And we go beyond the farthest reaches
Where the light bends and wraps beneath us
And I know as you collapse into me
This is the start of something
Pairings: windowed single dad!Toji x divorced!Reader(F)
Summary: His wife died a year ago and Toji Fushiguro has felt like his life has been on autopilot since then. Every day is just the same continuous loop.
Your marriage ended five months ago, four years down the drain. And now you find yourself living with your sister and brother-in-law, trying to pick up the pieces of your crumbling life back up.
A chance meeting brings these two broken souls together.
Trigger Warnings for Chapter: I'm going to be honest here and say none, really. There is a lot of fluff though and a lot of reader and Megumi interaction in this chapter.
You and Toji did eventually manage to wrangle the children out of the gymnasium and down to the cafeteriaāthough not before Megumi and Aimee somehow talked the two of you into two more games.
What could you say? You were weak to Aimee and her puppy eyes.
Apparently, Megumiās too.
Toji had mentioned that Megumi inherited them from Kyouka.
The two of them used to love double-teaming him with that trick.
You had to bite back a laugh at the image aloneāToji standing there with his arms crossed over his chest, feet planted firmly as he tried to hold his ground, while Megumi and Kyouka stood in front of him tag-teaming him with matching puppy eyes and pouts.
From the number of times youād caved to Aimeeās puppy dog eyes, you could only imagine how often Toji folded when both his wife and son used the same tactic on him.
Because if you were being honest, it had been more than enough with just your niece.
And reallyāwhat were you supposed to do about that?
And little Megumi was an absolute cutie.
So yesāyou knew Toji caved often.
And you could have brought it up. The urge sat right on the tip of your tongue.
But you decided to save that particular conversation for another time.
As you, Toji, and the kids sat around the circular lunch table, you sipped your cold Sprite and glanced around at the other occupied tables scattered through the cafeteria.
Parents sat with their childrenāsome dressed in costumes, others in regular clothesāall of them smiling as they enjoyed the eveningās festivities.
At another table tucked in the far corner of the room sat a group of teenagers, their laughter carrying across the cafeteria.
It was obvious they were some of the volunteers helping run the festival.
Aimee and Megumi sat between you and TojiāAimee beside you, Megumi beside his fatherāboth happily occupied with their corn dogs and chocolate milk.
Megumi happily sipped on his chocolate milk, his eyes fixed on Aimee as she munched on her corn dog. Between bites, the young girl chatted away to the boy beside her, a bright smile stretched across her face.
Megumi said little as he ate, content to sip his milk and take bites of his own corn dog. He nodded along and answered verbally whenever necessary.
Aimee, of course, had no issue doing enough talking for the both of them.
And out of everything you loved about your niece, that was one of the things you adored mostāhow much she could talk.
Aimee was a social butterfly through and through. She had no trouble making friends and hardly ever met a strangerāmuch to yours and Sukunaās constant wish that she might be just a little more bashful.
But Aimee was her parents combined.
She hated seeing anyone left out and never minded filling the silence for people who struggled to do it themselves.
Much like she was doing now with Megumi.
Megumi wasnāt nearly as social as Aimee, but neither of them seemed bothered by their differences. They simply enjoyed each otherās company.
Beside his son, Toji sat eating chips while scrolling through his phone. At first glance, he looked entirely absorbed in his own world, but the slight upward curve of his scarred lip and the quiet huff of amusement gave him away.
He was listening to the kids.
You had to admit, thoughāthe topic Aimee and Megumi were bouncing between was pretty amusing. Mostly because it never stayed the same for long. Aimee kept jumping from one thing to the next without missing a beat.
As the kids continued eating and talking, you and Toji filled the time with small conversations of your own. Nothing seriousājust passing comments here and there. That was, of course, whenever one of you wasnāt pausing to answer one of the kids when they chimed in and interrupted.
Youād respond, then slip right back into your own conversation like nothing happened.
Once Aimee and Megumi finished their food and milk, the four of you cleaned up and made your way toward the auditorium.
A few people were already seated when you arrived, with more trickling in behind you to grab spots for the contest.
A young girl approached, a bright smile on her face. Her black hair was styled into space buns, and her brown eyes seemed to shine even in the dim lighting.
She introduced herself as Tsui, one of the volunteers helping run the festival. She explained that sheād be leading the kids participating in the costume contest backstage to get them ready.
