoken with the family. Maybe he wasn’t as firm as he should have been. Unless the family didn’t listen. 

        Steve saw her freeze. He felt a pit open in his stomach. He knew it was a lot of presents and he had tried to get the family to pair down. Leaning into her space, Steve whispered. “I’m so sorry.”

          “It’s OK.” Y/N whispered back as she shook her head. 

         Bruce walked over. He had seen Y/N’s face and was concerned about her reaction. “Hey…” He nudged Y/N’s shoulder as he offered a cup of coffee. “I know it’s a lot. But, in the spirit of fairness, Matilda got the exact number of presents every other child got.”

           Looking at their daughter again, YN allowed her eyes to look at the other children as they opened their gifts. Even AJ and Cooper had the same amount of presents. “I suppose you’re right.” 

           Breathing a sigh of relief, Steve sent Bruce a thankful look before Bruce walked away. “Shall we go sit with Matilda?” Steve asked.

             Getting to the end of the dining room table, Y.N stopped as she noticed what was waiting there - three Stark Tablets, three cases for said tablets and a Stark Phone. “Steve?” She asked. “Who are these for”

             “Maddie, Nessa and Ronnie. The phone is for Ronnie as well.” Steve explained. “Matilda and the girls will need tablets starting next year, Ronnie gets a new tablet and phone.” He picked up one of the cases for the tablets. “Look at this.” He smiled. 

              Matilda squealed when she found the case. She held it high above her and yelled. “Mama! Daddy! It Mikey!”

              The two of them nodded and laughed. The case was solid green rubber. On the back was the turtle mask, in Matilda’s case, was Mikey orange. What she did not know yet was the mask pulled out a bit so the tablet could stand on a desk during school and homework. Maddie and Nessa had their favorite turtle masks on the back of theirs. Ronnie had a black cartoon cat on her tablet case. Steve was later told it was JiJi from the movie Kiki’s Delivery Service. It was one of Ronnie’s favorites. 

              “I think it’s great that Tony is giving them tablets.” She looked over to see Lila opening her tablet and case. “They do need it for school.” She chuckled at Steve’s wince. “I know. But, unfortunately, they will need it for school.”

               Rolling his eyes, Steve saw Matilda looking at the case. She had not even gotten to the actual tablet yet. All the other kids had unwrapped their cases and tablets. AJ and Cooper also got new phones. “I don’t see why it’s needed…” He muttered. 

                The kids gave out their presents after the initial unwrapping destruction had happened. Cooper and AJ had purchased gifts and handed those out. The littles? They took great pride in handing out their homemade gifts - Nate made hot chocolate spoons with marshmallows and everyone’s favorite candies on the ends, Lila picked notebooks, pretty pens and stickers for each person. She wrote a personalized message onto the first page of each book for it’s owner. Cass, with the help of his mother and AJ, picked a tiny picture of a small animal from the Bayou for each person. He then suspended those pictures in resin (in an alphabet mold to match the first letter of each person’s name) with glitter backgrounds. The resin keychains were a hit. 

                Matilda ran to each adult and child and handed them her ornaments. Steve came in behind her to describe what the picture was since it seemed no one understood. 

              Aunt Sarah understood. She was the last to get her ornament. She was good with that. She got to hold her niece for a bit. She kissed Matilda’s hair and thanked her for the ornament. Studying it for a beat, Sarah asked. “Is this a sunset?”

                Lighting up, Matilda eagerly nodded. “You know!”

               “Well…” Sarah smiled. “It looks like a beautiful sunset.”

              “No pretty like you.” Matilda said. 

              Feeling embarrassed, Sarah shook her head. “Thank you for saying that.” 

             “It true.” Matilda kissed her aunt’s cheek before being asked to be let down. She ran to her parents. “You turn!” She declared as she ran to the tree and came back with two very similar shaped boxes. “Open same time, peas!” She requested. She quickly ran to get her Captain America Bear as she sat on the floor in front of them. She was very proud of these presents and she wanted to get the full reaction. 

              Y/N pulled her tumbler from the box. The tumbler was covered in soft pink, her favorite color. On the back of the tumbler was a picture of Neil and Terry on the day they came home, both sitting on the couch - Neil right next to Terry - both looking at the camera. Turning the tumbler, Y/N found the picture of her and Matilda- taken by Ryan in the bookshop after closing hours, Y/N sat behind the register, feet tucked under the desk allowing her to lean back in the chair. Matilda laid against her chest. Matilda’s face caught in mid laugh as Y/N kissed the top of her head. Feeling herself tearing up, Y/N made a decision to not cry. She did not want to cry right now. Even if it was the best gift their daughter had given her. She moved to put the tumbler down when something caught her eye - orange words in Matilda’s handwriting - Ducky’s Mama.

                  Steve pulled his tumbler out at the same time. He was surprised to get one, thinking this was an idea strictly for Y/N. He was thrilled to be proven wrong. Dark blue covered the tumbler. The box opened to a picture of Fergus, laying on the common room floor after a long day of running around. Steve remembered Natasha taking that picture, trying desperately to get Fergus to be animated. All she got was a sleepy stare. Turning the tumbler, Steve found the picture Matilda picked. It was no secret Bucky came over some mornings in their apartment before Matilda went to school. He must have caught this moment on a particularly early morning- Steve in the living room of his apartment, a sleepy Matilda laying against him, as he softly swayed to wake her up. He, like Y/N, swallowed his tears down. He had not seen the message on Y/N’s cup. His message caught him by surprise. In the same handwriting, and orange color, were the words ‘Little One’s Daddy’.  

      Matilda looks with wide eyes as both parents began to cry. Before she could ask why they were crying she felt herself being lifted onto the couch. Both of her parents engulfed her in a hug. "What matter?" She asked. 

       "Nothing." Steve said as he kissed her hair. "Happy tears."

       "This is the best present." Y/N praised as she kissed Matilda’s cheek. 

       Snuggling deeper into her parents hold, Matilda whispered. "Love both."

              All the presents had been opened, and enjoyed. The adults collected all the discarded wrapping paper. “Baby Cap”, Tony called, “Would you come here, please?”

                                             She ran to him, giggling, her Cap bear bouncing in her hand, and he crouched to catch her. She hugged him tightly, “What need, Uncle Tony?”

                                            He was holding a small box, “Well, every year we give each of our kids - Cooper, A.J., Lila, Cass and Nate - a Christmas ornament to hang on our tree. They hung them last night as we always do. But I think next year we’ll change it to Christmas morning, so you can do it together. But, this morning, I have your first ornament.” He presented the box to her.

                                            Opening it, she found an ornament with her name on top, followed by all the other kids' names and at the bottom, the year - 2022. Her eyes widened, “So pretty. Thank you, Uncle Tony!”

                                      “You’re welcome. Would you like to hang it?”

                                       Nodding, she took his hand and together they found the perfect spot.

                                     Matilda ran to her mom, “Mama! I do!”

                                     “I see, Ducky”. Y/N hugged her daughter.

                                     Still in her mother’s arms, she held her hand out to her dad, “Dadd, I do it!”                                     Y/N passed her to Steve, “Good job, little one.” He put her back on her feet and she ran to join Lila and the other children.”

                                    Each child was playing with one of their toys, while A.J. and Cooper were bust setting up their tablets. The bags of used paper were collected and Tony cleared his throat, “OK, I have one more present for everyone.” He and Happy handed out the boxes. Once opened, everyone discovered a beautiful pair of snow boots.

                                               “Would everyone please try them on?” Tony asked. “I think I got your correct sizes, but I’d like to be sure.”

                                               Everyone, including Tony and Happy, obliged. Nate and Matilda needed help tying their boots. Thankfully, all the boots fit perfectly.

                                             “I have an idea”, Tony smiled, “I’d like us to take a family picture. We haven’t taken one for a long time.”

                                              “That’s a great idea”, Bruce praised, “Shall we take it in front of the tree?”

                                              “Well”, Happy was thinking out loud, “We’re all wearing snow boots. We could go outside.”

                                               “How about the courtyard?” Bruce suggested.

                                               “That sounds perfect!” Tony smiled, “Why don't we get our coats and gloves and we’ll meet at the elevator?”

                                                The littles had to be convinced to leave their presents, but, eventually, everyone had their coats on and were gathered in front of the elevator. Even Fergus had his coat and boots on. Steve was thankful the salesman at the pet store had advised spending time everyday with the boots on Fergus. This way he could get used to them. And now, Fergus wore them like a champ.

                                           The elevator doors opened and there stood Tony in his coat. He held the door opened as everyone got on. It was a tight fit, but they were able to ride the elevator together. They approached the courtyard, but it was dark. No one could see inside.                                 “Um, Tony”, Happy chuckled, “It’s too dark for a picture.”

                                           “What do you mean it’s too dark? The sun is out today.” He made his way to the front of the group. Seeing the problem, he blushed, “Sorry. Forgot to open the sunroof.” He lifted his eyes to the ceiling, “Friday, please open the sunroof.”

                                              “Of course, Mr. Stark.”

                                              They waited for a few moments, then the sound of grinding gears. Everyone was surprised. Tony hung his head, then Friday reported, “I’m sorry, Mr. Stark. I am unable to open the sunroof.”

                                              “Dammit!” Tony snarled. He turned to his family, “I’m sorry. Just give me a minute. I have to go in and open it manually.”

                                              Before Steve could volunteer, Bruce stepped forward, “Hold on, Tony. Let me help.”

                                             Tony smiled his megawatt smile, “Thanks. Bruce. Just give us 2 minutes. And get those smiles ready.” The 2 men entered the courtyard. Happy had positioned himself closest to the door to ensure it closed all the way. He didn’t want Tony and Bruce’s surprise ruined.Fergus snuggled next to Matilda, feeling her nervousness.