Tsui gently took both Aimeeās and Megumiās hands, speaking to them in a soft, reassuring voice.
Before she could lead them away, you leaned down and pressed a kiss to Aimeeās cheek, telling her youād be waiting in the audience. Beside you, Toji crouched in front of Megumi, murmuring something quietly to his son. You didnāt catch the words, but you could guessāencouragement.
He stood back up, adjusting Megumiās cap on his head before letting him go.
Then Tsui led them off to get ready.
After that, you and Toji found your seats, choosing ones closer to the front so both kids would be able to spot you easily from the stage.
A few more people trickled into the auditorium, and a couple minutes later, the contest began. One of the teachers stepped up to give a brief opening announcement before introducing the first category.
You had to admit, the kids had put a lot of thought into their costumes.
Sure, you could tell a good number of them came straight from places like Walmart or Spirit Halloweenābut the makeup choices that went along with them were impressive. And some of the children, especially the older ones, showed off their own skillsāor their parentsāāwith detailed homemade costumes.
And no matter the results, every child wore a wide smile across their face. It was obvious they all wanted to winābut more than that, they were having fun, whether they placed or not.
That alone had you smiling.
It also had your thoughts drifting back to your own time at festivals like this.
Tamsy hadnāt been lying when she told Aimee how much fun the two of you used to have.
But unlike these kidsāunlike Aimee or Megumiājoining a contest had never been something you even tried. You hated being stared at. Truthfully, you had been a shy kid.
Youād managed to become best friends with Kento and Utahime fairly easily the first day you met them. And sure, you had a few other friends here and there over the years. And, of course, there had been that one relationship with the man who ended up ruining your life.
But you were never like Tamsy.
She had always been the adventurous oneāthe outgoing one. Maybe part of that came from her being older, but you knew better. That was just who she was.
Tamsy had always been the one to enter contests at festivalsāwhether it was costumes like this or submitting artwork to be judged. And it didnāt stop there. She joined talent shows whenever the school held them, took Drama classes, and landed parts in plays.
She had more than enough friends growing up tooāthough sheād only call half of them acquaintances. According to her, her only real friends were Shoko and, coincidentally, Kyouka.
And with your sister being friends with Shoko and Kyouka, that meant she was also friends with Shiu and Toji.
And, of course, Ryomen as wellāconsidering he was your brother-in-law.
Youād only recently learned about Satoru and Suguru, since theyād been friends with Shoko since childhood.
They always did things together.
Sometimes Tamsy would offer to let you tag alongāwhether they were going to a movie or just walking around the mall. She never minded including you. Even Ryomen, who always seemed to drop the bad boy act around you and Tamsy, would try to convince you to come with them.
You didnāt want to intrude, and eventually everyone just assumed you preferred to keep to yourself.
The truth was, you did want to go. Being labeled the shy one between you and your sister got old fast. But no matter how many times they asked, you could never quite bring yourself to say yes.
Sometimes you had an excuseāplans with Kento and Utahime.
Other times, you just didnāt want to be āTamsyās little sisterā tagging along behind them.
And after you started dating your ex-husband, you barely had time for anything that didnāt involve him.
So when Toji admitted, the first day you met him at the shop, that he hadnāt even known whether you were a boy or a girlāit made sense.
Tamsy had always just referred to you as her sibling. Never your name. Never your gender.
And since Ryomen had always been completely wrapped around your sisterās finger, he went along with itānever correcting anyone, never saying anything to the others either.
Not until years later, when you ended up working at the shop with all of them.
Apparently, at some point during your inner rambling, your smile had slipped. Anyone could tell you were lost in your thoughts.
Especially the man sitting beside you.
You jolted slightly when a knee bumped yours, and you turned to look at Toji. A playful grin was already on his face.
āEasy, Pip,ā he said, amusement lacing his tone. āDonāt fall out of your seat.ā
You fought the blush threatening to spread across your cheeks and cleared your throat, shifting in your seat. Crossing one leg over the other, you folded your hands neatly in your lap.
āSorry about that,ā you said softly, just loud enough for him to hear. āI got a little stuck in my head.ā
On stage, another group of costumed children stepped out from backstage, taking their places under the lights.
Toji leaned back in his seat, arms crossing over his chest as he adjusted to avoid bumping the woman beside him. Even then, his attention stayed on you.