                                            Within a few minutes, the lights came on in the courtyard and the family was speechless. Inside the courtyard it was a winter wonderland - snow everywhere and still gently falling from the ceiling. Happy opened the door but no one moved. A.J. and Cooper nudged the littles and it was like they turned a switch on. The littles shrieked in unison and charged into the courtyard, running straight for Tony and Bruce. Sarah got her phone out quickly, snapping pictures of Tony and Bruce catching the littles. The glow of happiness that surrounded the 2 men needed to be preserved.

                                           The rest of the family entered the courtyard to hear the littles praising their uncles - this best, Uncle Tony! You do, Uncle Bruce! Thank you, Uncle Bruce! Thank you, Uncle Tony! Can play?”

                                          “Yes we can play”, Tony affirmed. The littles scattered and the adults helped them make snow angels and snowmen. Fergus bounded into the courtyard, diving into snowbanks and rubbing snow all over himself. Matilda was working with her mom on a snowman when she spotted her Uncle Bucky. “Be back, Mama”, she assured and she ran to her uncle. Bucky crouched to catch her, kissing the side of her face, “Having fun, my Hobbit?”

                                             “Yesh!” she declared. She tapped his chest, “Uncle Bucky, ‘Pine come play?”

                                              “I don’t know if she likes snow”, he explained.

                                              “Should try?” she asked.

                                              Bucky pondered the question. “You’re right, Hobbit. She should try. I’ll go get her.” Matilda returned to her mom and the snowman building, but she kept her eye on the door, waiting for Bucky to come back with Alpine.

                                             Bucky went to his room finding Alpine sleeping on his bed. He sat next to her and gently stroked her fur, waking her up, “Hello, beautiful.” Alpine gave a big stretch and a yawn and crawled into his lap, accepting all the love he would give her as her due. “We’re gonna try something new today, Beautiful”, he explained, “Do you trust me?”

                                             Alpine purred and rubbed her face against his chin. He picked her up and carried her to his dresser, pulling out a sweater for her. She surprised him by cooperating as he put her sweater on. He carried her to the courtyard, holding her close. He stood still for a while, holding her tight while she lifted her head and sniffed, her eyes wide. Matilda saw him and yelled, “‘Pine!” The littles charged Bucky, but he put his hand up. “Wait”, he asked, “This is new for her. Let her get used to it.” The littles stopped and waited, eyes wide with anticipation. Once Bucky felt Alpine relax a little, he crouched down and took a bit of snow on his hand, offering it to his cat. She sniffed it and licked it, but didn’t seem disturbed. He placed her on snow free pavement, letting her make the decision. She paced and watched the snow, eventually placing 1 paw in it. She retracted it immediately. She walked a little further and tried again, retracting her paw just as fast. She repeated this two more times. Bucky was sure if she just took the plunge, she would be fine. The next time she went through her little ritual, Bucky nudged her gently from behind, pushing all four of her paws into the snow. She froze, then turned and gave him a look of utter betrayal.                                          

                                       Realizing his mistake, he crouched behind her, “I’m sorry, beautiful. Come on. I’ll take you back to our room.”  He reached for her, but she bolted away. The littles cheered thinking Alpine was playing, but her tail was fluffed out - a sure sign she was not pleased. He called her, but she kept running - straight at Steve. 

                                       “Alpine, No!” he yelled. He didn’t want her clawing Steve or anyone else because he had angered her. Steve heard Bucky yell and could see the cat charging him. “Better”, he thought, “she scratched me than 1 of the kids.” He crouched down to catch her hurtling form and prepared himself for her claws. Surprisingly, she crawled into his arms with her claws retracted. Her eyes were wide and she was shivering, giving the most pitiful meows. He wasn’t sure if she was cold, scared or both. He tucked her inside his coat as the littles and Bucky came up to him. 

                                         “It OK, ‘Pine. Snow is fun”, Matilda explained.

                                          “I don’t think she likes it”, Bucky said. Looking at Steve, he asked, “Did she scratch you?”

                                          “No, she didn’t”, Steve smiled, “But I don’t think the snow is for her.”

                                           “I agree.” Bucky waited while each child stroked Alpine and assured her it was OK. Steve and Bucky stood and Bucky took Alpine from Steve, “See, young lady. You’re mean to him and he rescued you when you needed help. I hope this changes your attitude about him.”

                                            “I agree, Alpine”, Steve spoke gently, “How about a peace treaty?” He reached slowly for her and she stretched her head forward, meeting his hand and purring as he pet her. Steve exchanged a glance with Bucky, “Let’s hope this holds.”

                                             “Come on, beautiful. I’m sorry I subjected you to this. Let’s get back to our warm room.” After assuring the littles he would be back, he took Alpine back to their room.

                                               Matilda went back to building the snowman with her mama. Tony and Sarah were making snow angels with Lila. Bruce and Laura were building snowmen with Cass and Clint and Happy were building with Nate. A.J and Cooper were together, looking at their phones and talking. Steve and Natasha were watching the kids together. When she was done with the snowman, Matilda thanked her mom and charged her father. Steve scooped her up as soon as she was near enough. She kissed his cheek, “Hi, Daddy!”

                                          He chuckled, “Hi, little one. Are you having fun?

                                          “Yesh!” Staying in her dad’s arms, she turned back to her mom, “Mama, peas come.” Y/N smiled and walked up to the little group, taking her Ducky’s hand. Natasha giggled, “Cold, yet?”

                                          “A little, but they’re having so much fun,” Y/N smiled, “It’s amazing what Bruce and Tony have done.”

                                           “It was”, Natasha said, “I wonder how long it took them to arrange this.”

                                            “Not long”, Steve looked up at the gently falling snow, “Once those 2 put their minds to something, miracles happen.”

                                             Both women agreed. Natasha stretched and rolled her shoulders, “I know you’re a human furnace”, she teased Steve, “But if I want to keep warm, I have to walk around.”

                                            Steve looked confused - he could still feel the cold. Y/N giggled at him and kissed Matilda’s hand, “Ducky, you came to Daddy because you wanted to get warm.”

                                           “Nooooo”, she exaggerated her response, “Love my Daddy.”

                                           “I know you love your Daddy - very much, but you also wanted to get warm.”

                                             Matilda blushed and giggled. “Yesh”, she whispered, “Love Daddy and he warm.”

                                            Steve chuckled and Bucky came back in - minus Alpine. He was looking around to see which group he should join when suddenly, he was hit in the face with a snowball. He sputtered, spitting snow out of his mouth. Looking around, he saw Natasha tossing another snowball up and down in her hand.

                                            “You did NOT just hit me with a snowball!” he glared at Natasha. Again he was hit - this time in the back of the head. He heard Bruce’s voice, “And I just hit you with a snowball! Are you just gonna stand there, Barnes?”

                                           “No. I’m not!”. He reached down and scooped a large snowball, throwing it impossibly fast, directly at Steve. He didn’t realize Steve was holding his Hobbit, but watched as Steve turned his back, taking the snowball in the back of his neck. He passed Matilda to her mother and said, “Run”. Steve scooped snow and Bucky was already moving, but instead of returning fire, he spun and threw 2 snowballs at Cooper and A.J.

                                          “Hey, Uncle Steve!” A.J. yelled, “We were just standing here.

                                           “Then you better move!”,Steve challenged as he scooped up more snow.

                                            It became a free for all - everyone laughing and throwing snowballs. The littles - Matilda, Nat and Cass - couldn’t throw very far, so they would try to sneak behind the adults and smash snowballs into their legs. That always resulted with the offending little being grabbed and tickled until they were rescued by someone else or begged for mercy. Fergus was energized by the excitement running through the courtyard. He ran, chasing anyone who was close to him.

                                           Tony threw 2 snowballs, each hitting their intended targets - one for Happy and one for Lila. They turned to face Tony, outrage etched on their faces. 

                                            Tony laughed, “You think I forgot the nerf war on Thanksgiving? You 2 hunted me!”

                                            “We’re gonna hunt you again!” Lila declared!

                                            Snowballs were flying everywhere. Fergus was hit twice before he started trying to catch the snowballs in his mouth. Y/N got Sarah, but was immediately hit in the back of the legs by Cass smashing a snowball, “No hit my Mama!” he declared.

                                          “Then I’m going to get you!”, she lightly packed a snowball and was about to throw it at him when Lila hit her, “Run Cass!” she yelled.

                                          Cooper and A.J. were stalking Steve, but the super soldier was able to easily dodge the snowballs. Above the din of shouting and laughter, Bucky’s voice rang out, “WATCH OUT, BOYS. THAT’S THE STAR SPANGLED MAN WITH A PLAN!”

Steve dropped his head, froze for a split second and he was hit by snowballs thrown by A.J. and Cooper - 2 apiece.

                                          “Thanks, Uncle Bucky!” they yelled as they retreated before Steve could retaliate. But Steve had a different target in mind. Bucky saw the look in his eyes and ran.

                                          The noise - the laughter and the yelling - had drawn the attention of the agents working today and they gathered at the windows, watching the battle. Sam was the first to notice them. He gathered Cooper and A.J. and pointed to the windows. They began throwing snowballs, startling the onlookers. The rest of the team joined in - once in a while throwing snowballs at the windows. They all took great pride when they would startle one of the agents and cause them to take a step back from the windows.

                                            Clint was trying to silently stalk Natasha, but at the last moment saw his wife - her attention was focused on Bruce. It was the perfect opportunity. Using his extremely fast reflexes, honed from years of shooting his bow, he threw 3 snowballs rapid fire - all 3 directed at his wife. “CLINT!” she shrieked. Lila was outraged that her mother had been so heinously attacked. She ran toward her father. Tony saw her and ran to scoop her up, whispering, “Shhh” into her ear. He carried her to her father as quietly as he could, but he needn’t have bothered. Clint was helpless with laughter at his wife’s outrage. Tony was able to get behind him so Lila could smash 2 snowballs, one on either side of her father’s face. Clint shook himself like a bear, wiped tears from his eyes and hit Tony with a snowball he had been holding. Tony was stunned as he, laughingly muttered, “No good deed goes unpunished.”

                                              A.J. and Cooper were hiding behind a snow wall they had built. They had planned to use this as protection as they tossed snowballs at everyone. Fergus danced back and forth in front of the snow wall trying to catch the snowballs. The boys were pinned down by Sarah, Bruce and Steve and hadn’t been able to throw 1 snowball. They came up with a Hail Mary plan and after a contest of Rock, Paper, Scissors, Cooper ran out as a decoy while A.J. prepared. As soon as Cooper began to draw fire, he stood to throw a snowball and was hit with 2 - one after another, courtesy of his mother. She laughed at his startled face. “A.J…son”, she laughed, “You and Cass always try to do this when we’re here in NY when it snows. You gotta come up with a better plan. Now, I suggest you run!” A.J. scrambled to his feet and took off, taking 2 more snowballs in the back from his mom.

                                             Matilda was running and shrieking with delight. Suddenly, she saw her mama grinning at her and gathering snow. She spun around and ran as fast as she could. Her mother threw a snowball over her head. She shrieked again as Y/N prepared another snowball. Suddenly, Matilda yelled, “Uncle Bucky! Help!” Bucky spun instantly and ran toward his Hobbit. Fergus heard his little hooman yell and paused, looking for the threat. Matilda did not realize her mother had frozen when she called Bucky. Matilda continued to run toward him and yelled, “Mama! No get me!” Bucky saw Y/N with the snowball and was unsure what to do. Realizing the tension, Bruce took off to intercept Matilda. Once he saw Bruce coming out of the corner of his eye, Bucky “tripped” in the snow and fell face first. “Oh, NO!” Matilda cried when suddenly Bruce caught her just as Y/N threw her snowball. He spun with her in his arms, taking the snowball in the back, and falling into the snow with her on top of him. Bucky stood and dusted himself off. Y/N caught his eye and mouthed, “Thank you”. Bucky nodded. Matilda was sitting on Bruce’s chest, “Thank you, Uncle Bruce. You OK?”

                                             “Baby girl, is that you? Did I save you”, Bruce moaned. Matilda got nervous, “You OK, Uncle Bruce?” He realized he was scaring her so he smiled and sat up, cuddling her. “I’m OK, babygirl’, He chuckled, “I was just teasing you. I didn’t mean to scare you.” “It OK, Uncle Bruce”, she sat back a little and gave a big stretch and a yawn. Looking around, Bruce could see all the littles were yawning. He stood with Matilda in his arms and called, “I don’t know about the rest of you, but I need to warm up with some hot chocolate.” Everyone agreed this was a great plan.

                                               Once in the elevator, Laura took charge, “OK, Lila, Nate, Matilda and Cass, you all need a quick wash off and clean pajamas.” The 4  littles voiced their displeasure, but Y/N and Sarah backed Laura up. It was decided the moms and Clint would clean up the kids, while everyone else made hot chocolate and snacks. Steve dried Fergus with a warm fluffy towel. Once the kids were cleaned up, they were carried back to the common room. There were slices of fruit and cheese and mugs of hot chocolate. Everyone knew the littles were tired. They sat quietly sipping the chocolate. Soon, their little heads were nodding. Steve stood and picked up Matilda, followed by Sam getting Cass, Tony getting Lila and Bruce getting Nate. All 4 littles protested they were not tired. “Little one”, Steve explained, “Why don’t you lay down under some blankets so you can warm up.”

                                              “But want to stay with Lila, Cass and Nate”, she protested.

                                               “We want to watch a movie”, Lila whined.

                                               “Christmas movie!” Nate yelled.

                                               “Movie together”, Cass added. 

                                                “OK”, Steve sighed, “How about this? All four of you will lay in my bed with Fergus and watch a movie and warm up. Then you can come out and we’ll play some games.”

                                                 The children agreed and the men started walking down the hallway, Fergus training behind. 

                                                 Cass tapped Sam’s chest, “Uncle Sam, no nap!”

                                                 “I no sleepy, Daddy”, Matilda yawned.

                                                  Bruce chuckled, “No one said anything about a nap. You’re going to watch a movie.”

                                                  They were outside Steve’s room when Lila hugged Tony, “No tricks, Uncle Tony. We don’t need a nap.”

                                                  Tony laughed, “We haven’t said anything about a nap. What movie do you want to watch?”

                                                  “The Santa Clause!” Nate yelled. All the kids agreed and soon they were all tucked into Steve’s California King size bed with plenty of room. Sam looked to the ceiling, “Friday, please play ‘The Santa Clause’ here.”                                                   “Of course, Lieutenant.”

                                                   Fergus jumped in bed with the kids and the men left, leaving the door opened a crack.

                                                   “Friday”, Steve asked, “Please let me know when the children are asleep.”

                                                   “Of course, Captain.”

                                                   As the men returned to the common room, Tony took his phone out of his pocket, “On silent”, he explained as he looked at his screen, “I have to take this. I’ll be right there.”

                                                  The other 3 made it back to the common room and Tony rejoined the group in a few minutes. A.J. and Cooper were competing in a game on their tablets. The adults were discussing what had to be done to prepare dinner, when Friday interrupted the conversation, “Excuse me, Star Spangled Man with a Plan, the children and Fergus are asleep.”

                                               Everyone in the Common Room burst into laughter. Y/N winced, knowing this teasing would go on for a while. Steve hung his head, “Thank you, Friday.” He lifted his head and scanned the room, “I hate all of you.”

                                                With the littles asleep, Y/N took the opportunity to stand and face Steve. She kept her voice calm as she asked "Can we talk?" 

      Feeling a pit open in his stomach, Steve nodded and forced his face to be calm. "Yeah. Of course." He led her to the kitchen. 

      Body tense, Bucky stood and followed the pair. 

     "Barnes!" Tony snapped, annoyed the supersoldier needed to snoop. He had tried so hard to fix this and mend bridges. He did not want everything to go back to square one.

      Natasha spoke as Bucky turned. "Don't do anything."

       Rolling his eyes, Bucky whisper yelled. "I'm just making sure!" He turned back and continued to walk over. He needed to make sure today wouldn't be ruined. 

       Steve began to speak, wanting to let Y/N know how sorry he was. He was sure she would be upset. He would be ready. "I'm so sorry." He began once the kitchen door was closed. 

       Holding her hands up to stop him, Y/N shook her head. "No need for apologies. It's OK."

      Steve froze, unsure of how to react. 

      "It's Christmas." Y/N shrugged. "Of course she's going to get an insane amount of gifts." 

      Steve nodded, waiting for her to finish her thought. 

       "I have an idea I want to run by you." Y/N continued. "I'm hoping this will cut down any fights, confusion or tantrums that may occur. I'm thinking, by the end of the weekend, Matilda has to go through all of the toys she has and decide where they will live- my house, your house or the family house."

        Recognition beginning to show, Steve nodded. "Once the toy is put in whatever home she chooses it does not leave." He added. 

         Y/N nodded. "My thoughts exactly." 

       Resting his hand on the counter, Steve smiled. "I think it's brilliant." He said. 

       "Perfect!" Y/N returned his smile. 

        Letting out a breath, Bucky returned to the common room and took his seat. He nodded at the family. "All is well."

 The littles were tasked with setting the table. Matilda went to her partner in crime to ask for help. And, as per usual, Bucky melted when she asked. He lifted her up and put her on his shoulders before putting her Captain America Bear on the couch. Once Matilda was lifted, the other littles ran to ask for 'help'. Nate was secure on Tasha's shoulders, Cass sat on Bruce's shoulders and Lila sat on her dad's shoulders. 

           Sarah shook her head as she gave a low laugh. "Wrapped around their fingers." She said as she nudged Y/N's shoulder. 

        Nodding in agreement, Y/N spoke. "I don't think they mind." She laughed as Sarah agreed. 

        Once the table was done, Sam asked Bucky to cut some vegetables for the salad. He knew what would happen and he wanted to laugh. 

       Quickly setting up his station and washing the vegetables, Bucky did a little flip of his knife between his fingers, blushing at the praise from his Hobbit, and began to work. 

       "Uncle Bucky…" Matilda began. "Lot happen today."

          "It did." Bucky agreed. 

         "But good day." She affirmed. She continued when she felt him nod. Leaning down she whispered "think daddy and mama like gift?"

         "I think your dad and mom loved their gift. They had happy tears." Bucky said as he continued to chop. "You picked the best pictures and made sure the cups were their favorite color." He moved onto his last bunch of lettuce. "It was the perfect gift for both of them."

         Matilda accepted that answer. "Uncle Bucky?"

     "Yes my Hobbit?"

       "Can has day to hang out?"

       Bucky stopped mid chop, his brow wrinkled. "We always spend time together Hobbit."

        Letting out a breath, Matilda leaned down and whispered again. "Want day one on one." She said. "You and me. Then me and Uncle Sam. Then me and Aunt Tasha…"

        "And Uncle Bruce and Uncle Tony." Bucky said as he finished. 

       "And Uncle Happy, Uncle Clint. Aunt Sarah, Aunt Laura, Funcle Chris and Peeta!" Matilda explained. "Love all and want days with all."