āI can see that,ā he replied. āGood stuck in your head or bad?ā
His tone was laced with just enough concern to make your stomach flutter.
It was⦠nice. The fact that he noticed. That he paid enough attention to catch the shift in your moodāespecially when you didnāt always realize it yourself.
So the check-in didnāt go unnoticed.
āIt was good,ā you answered, a small smile returning to your lips. āI was just thinking about how much fun I had at these festivals growing up.ā
Toji didnāt say anythingāhe just kept his eyes on you.
Like he knew there was more.
You shrugged lightly. āAnd⦠I guess that turned into me thinking about how I missed out on a lot of stuff because I was really shy,ā you admitted.
āThereās nothing wrong with being a little shy,ā Toji said, his tone softer, trying to reassure you. āMost kids are.ā
āIām not saying there is,ā you replied with a small sigh. āI just⦠ended up missing out on a lot because of it. It made me stick to myself more than I should haveāmade me way too introverted.ā
āIām sure you werenāt that bad, Pip.ā
You glanced at him. āHow many times did Tamsy or Ryomen say they tried to get me to tag along with you guys, and I never went?ā
Toji didnāt answer right away.
His smile faded just slightly as he tilted his head, brows knitting together while he actually thought about it.
āIt was a few times,ā he admitted after a moment, green eyes settling back on you. He shrugged. āI never really thought much of it. Sheād say she invited you, you said noāthat was about it. Most of the time she said you had other plans.ā
āMost of the time, I did,ā you said. āIād hang out with Kento and Utahime, and when I started dating my ex-husband, most of my time went to him.ā You paused, then added more quietly, āBut other times⦠I just felt like Iād be intruding.ā
Tojiās head tilted again. āIntruding? How?ā
You shrugged, more than willing to leave it at that.
Toji, apparently, wasnāt.
āA shrugās not really an answer, Y/N.ā
āIt could be an answer.ā
Toji just kept looking at you.
You rolled your eyes and let out a quiet sigh.
āFine,ā you relented, slouching slightly in your seat as the wooden chair creaked under the shift of your weight.
āI just felt like if I did tag along whenever Tamsy or Ryomen invited me, Iād be intruding,ā you continued. āAnd I know neither of them mindedāand Iām sure none of you wouldāve eitherābut I just couldnāt make myself say yes. Yeah, part of it was because I was a shy kid. But the other partā¦ā You hesitated. āI didnāt want to risk being āTamsyās little sisterā that you guys were just tolerating. Like youād rather I stayed home, but were too nice to say it.ā
You exhaled softly. āAnd then there was the whole sixth wheel thing. Or ninth, if Satoru and Suguru were there.ā
Toji raised a brow, his head still tilted. āYou really think thatās how we wouldāve felt?ā
You shrugged again, turning your attention back to the stage. Another group of kids stepped out from behind the curtain. From the looks of it, there were only one or two groups left before Aimee and Megumiās category.
āYes,ā you finally admitted, still not looking at him. āI did. I mean⦠you all were five years older than me. I didnāt think a bunch of eighteen-year-olds would want a thirteen-year-old tagging along.ā
Toji was the one to shrug his shoulders this time.Ā
"I wouldn't have minded," he admitted. You turned your head to look at him, now tilting yours. He huffed a laugh. "I'm serious. I wouldn't have."
"You might not have minded, I'm not sure the others would have had the same mindset."
"I'm sure Kyouka would have adored you," Toji admitted. "She probably would have taken you under her wing and treated you like the sister she never had--which would have been true because she was an only child. And the way Shiu talks about you now, he would have liked you back then too. No doubt Shoko, too." He thought for a moment before adding, "Did they not ever come to your house to hang out with your sister or something? Shiu said he and Shoko knew about you way before me and the dumbass twins."
"Oh, yeah, Shoko came around all the time to the house," you answered. "Kyouka would come every now and again. Sometimes Shiu would come with Shoko if he knew Ryomen was going to be at the house. So, yeah, they knew about me before you, Satoru and Suguru did. I just usually stayed in my room unless I was with Utahime and Kento."
Toji hummed, like he was actually turning your words over in his head.