         "I think we can arrange that." Bucky said as he picked his knife back up. 

        "Uncle Bucky? What we do?"

       Thinking for a beat, Bucky asked. "Have you ever been to the top of the Empire State Building?" 

        "No."

        "Then that's what we will do."

        Matilda giggled as her uncle began to talk about their day together and what they would do. She listened with excitement until she looked down. "Uncle Sam?" She gently called, stopping Uncle Bucky’s conversation. "This good?" She pointed at the cucumbers Uncle Bucky was chopping.  

        Seeing the sly smile on Sam's face, Natasha approached Sarah and Laura. Motioning to the trio, she said "watch what happens next."

          "I think that is too big.' Sam declared. "Needs to be a bit smaller."

          Rolling his eyes, Bucky adjusted nothing as Sam walked away and he began chopping again. 

         Tapping his head, Matilda spoke. "Uncle Bucky it too big!"

         "It's OK, Hobbit."

         Shaking her head, Matilda insisted. "Little smaller. Uncle Sam say."

         Releasing an annoyed breath, Bucky adjusted and began to cut smaller. 

        Sam walked over with the same smirk. He wiped it from his lips as he looked at Matilda. "That's too small."

         Tapping her uncle's head. Matilda gently said. "Now too small."

        Sarah and Laura stifled a laugh. 

        Adjusting once more, Bucky found a rhythm and began to chop. He went back to speaking about his day with his Hobbit. He found he was so excited and had so many things he wanted to do. He hoped there would be enough time. 

         He would have to get up early. He was more than OK with that. 

           Everyone was at the table admiring the food. Honey ham and roast turkey sat in the center of the table. They were surrounded by sides- twice baked sweet potatoes, green beans, gravy, dill carrots, chorizo and poblano pepper stuffing, stuffed mushrooms, roasted asparagus and cauliflower, salad, homemade dinner rolls, homemade Mac and Cheese and two big bowls of mashed potatoes made their mouths water. 

       "Everyone dig in." Tony announced. A few agents had come up to take a share for themselves and the others waiting downstairs. Matilda and Uncle Tony made sure they had more than enough before the food was brought to the table. 

         Plates were piled high with food. Everyone wanted to try everything. Parents were helping the littles put food on their plates, making sure they did not pile them high. Matilda eagerly asked for a bit of everything, giggling as more was added to her plate. Her mama was scooping Mac and Cheese onto her plate when she looked at her dad's. 

        Steve saw and chuckled. It was only a matter of time and he knew that. Gently pushing his plate over, he offered before she could ask. "Go ahead little one."

         Taking her fork, Matilda whispered "Thank you daddy." She took a piece of sweet potato and popped it in her mouth. She gave a smile as she excitingly nodded. "It good!" She declared. She then took a small piece of turkey and declared the same before she say back down. Leaning into her mama, Matilda said "Orange 'tatoes best!"

          Y/N laughed. "Thank you for the recommendation." She leaned down and kissed their daughter's hair. "Let's eat."

        The table became quiet for a bit. The only bit of discussion was how good the food was. They ate in blissful silence, enjoying the taste and the feeling of being around family. 

       Matilda crawled to her mama when she was done eating. She reached for her dad, holding tight to his hand. "Full…" she said.   

       "You ate a lot my love." Y/N said as she rubbed her back. 

        "All good." She gave a bashful smile. 

        "Yes it was." Steve agreed. 

          Surprisingly the littles had a small amount of dessert. They had eaten so much food that they did not have a lot of room in their stomachs. 

        Tony declared dessert for breakfast!

        After sitting in the common room to digest for an hour, Y/N had decided it was time for her to go home. She was tired and. While she had left enough food for the cats, she found she missed her other babies. She wanted to check on Neil and Terry. 

       She got up and said goodbye to everyone. She knew she shouldn't have been but she was surprised with the hugs and warm goodbyes she got. She said goodbye to the Bartons. They were heading home tomorrow. But the Wilsons would be here the whole week. She would see Sarah and the boys during the week. 

       Looking at the pile of toys, Y/N and Steve had another brief discussion- Matilda would take all the presents from Grammy And Gramps to Y/N's house. She had the rest if the week to decide where everything else would live. 

       Matilda came out bundled up and ready to go. She rested a hand on Fergie until her mama was ready. 

       Giving one final goodbye, Y/N picked Matilda up as she ran to her and carried her to the elevator followed by Steve and Happy carrying the bags.

       Giving her mama a good squeeze "love you mama." She kissed her mama's cheek. 

        "I love you Ducky."

                   Steve helped Y/N carry her presents and the suitcase up to her apartment. Matilda ran in front of them to her mom’s house, Cap bear held tightly, chased by Fergus.

                                          Happy had driven them and offered to wait in the car to keep it warm, but Steve said he and Matilda would walk back to the Tower. 

                                           As soon as the apartment door opened, Terry ran to greet everyone and Banshee began to howl. Fergus went to check on her.

                                         “I was wondering who was watching her with Ryan away”, Steve smiled.

                                          “Yes, but it’s been an adjustment. She’s a lot more vocal than Neil and Terry,” Y/N giggled, “I guess she’s just hungry. Let me feed them”

                                            “I help”, Matilda ran to the kitchen, followed by her mom. Steve placed the gifts by the Christmas tree and the suitcase at the entrance to the hallway.

                                             “Steve”, Y/N called, “Would you come here, please?”

                                             He walked to the kitchen to find Banshee sound asleep on Fergus. “Look, Daddy”, Matilda pointed, “Fergie help Banshee.”

                                           Steve shook his head, “He really is amazing.”

                                           “Fergie is bestest boy!” Matilda praised. 

                                            Y/N took out her phone and snapped a few pictures, “I need proof. Ryan would never believe me.”

                                           She gave the food bowls to Matilda, one at a time to feed the cats. As soon as Banshee smelled food, she woke up for her dinner, loudly thanking Matilda. Y/N offered a treat to Fergie, who accepted it as a gentleman. Y/N took her suitcase to her bedroom. She knew it was getting to be the time where Matilda would leave with her father. This would be the first Christmas night without her daughter. She took a moment to center herself.

                                           Steve, Matilda and Fergus were waiting in the living room while the cats had their dinner. She climbed into his lap, “What thinking, Daddy?”

                                            “Little one, if you want to stay with Mommy tonight, that’s OK. I can come pick you up in the morning.”

                                            “No. Want  go with you, Daddy”, she answered immediately.

                                            “OK. But you can change your mind, if you like.”

                                            She wriggled off his lap and went to the kitchen, returning with the schedule. Holding it up to him, she asked, “What today?”

                                            “It’s Christmas, little one.”

                                            “Silly Daddy”, she giggled, “What day on paper?”

                                             Steve pointed to the 25th on the schedule, which was colored pink and blue. Then Matilda pointed to the next day, which was colored blue.

                                             “Blue Daddy color. Now time be with you. Mr. Jerry say so”, she explained.

                                              Steve nodded, “You’re right.”

                                              Matilda ran the schedule back to the kitchen and hung it on the fridge. As she came back into the living room, her mom came in too. She ran to her mom who caught her and hugged her, “Love you, Mama”.

                                              “I love you, Ducky. Did you have a good Christmas?”

                                              “Best Christmas. Has both. Has you!”, she tapped her mom, then pointed to Steve, “And has Daddy.”

                                               Steve blushed, feeling such a surge of joy, he was concerned he would cry. Fergus came to sit by him and nudged his chin.

                                             Matilda laughed and tapped her forehead, “I forget, Has Fergie, Neil, Terry and Banshee. Best Christmas!”

                                             Y/N and Steve laughed, caught up in their little girl’s joy.

                                            Yes, you do”, her mom assured and hugged her. “Are you ready to go with Daddy?”

                                            “Yesh, Mama!”

                                             “You know, before you go, we have 1 more present to give.”

                                              Matilda covered her mouth, “Glad you ’membered.” Y/N put her on her feet and she searched the bags by the tree until she found the 1 wrapped gift.

 She walked to Steve and handed it to him, “For you, Daddy.”

                                               Steve was confused, “You already gave me your present, little one.”

                                               “This from Grammy”, she explained.

                                               Steve opened the gift to find a dark blue (almost black) knitted hat trimmed in orange and a matching scarf.  As Steve took it out, he found a note and read it.  

                                          Merry Christmas, Steve.

                                                        I wanted to give you something special to welcome you back to our family on this first Christmas together. I hope these will keep you warm and will remind you that although it’s been a long road and there are still a few cracks, we will stick together and work to make a whole family for our little love.

                                                                          Love, Mirabella

                                       Steve could feel tears beginning to line his lashes, but he wouldn’t cry - not now. He said a quick prayer of thanks for this gracious and loving woman.

                                        “They’re beautiful”, he whispered.

                                        She knitted them herself”, Y/N pointed out.

                                         Matilda took the hat and offered it to her dad, “Daddy, put on. See if fit.”

                                        He put the hat on and Matilda declared that it fit and he looked nice.

                                        He opened his coat and removed the scarf he was wearing and put on Mirabella’s. “May I take your picture, so I can send it to Mom?” Y/N asked.

                                       “Of course.” Matilda asked to be picked up and instructed him to stand in front of the tree. He held her and Y/N took a picture, sending it right away to Mirabella and a copy to Steve’s phone.

                                        Matilda tapped his shoulder, “Ready, daddy.”        

                                        He put her on her feet and she ran to say goodbye to her mom. Y/N hugged her and kissed her, “I love you, Ducky. I’ll see you in a few days.”

                                       “Can come visit, Mama?”

                                       “You can come any time, Ducky.” She put her on her feet and she took her dad’s hand, “Come, Fergie.”

                                        Fergus trotted to his 2 favorite hoomans and Y/N walked them to the door. She leaned down and kissed her daughter again, “I love you, Ducky.”

                                       “Love you too, Mama!”

                                       Steve knew on the school days she was with him, he would bring her by in the morning to see her mom. He would make sure she would see her mom, even if it was just for a few minutes, every day of the Winter break she was with him.

                                       When they came back downstairs, Matilda was surprised that Happy wasn’t waiting for them. “I asked him not to wait. I wanted to be a little selfish tonight. I just wanted a little time - just me and you. Is that OK?”

                                      She held her hands up to him and he immediately picked her up. She clutched her Cap bear close to her body. 

                                      “You miss me, Daddy?”

                                        “Not really missed you, but there are so many people and I wanted to have a little quiet time with you.”

                                         “I say to Uncle Bucky. Want day just me and him.”

                                         “That sounds like a great idea, my girl.” he smiled.

                                         “You no be sad or alone?” she asked, concerned.

                                         “No, I’ll be fine”, he assured her.

                                          “But want lone time with all. But want lone time with my Daddy.”

                                          “It’s OK, my girl. I think it would be fun for you to have alone time with your aunts and uncles.”

                                           She nodded. “But come have time with you after”, she promised.

                                          “That would be perfect”, he smiled.

                                          They walked quietly, she snuggled close to her dad, inhaling the scent of jelly beans and loving the feeling of security she had when he held her. She drew a triangle on his cheek, “Love you, Daddy.”

                                         She held her palm up to him and he drew 2 perfect triangles, reciting “I.Love.You.My.Best.Girl.” at each point, then sealing them with a kiss.

                                         “Daddy, has good Christmas?”

                                         “My girl”, he kissed the top of her head, “This is my best Christmas because you’re here with me.”

                                          “Daddy!”, she hid her face in his neck.

                                           “It’s true, my girl”, he assured, “You always make my days the best.”

                                            She didn’t answer him and after a few minutes, he thought she had fallen asleep.

                                           “Daddy”, she said, “Happy Grammy and Gramps give Cap ‘Merica to me.”

                                            “Really? Why?”

                                            “He best hero”, she explained, “He save other stuffies.”

                                             “Will he?”

                                             “Yes, Daddy”. She spent the rest of their walk back to the tower explaining how Captain America would keep Teddy, Nora, Roger, Gregory and the rest of her stuffies safe - and he loved every word of her story.

Tag List:

➪ @loveaffaire

dark little paradise 18+

James Buchanan Barnes walked like a god and people couldn’t believe you made him weak. Oh, you really did make him weak. Mob Boss Bucky x Reader

lavender, yellow and you

Bucky’s journey from sleeping on the cold, hard floor to sleeping on the warm, lavender scented bed, all because of you. Boyfriend!Bucky Barnes x Reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @onceuponabarnes

sweet as sugar 18+

reader gets stood up for dinner by her father and dadsbestfriend!bucky is there to make sure she’s okay

-------------------------------------

➪ @buckycuddlebuddy

i was made for lovin' you 18+

“having miles on the stage with me today felt amazing, but i miss him as a baby.” he kissed the spot right under your ear. “i want another.” rockstar!bucky barnes x bassist!reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @ambrosiase

forever a day

in which you and bucky create the life he’d always dreamt of having, the one he never thought he’d get. Dad bucky x mum reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @cupidsbarnes

enormity of desire 18+

a clean break would be easier, but it’s not what you want. dadsbestfriend!bucky

-------------------------------------

➪ @jurassicbarnes

saltwater kisses 18+

In which he whisks you away on a romantic getaway at his beach house. Dilf bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪@kinanabinks

sunday chores around town

the town that bucky and you live in cant get over how hot you both are, especially your kids friends and the other mums at school. Dilf Bucky x Milf Reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @coffeecatsandcandles

welcome 18+

You are properly welcomed to the block by your new neighbor. dilf!Bucky Barnes x reader

parent teacher conference - masterlist 18+

James Barnes, a widowed single dad, had forgotten what love felt like and let it crush him, taking his daughter, Rebecca, with him. He was cold, rude, and arrogant, being one of the few teachers at Westview High School the students seemed to absolutely despise. But when you show up, a hopeful math teacher who’d previously taught Rebecca’s kindergarten class, and are adored by your students and colleagues- James’s attitude starts to change. Teacher/dad bucky x teacher reader

moving on

You and Bucky reflect on your failed marriage. ex husband!Bucky Barnes x f!reader

drunk

You and Bucky’s teenage daughter comes home drunk, and Bucky takes care of her. dad!Bucky x mom!Reader

puppy dog eyes

Rebecca Barnes had gone from the terrible twos to the terrible teens. You finally put your foot down, scolding her for taking advantage of Bucky’s inability to say no. But when she calls him in distress one night, all Bucky knows to do is to save his baby girl. Dad!bucky x mom!reader (ft. Rebecca Barnes)

-------------------------------------

➪ @nacho-bucky

seven thirty - masterlist

You were planning on a productive — if lonely — weekend, but the little girl across the hall has different ideas about how you and Bucky Barnes should be spending your time. Neighbour Bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @mallowswriting

salt the earth

brock rumlow is a slick, charming, wise-cracking businessman that you are lucky to have a claim to. brock rumlow is your fiance. brock rumlow is going to suffocate you.

brock rumlow is going to be surprised when you disappear, nothing left behind but a note.

but once you’ve gone through with steps 1-4 of your 5 step escape plan, you find out that the ‘friend’ nat told you to meet - the ‘friend’ who is going to drive you across the country to the utopia of safety that is new york - just had to be bucky fucking barnes. AU bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @wkemeup

by any other name : series masterlist

Special Agent Bucky Barnes has been known by many names. He’s used to taking on new identities and dismantling criminal enterprises from the inside. When he’s tasked with infiltrating Hydra and gathering evidence against its leader, Brock Rumlow, Bucky finds himself drawn to the woman who doesn’t seem to belong in this world of violence, the wife to the head of Hydra... you. Agent bucky x reader

vengeful spirits

A year after the fire and the end of Hydra, Brock Rumlow's ghost is still haunting you. Agent bucky x reader

double blind

Set up on what might be the worst blind date you’d ever been on, you find yourself captivated by the mysterious bartender instead Bartender bucky x reader

i'm with you masterlist

When two strangers meet on a layover in the Charlotte Airport, they are sent on a whirlwind weekend filled with cancelled flights, painful questions over giant checkers, an ex-boyfriend’s wedding, and a confrontational graduation. They find that a lifetime can sit in the span of three days and it doesn’t take very long at all to fall in love. Bucky barnes x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @buckyhoney

the bar rules

the hot bartender always makes a shitty breakup feel better, and not just be serving you drinks. Bartender bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @luciilferss

charming 18+

in which you’re a girl in need of protection, and Bucky’s the perfect man for the job. bodyguard bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @em-imagines

you give love a bad name

he's constantly chasing you like a puppy to give him a chance, what happens when you finally do? highschool bucky x you

-------------------------------------

➪ @givinhell

you can be the boss 18+

bucky barnes is exactly your type - smug, incredibly attractive and a bit too old for you - all dangerous and manly, strong and kinda cold, even. oh, he just so happens to be your dad’s best friend (and your best friend’s dad), too. dads best friend bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @bucksfucks

fake boyfriends, real orgasms : masterlist 18+

when bucky needs a date to sam’s wedding, he makes a deal with you. when it starts to turn into something a little more real, you realize how deep you’re in. Roommate bucky x reader

mr brightside 18+

the one where you fuck your ex’s dad ex’s dad bucky x reader

happy accident 18+

an accidental nude turns out to be the best mistake of your life. dads best friend!bucky x f!reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @becca-e-barnes

take care of everything 18+

There’s only one thing in your life that your PA doesn’t take care of Personal Assistant! Bucky Barnes x Lawyer! Reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @pellucid-constellations

flashing lights

Bucky’s worst fears come true when he’s called to a scene. If he’s the one with the dangerous job, then why is it your life that’s hanging in the balance? Paramedic!Bucky x reader

for the love of the game masterlist

Bucky Barnes was a menace. NYU’s top baseball player, he was used to girls falling at his feet and could smooth talk his way out of just about anything. You hated him. He couldn’t figure out why. So when the novelty of weekend parties and quick hookups finally wore off—and his feelings for you began to grow—he made it his mission to fix it. College!Bucky x Reader

undisclosed - masterlist

Desperate to outrun a secret that could cost you your life, you seek refuge in a small mountain town. Its deep forests and small cabins make it the perfect place to hide, but the travel website hadn’t mentioned anything about the quiet, burly lumberjack that wouldn’t leave your thoughts. No one had warned Bucky about you either. Lumberjack Bucky x Reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @buckyjamess

to build a home masterlist

a mechanic and a nurse walk into a schoolyard..both new in the single parent life, chaos arises when the two come together but they wouldn't have it any other way. mechanic single dad bucky x nurse reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @baezen

starring role masterlist

in which hollywood’s former hottest movie star faces his biggest challenge yet – proving that he’s still worth the starring role actor bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @invisibleanonymousmonsters

black serpent

James Buchanan Barnes was the most notorious mobster of New York City. He was rich. He was powerful. He was feared. But something – or rather someone – made him realize his life meant so little to him. Mobster Bucky x Fem Reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @starduststevie

those we should not touch 18+

you want your dad's best friend. you know it's wrong but you can't resist. Dads best friend bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @blanketbarnes