āI still wouldnāt have minded,ā he said after a moment. āNone of us would have. Especially dumbass Gojo and his partner-in-crime Geto. Those two knuckleheads like you now.ā
You huffed out a laugh. āI think Suguru likes me for normal reasons,ā you said, amusement threading your tone. āSatoru, on the other hand⦠Iām pretty sure he just acts like that because heās flirting and thinks Iām going to be the next one warming his bed.ā
āHeās a dumbass, but heās not a suicidal one,ā Toji said, his voice turning firm, the humor dropping out of it.
That caught your attention, making you glance at him.
āIf that snowflake even tries to push it with you,ā he continued, āheāll have more than just Ryomen to deal with. And Suguru wonāt be able to save him either. Because Iāll beat his ass.ā
You werenāt entirely sure what he meant by that.
Not that you actually thought Satoru would seriously try anythingāthough you wouldnāt put it past him to test his luck. Still, after everything with Ai, Ryomen had made it very clear to everyone at the shop where the line was when it came to you.
Playful flirting? Irritating to him, sureābut he tolerated it to a point. And he was quick to step in the second it crossed into something more, usually before you even had the chance to show it bothered you.
Most of the time, you didnāt mind it anyway. Youād even play alongāflirting back in your own way.
Unfortunately, Satoru was the type that, if you gave him an inch, heād take it a mile.
Now, Satoru wasnāt a bad guy. He really wasnātāyouād told yourself that a million times over the past few months working at the shop.
He was caring, funny, and always trying to make you laugh. Helpful, too, with a genuinely big heart.
He just⦠tended to think with his dick more than his brain.
And again, you really didnāt think heād be stupid enough to seriously cross a boundary. Which only made you wonder why Toji had sounded so serious just nowāwhy heād felt the need to threaten the white-haired menace in the first place.
You didnāt get the chance to ask.
The moment you opened your mouth, Tsui appeared, making her way quickly over to where you and Toji were seated.
āI need your help, Mr. Fushiguro,ā she said, concern clear in her voice.
Toji was already starting to rise from his seat. āIs everything okay? Is something wrong with Megumi?ā
You stood as well, stepping aside from the aisle seat so he could get out.
āIn a sense, heās fine,ā Tsui said, leading the two of you toward the stage. āBut when we were getting the kids ready for the Buddy Category, he just⦠shut down. He backed himself into a corner backstage and wonāt move. Heās crouched down, hiding his face.ā
At her words, you and Toji quickened your pace. Tsui stayed right behind you as she led you up the short set of steps and backstage.
Your eyes immediately began scanning the area, searching through the other children for Megumi.
It didnāt take long to find him.
He was tucked into a corner, crouched down with his arms wrapped tightly around his knees, his face hidden. His baseball cap sat abandoned beside him.
Aimee was crouched in front of him.
You could see her lips moving as she spoke softly, trying to coax him out of itābut all Megumi did was shake his head, the only response he gave her.
You stayed back as Toji made his way over, crouching down in front of his son. Aimee turned at the movement, spotting you almost immediately, and hurried over. The second she reached you, her arms wrapped around your waist.
āWhat happened with Megumi, sweet girl?ā you asked softly, running your fingers through her hair.
Aimee tilted her head up at you, resting her chin against your stomach, a worried frown pulling at her lips.
āI donāt know,ā she said. āWe were just standing around waiting, and some of us wanted to see how many people were sitting out there. Megumi came with me, and then he just⦠started acting weird.ā
She shrugged. āI donāt know. One minute he was laughing with me, and then the nextāafter he saw how many people were out thereāhe went really pale.ā She paused. āLike I do when I get sick, Obasan.ā
You glanced back over to where Megumi was still crouched in the corner, arms wrapped tightly around his knees, his face hidden. Toji remained in front of him, speaking quietly, his lips moving in an attempt to coax some kind of response from his son.
āHe wouldnāt talk to me either,ā Aimee added after a moment, her voice soft as she looked back at him. āHe just pressed himself against the wall and did⦠that.ā She hesitated. āI hope heās going to be okay.ā
You leaned slightly to the side, peeking around the curtain that separated backstage from the main stage.
From where you stood, you could see the podium where the teacher had been announcing each category and prizeāand beyond that, the audience.
Far more than a child could comfortably handle.
Especially a child like Megumi.
And the moment you and Toji had come up those steps with Tsuiāwhen you saw him curled in on himself like thatāyou recognized it immediately.