mother dearest

Meeting Bucky's mom, Winnifred for the first time. mob!bucky barnes x f!reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @fvckingavengers

cigarettes after sex 18+

What’s a bad habit shared between friends? bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @specialk-18

run to you masterlist 18+

Being a protector…Bucky knew that feeling all too well – serving in the military would do that to a man. But Bucky swore to himself he was out of that life. All until a job fell into his lap that he just couldn’t resist. Bodyguard! Bucky Barnes x Actress! Reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @agentofbarnes

side bar 18+

I hate your voice, but god I love hearing you beg. bartender!bucky x ceo!reader

tricks and treats

becca and grant first time going for trick or treat husband!bucky barnes x wife!empath!reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @classylo

for the best 18+

you were the IT couple. beautiful marriage, beautiful twins, you truly had it all. until one day you didn’t. but are breaks always for the best? dilf!bucky barnes x female reader

brothers best friend 18+

you’re at your brothers wedding without a date thanks to your boyfriend ditching you at the last minute...but thank god your brothers  annoyingly hot and perfect and handsome best friend is there to keep you company brothers best friend bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @starbuckie

three flags up 18+

the three stages of bucky’s realization of love for his best friend and the one time he gets the girl. camp counselor!bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @bitsandbobsandstuff

safe with me | masterlist 18+

When an unknown threat enters your life, protection is offered at the highest level. As Bucky Barnes comes into your life, the game changes, and you realise falling for the man tasked with keeping you safe is the last thing you expected. body guard bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @wienerbarnes

heart-eyed surprise

bucky and kids with make anyone melt. even under all the leather. Teacher!Bucky x Bartender!Reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @bucky-bucket-barnes | masterlist

boys don't cry

Bucky keeps all his emotions buried deep within because that’s what he believes he’s supposed to do. One night after he’s attacked, he goes to you searching for some sense of comfort. After a loving conversation, Bucky learns to let it all out. hurt!bucky x comfort!reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @seventven

au pair

wealthy businessman james buchanan barnes and his wife hire an au pair to help them with their 5 year old son. soon, it’s not just his kid benefitting from the work of the new nanny. wealthy dilf!bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @twilightrogers

in the late hours, i'm yours to have 18+

bucky loves waking you up by making you feel good roommate !boxer!bucky barnes x female!reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @majestyeverlasting

hang in there, super soldier

The main festivities of Halloween night have dwindled, yet the fun lives on. As the children count and enjoy their candy, you and Bucky watch from your place cuddled up on the couch. Before heading off to bed, Jamie insists on showing everyone how fast he can put his toy handcuffs on his father. But where the key is ends up being the question. However, all is well in the end. And you find yourself more than grateful for your little family and an abundance of memories. Dad!Bucky x Mom!Reader

-------------------------------------

➪@nev3rfound

hope for the next generation

bucky arrives home to see cobwebs, pumpkins and ghastly decorations lining the streets for halloween- a holiday he's still getting used to. but when it comes to the children in costumes, bucky can't help but have a soft spot for some of their costume choices Dad!bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪@nexusnyx

coming in hot - masterlist 18+

When your best friend Sarah recommends you a mechanic of her brother’s trust, all you can think about and pray to is that he doesn’t rip you off. Your car is your prized possession and amidst all the worry and concern of your medical studies, drowning in even more debt sounds as suffocating as it would be. Mechanic bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @spiritualchange

diamonds are a girl's best friend

bucky just wants to treat his girl after being away for so long mob!sugar daddy!bucky barnes x fem!reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @mellowswriting

devotion 18+

Bucky never thought he would achieve that life he dreamed of all those decades ago - the idyllic house full of kids and a wife he adores to kiss him when he comes home from work. But of course, you just had to go and prove him wrong. Dilf! bucky x reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @mobbucky

happy ever after 18+

Being married to him was one of the best things that could have ever happened to you, but seeing him as an incredible dad was far more than you had ever imagined, it certainly caused a never ending thirst for him. dad! Bucky Barnes x f! mom reader

-------------------------------------

➪ @frostironfudge

venus 18+

Bucky Barnes is your very capable bodyguard. Bodyguard!Bucky Barnes x reader

-------------------------------------

Bucky had already delayed in asking Y/N to marry him for so long, he saw no reason to continue now, now that he was sure enough time had passed for her to make a decision she could be sure of.

But new fears had a way of finding him, of sinking their claws into the meat of every worry he’s ever had.

He’s still standing in the open doorway to the apartment, warm breeze at his back, coming summer drifting on the wind.

Bucky’s mother turns away, bustling toward the stove. “It’s about time,” she returns in Romanian, knocking the wooden spoon she picks up against the side of the pot on the stove, preparing to reheat a soup she’d made the day before. “And just when I was getting used to hearing rumors about my uncouth son and his girl.” Winnifred scoffs, “Living together before marriage, what could possibly be worse?”

She chuckles under her breath, amused at the outraged whispers of some of their neighbors.

Bucky swallows, nerves cracking up his spine.

“Ma,” he says quietly, sweeping the cap off his head as he sits down at the kitchen table, screen door clattering shut behind him. “Please.”

“Are you asking for my approval? I’ve been waiting for this since the moment I saw her. She looked at you in that worn coat and with that terribly outgrown haircut and decided that she still loved you-,”

“Ma,” Bucky complains gently before glancing up at her, fist against her hip, wooden spoon waving in the air before her, a warning for him to choose his next words carefully. “I - should I? We seem to get on as we are. She’s as much a part of the family as any of us. Maybe asking her now will…upset the life we have.”

Maybe it would remind her of everything he wasn’t, too.

His mother softens, drops her arm and rounds the table. “Are you worried she will say no?” She touches his shoulder carefully. Still so cautious with him, despite the years between him and the war, despite the changes in him.

But Bucky doesn’t want to admit that that is exactly what he’s afraid of. He glances away, fiddling with the edge of yesterday’s newspaper still spread open on the table.

His mother’s voice is tender when she answers, moving to smooth a hand through his hair. “If there’s one thing I know, its that she will not say no to you. She would not say no to you if you proposed moving to the moon. She wouldn’t say no if you proposed to her with a rubber band.”

Bucky licks his lips and looks up at his mother, “Think so?”

“Yes. I know.” She pats his cheek, smiling.

He nods but doesn’t answer, thinking about how he left Y/N that morning. Golden sunshine on her naked skin, sleepy smile, fingers pressed gently to his bicep, telling him he would be late if he didn’t leave soon.

But god, how he hadn’t wanted to go. He’d wanted to sink back down beside her, worship the sun on her skin. He never had to think with her, he could just simply be. She did not judge him, she understood the things that lived inside his skin and accepted them.

How could he ever think to ask her to marry him? How could he ever think he was worth that? How could he ask her to make yet another sacrifice for him?

He remembers asking her if she would wait, in so many words, as was his way. But, of course, Y/N had known, had known exactly what he meant.

“You gettin’ impatient with me?”

“Never,” she murmurs. “I’ll wait. For you, I will.”

Bucky had not wanted to ask her back then, worried that the memories of him before would influence her decision, worried that she would be agreeing to marry the charming, boyish man she met before he was captured and tortured and injected with something horrible, before he became a Howling Commado and almost died on a train.

Before he lost that part of himself.

His ma has returned to the stove, letting him think.

Bucky still worries, even though in practice they’d practically been a married couple for years, that he’s too much for her, that she deserved better.

He worries that he’s too broken, too poor, too little of everything to be what a good husband should be, to be worth the glittering soul of the woman he loves.

“Will she come for lunch? I was surprised she didn’t come with us this morning. I found another Romanian book I think would help her learn that I wanted to give her.”

Winnifred and Y/N had begun trading books, teaching each other their own language. Y/N more often than not went to church with his mother.

“She had a shift at the hospital,” he murmurs, tracing a whorl in the worn wood of the table, reminding him of that niggling thought always at the back of his mind. He’d never properly be able to provide for her. “That’s just it, ma. I can never give her the life she should have.” Y/N worked long hours, they both did. They scrimped and saved for every little thing. He was still broken on the inside sometimes, the fractured fissures that ran straight through the center of him still showing themselves at the oddest times.

Bucky still dreams of needles in his arm, dank labs, and a table with straps. He dreams of train cars and guns and blood. He dreams of a nurse with dark, serious eyes frowning at him as she dies in a muddy field.

The war had ended years ago, his stint as a prisoner of war several years before that.

And yet, his mind would not let him forget. Made him jump with the roll of thunder, sweat through nightmares of times long past.

How was he supposed to saddle Y/N with that permanently? At least now, if she realized, she could go without fanfare.

Not that he would deny her a divorce, but it would make it so much easier for her to leave if she didn’t have to deal with him at all.

She could escape him so much more easily if they weren’t married.

Would he be trapping her? In a life with a poor husband, with nightmares, with wounds that would never heal?

“What makes you think that Y/N wants an easy life?”

He glances up, his mother ladling warmed soup into two bowls. “What?”

Winnifred turns, sets a bowl of ciorba de burta in front of him, and holds out a spoon as she takes a seat across from him with her own bowl. “James Barnes,” she says, “This is the woman who volunteered to be a nurse in a war, who carried papers to the resistance when she was there, who came home and kept working. Who doesn’t take counsel from anyone except herself. Who was so loyal, she waited and looked for you for months, when by all logic she should have assumed you were dead. Who has now waited years for you to be…well enough to ask her and has demanded nothing of you in return. No promises.”

Bucky looks down and away at that, chastised.

He knows its true, knows how dangerous it can be for a woman, that she’d been taking a great chance with him all these years.

The memory of the outline of her shape behind the frosted glass of the bodega flits back to him, the relief he’d felt when she dove into his arms when he found her again after the war. How well she’s loved him since the moment they met in that field tent during the war.

“She loves you, Bucky. Can’t you see that, darling? She puts up with me and Becca. She’s learning Romanian for no good reason other than to talk to me. She’s learning how to cook our favorite dishes. She comes to church with me more often than not, and even though she doesn’t say it I know she’s not religious. She’s not doing these things for fun, she’s doing them because she loves you. If she was going to change her mind, she would have done it years ago. She wouldn’t have made the decision to choose you at all. I’m so glad she chose you when you were…shot,” her voice trembles and wavers around the word.

Bucky hadn’t known Y/N had told his mother that story, didn’t know they had found enough understood English and Romanian between them to convey that much.

“Don’t make her wait anymore,” Winnifred continues. “Don’t make that brave girl keep soldiering on with the way people talk about her, about the pair of you. You deserve her and she certainly deserves you. She already chose you a long time ago, it’s you she’s been waiting on.”

Bucky swallows against the lump in his throat, against the warmth of the sun at his back. He’s still amazed sometimes, that he got to come home. And he’s suddenly overwhelmed, that he’s sitting in his mother’s kitchen, eating homemade food, talking about marrying a girl that should by all accounts be fed up with him by now.

“Could I have your ring?” He asks, voice thick.

His ma pats his hand, “Of course. Of course you can, my son. If you think it's the right ring for her.”

~

Y/N’s not wearing a shirt when Bucky opens their bedroom door that evening.

He’d toed off his shoes by the front door and crept down the hall on silent feet, catching her at her most natural.

She’s already changed into a pair of his trousers, unbuttoned and cradling the curve of her hips in a way that makes him want to fall to his knees. She’s still wearing her bra, blouse discarded on the armchair in the corner.

As always, somehow, she still looks elegant, even half dressed in men’s clothes, she’s graceful with beauty.

Night has already settled over the city. The curtains and blinds are drawn, only the lamp by his bedside illuminating the room, casting a golden hue against her skin.

She turns from her place standing in front of their dresser where a mirror is propped up, plucking off her earrings, tiny golden hoops that shimmer in her hand. “Hey, sugar,” she smiles at him. “Thought you’d be home well before me.”

“Got ta talkin’ with ma,” he answers, hand on the doorknob, eyes drifting over her shape, at the delicate chain of the necklace he’d gotten her after a year together resting at the hollow of her throat. “Ya know how she can talk.”

“Oh sure,” dark eyes flick over him, lingering on his mouth for a moment before she turns back to the mirror, hip jutting out, all her weight resting on one foot. He feels a fond smile tug at his lips, knows she expected him to cross the room and kiss her, and is annoyed he didn’t. “You Barneses are a chatty bunch. Becca nearly talked my ear off on the phone yesterday.”

Her eyes are coy when she meets his gaze in the mirror briefly, arm twisting behind her back to unhook the clasp of her bra.

Bucky steps forward then, catches her fingers in his, brushing his hand against the line of her shoulders. “Lemme get that for you, honey,” he says, deftly unfastening the catch.

She leans back into him, silently happy, and tilts her head to the side to look back at him, “Missed ya today, kid.” Her eyes are appreciative as they flick over him, teasing.

As always, he fights the urge to duck his head, to blush against her attention, so open with her affection and appreciation of him. Bucky traces his hands down her arms, goosebumps rising in the wake of his touch, curling his fingers around her wrists briefly.

“Mm,” he murmurs, releasing her hands to tuck his arms around her waist, watching her in the mirror. Y/N slides the bra down her arms and tosses it on the same chair her blouse lies on. “Was wondering if you’d like ta go on a date with me next Saturday? Ya don’t have to work, right?”

She tilts her head to the side and closes her eyes when he presses a kiss behind her ear. Bucky watches her in the mirror, eyes flicking over the long column of her throat, the swell of her chest. “What’s in it for me?”

“I’ll fuck you real good after.”

A rare and unexpected laugh bubbles out of her, eyes flashing open to meet his. “Guess ya didn’t learn anything in church today then,” her voice is low, amused.

“Never. I’m past saving. And I already got someplace to worship.”

“And where’s that?”

Bucky kisses her neck, feels his heartbeat in his bones, and lets his hands drift up to cup her breasts. “Right here honey. I pray to you every night.”

“I do think that falls under blasphemy, Barnes,” she says, serious eyes appraising him, but arches into his touch all the same, covering his hands with hers.

“How was work?” He asks against the curve of her ear, inhaling the scent of rose dabbed on the nape of her neck.

She doesn’t immediately answer, and when Bucky glances up at the mirror he finds that her eyes have fallen closed and that she’s basking in the presence of him like a plant in light. Something inside him softens, and he moves his arms to curl around her hips again, holding her close. “Good,” she says, not opening her eyes. “I went to dinner with Peggy after. Did you get to eat?”

Y/N presses her fingers back into his ribs without turning, like she would be able to feel his lie, like she would be able to feel the food he did not eat.

“Had lunch,” he soothes. “Ma sent some leftovers with me for ya. She sent a book for you too. Romanian folk tales, I think.”

She hums with pleasure at the thought of a new book to devour before refocusing on him, “Lemme cook some dinner for you, honey. Then we can have a drink and smoke.”

“Vodka?”

“What else, kid?” She asks, finally opening her eyes to glance into his.

She pauses when she catches his gaze in the mirror, the serious pull of her brows returning, a frown tilting her mouth. “Somethin’ on your mind, Buck?” He shakes his head but she only narrows her eyes at him. “Mhm,” She turns in his arms, the warm length of her pressed against him. She pinches his chin between her forefinger and thumb, angling his head so she can meet his eyes head on. “Somethin’s going on. What is it?”

“Dunno what you’re talkin’ about, dahlin’.”

Y/N trails her hand down his chest, along the buttons of his shirt before stopping at his belt. “What are you hiding from me, James Barnes?” She sounds just a bit hurt.

They did not hide things from each other, not like this.

His heart gives a painful thump, even though he knows she has no reason to worry.

Bucky catches at her other hand, holding it to his chest. “Leave it alone, honey. You’ll know soon enough. Everything is okay.”

She pulls back, hooking her fingers into the belt loops of trousers. A worried crease pulls at her brow, her lips that serious frown that he loves so well. “Promise me this ain’t something bad, kid,” she says sternly.

Y/N moves her hand to cup his cheek, tilt his head down, demanding of him.

And he wants to melt into her, break down right in that moment and just do it. Just ask her the damn question.

But he doesn’t have the ring.

She presses her palm to the base of neck, forces him to keep his eyes on her.

Bucky loves her so bad in that moment, he wants to sink to his knees, absolved of every crime he’s ever committed, healed of every wrong ever done to him. The possessiveness that radiates from her, reminds him of who exactly he belongs to, makes him feel small in the best way, makes him feel safe.

But he must stay quiet for far too long, lost in the dark depths of those serious eyes, because her voice cracks when she says, “Bucky? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” he says, must comfort her, must make her feel the same safety that he always feels. “Nothin’, sweetheart, I promise. It’s not bad. Lemme do this thing right, okay?”

She blinks, looking confused but soothed. “Okay. I trust you.”

“Thank god for that, dahlin’,” he knocks his forehead against hers, and then kisses her fingers when she traces his mouth. “Promise ya, doll, everything is okay.”

She nods, and he releases her when she tugs away, so she can find a shirt to slip over her head.

Bucky follows the sway of her hips down the hall, to the kitchen where she demands he sit, that she would fry him some eggs and toast.

Cashmere appears, calling out for a dinner that she had yet to receive, pouncing into his lap with a long purr when he sits at the table.

“Complainer,” Y/N accuses, stopping to scratch the cat behind the ears, before she presses the kiss Bucky never gave her to his mouth, touching the line of his jaw.

She’ll say yes, Bucky thinks. She really already has.

~

By the time Saturday rolls around, Bucky is anxious with worry.

He barely sleeps, and can’t relax enough to let Y/N lull the tension out of his bones as she usually does.

Of course, she notices the difference in him, but doesn’t comment on it. Trusting him, as he’d asked, knowing that he would share with her eventually.

Saturday afternoon finds him at the market, purchasing ingredients for dinner, flowers for his lady. An elderly woman helps him pick out the flowers, though he’s well seasoned at the task, having bought her many bouquets over the years.

“‘M askin’ my girl to marry me today,” he tells the woman, wrinkled, lined hands pausing in the tying of the ribbon around the stems of the bunch.

He’s not sure why he tells her, but her mouth pulls into a grin and she says, “Lucky lady.” The woman hands him the bouquet and pats his hands gently. “A handsome man like you? She won’t say no.”

Bucky certainly hopes that will be the case, that everything in Y/N’s life won’t come to a sudden terrible culmination in her mind that makes her turn tail and run.

He checks his pocket obsessively on his way home to make sure the ring is still there, hoping the emerald and gold of the family ring that his mother and Becca had convinced him to use, would be perfect for Y/N.

It's not strictly an engagement ring, but a family ring that had been passed down. His mother insisted he take it.

She’s reading when he makes it back to the apartment, propped up in the open living room window, afternoon sunlight bending around her, pooling on the floor where the cat stretches out, warming the hardwood and haloing her head.

Smoke curls away from her fingertips as she reaches for her cup of coffee, black and bitter, when she notices him.

Her eyes trace over him, before the corner of her mouth twitches. “Hey, kid.” She takes a drag on the cigarette, blows smoke out the window.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he smiles.

She stubs out her smoke and drops the bud before she picks the pencil out of the crease of her book and underlines something, folding the book closed with the pencil to mark her page. “Where are we headin’?”