That kind of body language wasnāt unfamiliar to you.
Youād been in that exact same position beforeācrouched down, trying to make yourself smaller. Trying to disappear.
The thought of that many eyes on you used to send your nerves spiraling, panic clawing its way up your throat until all you could think about was getting away.
Just like Megumi was doing now.
āIām sure heāll be just fine, Aimee,ā you said softly, running your hand through her hair once more. āIām going to go talk to him, okay?ā
Aimee didnāt say anything, only nodded. She let go of your waist but reached for your hand instead, her smaller fingers wrapping around yours as the two of you made your way over.
Tojiās voice carried softly as he tried to coax his son into respondingātrying to get anything out of him. The worry on his face was unmistakable as he watched the boy.
You gave Aimeeās hand a gentle squeeze before letting go, stepping forward and crouching down beside Toji.
āCome on, kiddo,ā he tried again, his voice low and gentle. āJust tell me what happenedāif youāre okay. I canāt fix anything if you donāt tell me whatās wrong, buddy.ā
Megumi stayed silent, only curling tighter around himself.
Toji let out a quiet sigh, dragging a hand down his face before resting it against his chin. He glanced over at you.
āHe wonāt talk to me,ā he muttered, his voice slightly muffled.
You offered him a small, reassuring smile, resting your hand lightly on his arm.
āLet me try something,ā you said softly before turning your full attention to Megumi.
You looked back at the small boy, and your heart ached.
Your smile wavered for just a second, but you kept it there.
āThereās a lot of people out there, huh?ā you said gently.
You didnāt expect an answerāand the way he curled in tighter confirmed it.
āThatās okay,ā you continued softly. āIām not going to make you talk. I promise. I just wanted to tell you⦠I know how you feel right now, sweet boy.ā
Megumi stayed quiet, his arms still wrapped around his knees, his face hidden.
āI had a hard time with crowds when I was about your age,ā you went on. The memory surfaced easilyāMs. Ito crouched in front of you, speaking softly, making you feel seen. Letting you know you werenāt the only one who felt that way.
So you tried to do the same for him.
āIn fact,ā you added, āI had a hard time with a lot of things. I was really shy, and new situations scared me so much Iād panic the second I was faced with them.ā
You glanced briefly at Toji, catching the unreadable look on his face before turning your attention back to Megumi.
āIād run and hide the first chance I got.ā
Megumiās grip around his knees loosened, just slightly.
Not much. But enough to count as progress.
āA lot of people thought I was being silly or overreacting,ā you continued.
You shifted, lowering yourself onto your knees before settling beside Megumi, pulling your own knees up to your chest.
āI always got labeled a crybaby⦠a scaredy-cat,ā you went on quietly. āBut no one really knew what was going on in my headāhow it actually felt. All they saw was a little girl⦠and later a teenager⦠trying to make herself small because she felt like she took up too much space. Like her nerves were just⦠an inconvenience.ā
The memories came easyāpressing yourself against walls at crowded events, trying to disappear when you couldnāt find someone you felt safe with. The way panic would hit the second you lost sight of your sister or your parents, even for a moment.
But they were also overwhelming.
You leaned your head back against the wall behind you, letting out a quiet breath.
āI used to wish I could be outgoing like my sister,ā you admitted softly. āShe lit up every room she walked intoālike a star. I wanted to be like that so badly⦠but I wasnāt. I was too introverted. And I hated feeling like everyone was looking at meālike I was being forced into the center of attention.ā
You glanced over at the boy beside you.
āThatās what happened to you, wasnāt it, Megumi?ā you asked softly.
For a moment, you expected nothingāexpected him to curl in tighter, maybe even pull away.
āā¦yeah,ā he whispered a second later, his voice barely audible.
You watched as he still hugged his knees, but slowly lifted his head, revealing his eyesāgreen, just like his fatherās.
He turned slightly, resting the side of his face against his arms so he could look at you. And you could see it clearly nowāthe red rims, the shine of tears he was trying so hard to hold back.
āThereās so many people out there,ā he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. āTheyāre all going to be looking at meā¦ā
You gently lowered your legs, shifting into a cross-legged position before offering your hand out to him.
āCome here, sweetheart,ā you said softly.
Megumi didnāt move right away. His gaze flickered between your hand and your face.
And after a moment, he slowly uncurled, crawling forward until he settled into your lap. He leaned back against you, still tenseābut gradually beginning to relax.
You glanced up over Megumiās spiky hair, meeting Tojiās gaze.
He was watching the two of you, completely still. His expression was unreadable, giving nothing away.
Beside him, Aimee stood with her hands tucked behind her back, her head tilted as she observed the same scene. Unlike Toji, her expression was easy to readācurious, quietly attentive.
You couldnāt tell what he was thinking.
You turned your hands so your palms faced up, resting them on either side of Megumi.
āHold my hands,ā you said gently.
He slipped his smaller hands into yours, fingers threading together. You gave a small nod. āGood boy. Now close your eyes and keep leaning back against me, okay?ā
Megumi nodded. āOkay.ā
You watched as his eyes shut, his body easing just a little more into yours.
āAlright,ā you murmured, your voice soft and steady. āWeāre going to breathe together, okay? In through your nose⦠nice and slow⦠and then out through your mouth.ā
You kept your breathing steady, letting him match your rhythm.
It was something your parents used to do for you when your nerves got the better of youāwhen everything felt like too much. If it was just you and Tamsy, sheād do the same thing.
Theyād guide you somewhere quieter, sit you down, and pull you closeāon their lap when you were younger, between their legs when you got older. Just like this.
In through your nose. Out through your mouth.
Over and over, until the tightness in your chest eased, until the tension drained from your body, and your thoughts finally slowed enough to let you breathe again.
A small smile spread across your face the moment you felt the tension leave Megumiās body. Even after youād stopped guiding him, he kept up the steady rhythm on his own.
āYou know,ā you said softly, your thumbs brushing slow, soothing circles over the backs of his gloved hands, āmy parents and my big sister used to do this for me too when I was growing up.ā
āDid you get really nervous a lot when you were little?ā Megumi asked quietly, tilting his head back to look at you. His eyes were open now, clearer than before.
You met his gaze and nodded. āA whole lot,ā you admitted. āSometimes Iād get so nervous it felt like I couldnāt breatheālike someone was squeezing me too tight and I couldnāt get any air in.ā You offered him a gentle smile. āIs that how it felt for you? Is that why you tried to make yourself small against the wall?ā
Megumi nodded. āYeah. I saw how many people were in the seats and I started feeling funny in my chest.ā
āBecause you knew that once you stepped on stage, theyād all be looking at you?ā
āI donāt like that,ā he murmured. āI donāt like so many people staring at me.ā
āI donāt blame you,ā you told him gently. āHaving that many people looking at you all at once⦠it makes you feel weird, doesnāt it?ā
āMhm,ā Megumi murmured, nodding again.
He lifted his head, his gaze shifting past Tojiālanding on Aimee.
āI really wanted to do this with Aimee though.ā
āYou wanna know something?ā
Megumi looked back at you, tilting his head. āWhat?ā
āYou did something I never even dreamed of doing at your age,ā you told him. Your gaze lifted briefly to Toji and Aimee before settling back on him. āJust thinking about entering a contest like this used to make my skin crawlālike a bunch of spiders were dumped on me and crawling everywhere.ā You gave him a small, reassuring smile. āEven if it overwhelmed you, you were still braver than I ever was back then.ā
Megumi frowned slightly. āBut I still got scared⦠and had that weird feeling in my chest. So I canāt be brave.ā
āYou are brave, buddy,ā Toji cut in.
Both you and Megumi looked over at him. He gave his son a small, steady smile.
āDoing something outside your comfort zone? Thatās one of the bravest things you can do.ā
āYeah, Gumi!ā Aimee chimed in, her voice bright again.
She stepped closer, stopping in front of you and Megumi with her hands still tucked behind her back, smiling down at him.
āI was really happy when you said youād do the contest with me,ā she added. āI didnāt know if youād want to or not.ā
āI wanted to,ā Megumi told her. Then, quieter, āI really did. I justā¦ā
āItās okay that you got a little scared,ā you said gently. Megumi looked up at you, and you ran your hand through his hair, the same way you always did with Aimee. āThereās nothing wrong with that.ā
āPipās right,ā Toji added, shifting a little closer. āAnd if you want to head back to the gym and play some games instead, we can do that. No oneās gonna be upset.ā
āI wonāt be!ā Aimee said quickly, her smile still bright. āWe can go back to playing games and getting candy if you want, Gumi. Iāve had fun just dressing up with you.ā
āItās up to you, sweetheart,ā you told him gently, still running your fingers through his hair. āWhatever you want to do, okay?ā
Megumi stayed quiet for a moment, his gaze dropping to where your hands were still intertwined.