Bucky winces as she ducks back inside, sliding the window shut behind her, before she brushes nonexistent wrinkles from her floral shirtwaist dress. Her hands are adorned with delicate rings, the ever present gold chain is around her neck. She wears a silk scarf over her hair today, secured at the back of her neck, a few loose pieces of hair framing her face.

He’d told her they would go out for their Saturday date, when a better idea had come to him that morning.

“You look beautiful, doll,” Bucky says, holding out the flowers to her. “But, uh, actually, I thought we could stay in instead. I want to cook for you.”

Her fingers pause, pressing into the cover of her book as she looks at him, butter yellow light tracing along her bare calves. “Sure Buck, we can cook somethin’ together. I think we have-,”

“No,” he interrupts. “I - sorry - I already got it all planned out, sweetheart. I wanna cook for you. Do somethin’ for you.”

Her eyes soften and she crosses the room to him, catlike in her grace, deftly stepping over Cashmere before pressing herself into his arm. “You do things for me all the time, sugar,” she plucks the bouquet from his hand, “Thank you for the flowers.”

Bucky doesn’t answer, heart in his throat, wondering if maybe he should have stuck to his original plan, taken her out to the nice Italian place down the road, dropped to one knee during dinner or the walk after.

But no, that isn’t really their way.

Their way is a quiet one, a personal, secluded one.

She’s still pressed against him, holding the flowers to her nose, lashes glowing in the rays of sunlight. He presses a finger under chin and tips her head up, nipping a quick kiss to her lips over the blooms.

Y/N touches the corner of his mouth with the tips of her fingers before pulling away, swaying to the kitchen to search for the much used vase for the flowers.

“Since I can’t help you cook, what should I do?” She asks, filling the glass with water at the sink, carefully arranging the flowers once it's filled.

“Just sit there and look pretty, doll face. Keep me company.” He sets the bag of groceries on the counter, flicks on the radio, and takes her hand in his, pulling her away from the vase to twirl around the kitchen.

She eyes him carefully, but doesn’t comment on his mood. Instead, she circles her arms around him, surreptitiously slipping her hands down his back to squeeze his ass.

Bucky laughs, kisses the tip of her nose, and pulls away, “None a tha’ yet, honey.”

“Later?”

“I promise. Now sit down and let me charm you.”

“You charm me everyday, kid,” she answers, plopping down at the table and unfastening some of the buttons at the top of her dress now that she knew they’d be staying at home.

He leans over her, one arm along the back of her chair, the other braced against the table. “You can go change if you want, baby,” he knocks his forehead against hers. “If ya wanna be more comfortable.”

“I dressed proper for a date,” she says, falsely prim. “I’ll stay this way thank you.”

She tilts her head up, chin jutting out.

Bucky presses his palm to the back of her neck, kisses her softly. “Well I do like that I get to see so much more of you here.”

She reaches out, tugs his shirt out of his trousers so she can graze her fingers along his stomach, nails digging into his skin.

“Quit that, dahlin’, or we’ll never get to eat.”

She doesn’t stop, fingers dancing to his belt. “But this is our date.”

“Yes, and I have somethin’ planned.”

“Fine,” she sits back. “I’ll behave for now.”

“Thank you,” he murmurs, despite feeling just a little disappointed that she hadn’t shoved him down and done what she liked with him anyways. Bucky kisses the side of her head and moves back to the counter.

Y/N speaks lowly to Cashmere behind him as she strikes a match, cigarette smoke drifting toward the ceiling. “I know,” she says as the cat meows at her. “Barnes is being strange today, I agree. I wonder if he brought us some wine though?”

He chuckles and without turning says, “Got it here. C’mere and I’ll pour ya some.”

She pads over on bare feet, curls into his side. “‘M I allowed to watch ya at least?”

“Sure.”

Her fingers drift across his back, head pillowing on his shoulder as he hands her a glass of wine.

~

Its been hours, and he still hasn’t managed to ask her.

They’ve moved to the fire escape now, the last dying rays of the sunset fading.

He’d meant to ask her once they were eating.

Then he’d told himself he would do it during dessert. Ice cream he had not planned for, but dug out of the freezer anyways.

Then when they had a shot of after dinner vodka.

Then when they were dancing in the living room to the slow tune on the radio.

And now it was the end of the evening, proper night about to set in and still, the ring was burning a hole in his pocket.

She leans back against the iron railing, absently fidgeting with the gold pendant of her necklace, her glass of wine held in one hand.

Bucky is smoking, watching the light dance across her eyes.

Now.

He should ask her now, while she’s sated with food and wine, relaxed and happy.

The radio is still on inside, another slow song drifting on the air.

Just as he’s about to open his mouth, she yawns and stretches. “Thank you for this, kid,” she murmurs, turning to take his hand in hers. “I think this is our best date yet. And now we don’t gotta go anywhere to fool around. We’re already at home.” She reaches out to him, hooking careful fingers into the collar of his shirt, gaze dark and warm.

Bucky resists the hands pulling him forward, feels the words kept inside him all afternoon and evening bubbling to the surface.

“Y/N,” he whispers, watching the breeze ruffle the sleeve of her dress. She pauses at the desperation clear in his voice. “Honey, will you marry me?”

He doesn’t mean to just come out with it.

There were words he wanted to say, things he wanted to tell her, before he asked.

He doesn’t even have the ring in his hand.

He’d wanted to go down on one knee.

Bucky had wanted to do this one thing so right with her, when everything else about them was backwards and mixed up.

He tugs away from her hastily, scrabbling in the pocket of his trousers for the ring, which, come to think of it, isn’t even in a box.

The ring emerges and he shoves it at her, holds it out, where it catches the last rays of the sun before it sinks behind the building across the street. Blue shadows creep over them.

Y/N is staring at him, mouth rounded in surprise, before her eyes blink down to the ring, emerald and gold.

“Oh,” she whispers.

And that’s all she says.

Bucky panics, feels every biting worry swim up the back of his throat. No, she would say yes. He’d believed that she would, and she would.

“Sorry for springing this on you, doll. I had so much I wanted to say to you. I was going to take you ta that Italian place and get down on one knee in the middle of dinner and then I realized that I would hate that and you’d hate it even more.”

He swallows and tries not to panic, tries to keep his voice even and steady. Y/N slowly reaches out and lies a hand against his thigh, curling her fingers into his pant leg. She leans forward to look at the ring, like she’s afraid to touch it. “And then I kept tryin’ ta ask ya all afternoon and it just never came out. But I’m askin’ now. And I guess all I have ta really say is that I love you. And that I’m sorry it took me this long to ask you.”

She meets his eyes then, scooting closer to him on the fire escape until her legs are folded over his lap. “Ask me again please.”

Relief floods through him.

She’s going to say yes.

Bucky reaches out with his other hand, touches her cheek carefully.

“Will you marry me, Y/N?”

“Yeah, kid, I’ll marry you.” She reaches up, cupping his face between her palms to kiss him hard, slipping forward onto her knees to press close to him, and Bucky has to tilt his head up to follow her lips, her tongue urgently prodding into his mouth. “I’ve been ready to marry you since the moment I - you stupid man, yes. Of course I’ll marry you.”

Bucky wraps an arm around her waist and tugs her tight against him. “Thank god for that, sweetheart,” he smiles, relief making him loose with warmth. “Want your ring or not?”

She pulls back just enough to be able to proffer up her hand, watching intently as Bucky slips the ring into place.

Somehow, it fits her perfectly.

“It was a ring ma’s mother gave her. Not her engagement ring but a family one.”

“Did you ask your ma about marrying me?”

“‘Course. Shoulda heard her berate me for even bringin’ it up.”

She holds her hand out, admiring the ring. “Let’s get married tomorrow.”

“Ah, c’mon now hon. Steve’ll cry if he doesn’t get to stand up at my wedding. Ma and Bex’ll kill both of us if we do it without them. You’ll want your folks there too.”

“Just me and you. We can have a proper wedding some other time-,”

Bucky presses a hand to her back, soothes his fingers down her spine. “I promise I won’t make you wait so long to get married, honey. Please let me enjoy the fact that you said yes.”

“Were you worried I wouldn’t?”

“Worried ya’d turn down a wreck like me? No. ‘Course not,” he tries to joke.

She peers into his eyes, a delicate frown tugging at her lips, before she suddenly pulls away, gathering up the wine glasses, the clasp of cigarettes and lighter, before dropping through the window.

Bucky curses, following swiftly, heart in his throat, clattering the window shut behind him so the evening chill doesn't creep in before he closes the blinds.

But when he turns, he finds the love of his life already circling her arms around him, shoving him down on the couch, fingers on the curve of his jaw.

Not upset, not running away, just luring him in where they wouldn’t be seen.

Normally, she would already have her hand down the front of his trousers. But tonight, she just presses her full weight into him and kisses him like he’s her last dying breath, possessive, demanding hands sliding up his chest, pressing into his biceps. Careful and needful and claiming all at once.

“I love you, kid. Don’t ever doubt me.”

“‘S not so much you as me that I doubt sweetheart,” Bucky tugs up her skirt, presses his hands against the bare backs of her thighs. “Thought maybe it would make you realize how permanent this is to me. Make you realize you deserve better.”

“I deserve exactly you. It's never not been permanent to me, honey. I was always goin’ to be right here. I deserve you and you deserve me, kid, I promise that’s always been true.”

Bucky watches her prop her elbows on his chest, admiring the ring on her finger, like she didn’t just tell him something earth shattering. “Feels really right. Like it’s always been there.”

“Was. You just couldn’t see it.”

She doesn’t look at him as she asks quietly, “Could you?”