āIā¦ā he started slowly. āIāI want to do the contest with Aimeeā¦ā
He hesitated, searching for the rest of his words. āI want to, butā¦ā
āIf you want to be part of the contest, then thatās okay,ā you reassured him. He looked back up at you. āYou can still do it and have fun with Aimee.ā
āWhat if I get scared again?ā
You smiled softly. āThen how about this,ā you said. āIf you start to feel overwhelmed, you grab Aimeeās hand. And you look out into the crowd for me and your dad. Just focus on usāand on Aimee squeezing your hand.ā
Megumi stayed quiet for a moment, his gaze drifting away again as his brows knitted together in thought.
āOr,ā you added gently, āif youād rather, your dad and I can stay right here backstage. That way, you can just look to your left and see us behind the curtain.ā
Megumiās gaze flickered between you and Toji, then over to Aimee, before settling back on your hands.
āCouldā¦ā he started, his voice uncertain.
āWhat is it, bud?ā Toji asked gently, giving him the space to take his time.
Megumi nodded to himself, then slowly lifted his head, green eyes meeting his fatherās.
āCould⦠could you go back and sit with the others, Daddy?ā he asked, his voice barely above a whisper. Then he turned to you. āAnd could you⦠stay back here so I know youāre behind the curtain, Y/N?ā
āWould that make you feel better, Megumi?ā you asked softly.
He didnāt answer out loudājust nodded.
You glanced up at Toji, meeting his eyes. āI think we can do that for him, donāt you?ā
Toji just smiled, his eyes still on yours.
āYeah,ā he said. Then he shifted his attention back to his son. āYeah, we can do that.ā
You helped Megumi up from your lap before reaching beside you to grab his baseball cap. You dusted it off lightly, then placed it back on his head, completing his costume.
Toji opened his arms, and Megumi stepped into them without hesitation. His small arms wrapped around his fatherās neck while Toji pulled him close, holding him securely.
Toji leaned down, his lips near Megumiās ear, speaking softlyāquiet enough that only the two of them could hear.
When they pulled apart, Toji gave his sonās back a reassuring rub before standing to his full height. He reached out and gently tapped Aimee on the nose, careful not to smudge her face paint, earning a small giggle from her.
Then his attention shifted to you.
That same grateful smile lingered as he gave you a small nod before glancing back at Megumi, silently letting him know heād be in the front rowāeasy to spot.
You took Megumiās hand and guided him over to the curtain. Pulling it back just enough, you let him peek out as Toji made his way to an open seat near the front.
The moment Megumiās focus drifted from his father to the crowd, you felt his hand tense in yours.
You gave it a gentle squeeze.
He looked up at you, a small frown on his face, and you offered him a reassuring smileāreminding him that his dad was right there, and that youād be just behind the curtain where he could still see you.
Megumiās expression softened.
Then he smiled, giving your hand a small squeeze in return.
Aimee stepped over and took Megumiās other hand, her smaller fingers wrapping around his. The two of them looked at each other, smiling, and Aimee let out a soft giggle.
You released Megumiās hand and stepped back, giving them space as they moved into place with the other children on stage.
At the podium, the teacher began speaking, introducing the Buddy Category. Applause rippled through the audience as each pair was calledācostumes first, then their names.
You stayed off to the side, just like you promised, your hands resting behind your back.
Your eyes never left Megumi and Aimee.
And you knew Tojiās didnāt either.
You watched as Megumi craned his neck, searching through the crowd until his eyes landed on his father. His hand tightened around Aimeeās, their fingers interlocked as he gave her a small squeeze.
Then he turned, looking off to the sideālooking for you.
You smiled the moment his eyes found yours, giving him a small wave to remind him you were right there, just like you promised.
A second later, a smile spread across his face.
He lifted his free hand and waved back.
Beside him, Aimee leaned forward, waving enthusiastically with her own free hand, and you returned it just as easily.
The teacher soon called their names, introducing them as Ash and Pikachu. Applause filled the auditorium, and from the front row came loud claps and a couple of sharp whistlesāToji making it very clear he was cheering them on.
You clapped too, making sure your applause carried from where you stood off to the side.
Aimee and Megumi both lit up, smiling brightly as they waved to the audience with their free hands, their other hands still tightly linked.
The smile on Megumiās face made your chest warm.
You knew he was going to be okay.
They didnāt win the grand prize, but both kids received medals for their costumes.
The top spot went to a pair of twin brothers dressed as Mario and Luigi.
Aimee and Megumi didnāt seem to care at all about the results. Both of them were beaming, their medals hanging proudly around their necks as they talked animatedlyāvoices overlapping, eyes bright.
Megumi looked nothing like the boy from earlier. His smile was wide, his green eyes lit up as he sat beside Aimee, completely at ease.
Toji stood off to the side, arms crossed over his chest as he watched them. There was a quiet smile on his face.
You had stepped away to the restroom, leaving Aimee with him for the momentāsomething he hadnāt minded in the slightest.
Seeing Megumi like this eased something in him.
Because earlier⦠he hadnāt known what to do.
Nothing he said had gotten through to his son.
Not until you stepped in.
And Toji had to admit⦠it had been something to watch.
The way you handled Megumiāgentle, patient. Giving him space, but still reaching him. Getting him to talk, to breathe, to come out of that tight, closed-off place heād tucked himself into.
Toji couldnāt quite put a name to the feeling that came with watching his son open up to you.
Because hearing Megumi explain itāhearing how overwhelmed heād gotten, how the crowd made his chest feel tight, how it scared himā
Because it wasnāt the first time.
Megumi had reacted like that once before, years ago, when he was around five. Heād tried to participate in a small class program. The crowd hadnāt even been half the size of tonightās, but it had still been too much.
Toji remembered it clearly.
Megumi hadnāt even made it through the start. Heād broken down before it beganāsmall body shaking, curling in on itself as tears took over.
And Toji had no choice but to carry him off the stage.
And Toji was grateful for youāeven if his face hadnāt shown it in the moment.
The way you spoke to Megumi, soft and steady, the way you encouraged him without pushingāit stuck with him.
It did something to him, too.
A feeling he hadnāt let himself sit with in a long time. Not since Kyouka.
There had been something warm in his chest as he watched it all unfold. Something quiet, but heavy in a way he couldnāt ignore.
Especially when Megumi finally movedāwhen he crawled into your lap like it was the safest place he could be.
Toji had felt it deepen then.
Watching you take his sonās hands, your fingers lacing with his, guiding him through each breath. Patient. Gentle. Like it was second nature to you.
You didnāt rush him. Didnāt overwhelm him. You just⦠met him where he was.
And when you explainedāhow it was something your own family used to do for you, how it helped when everything felt too muchā
Not just on the surface, but in a way that meant something.
You just wanted Megumi to feel safe.
To calm down. To breathe. And Toji knew that.
There werenāt words strong enough for Toji to explain just how grateful he was for you.
Not in a way that felt like it would be enough.
It wasnāt long before you made your way back into the gym, returning to where he stood with the kids. Your smile was still there, easy and bright.
Both Aimee and Megumi immediately turned toward you, greeting you the second you stepped close.
You greeted them right back, a soft laugh slipping past your lips.
And Toji found himself stuck on it. The sound lingeredālight, warm.
Like something he hadnāt realized heād missed hearing until now.
And, for a moment, he couldnāt help but think⦠he wouldnāt mind hearing it again.
The festival was winding down, teachers and student volunteers beginning to take apart the remaining games.
Aimee and Megumi had begged for just a little more timeāone or two more games, and a trip through the spook tunnel before it closed.
You and Toji had played it up, pretending to think it over, exchanging glances while the kids stood there with wide eyes and pouty lips, clinging politely to both of you.
It didnāt take long before you both gave in.
The second you agreed, they cheered and took off toward the games, still holding hands as they ran. Their laughter carried as they reached the bowling booth.
And just like that, it was just you and Toji againāstanding off to the side, watching them.
āHow do you think the spook tunnel is going to go?ā you asked after a moment, your tone playful, hands tucked behind your back.
Toji hummed, tilting his head like he was seriously considering it. A second later, he let out a quiet huff of laughter.
āIām sensing a lot of screaming,ā he said, a smirk tugging at his lips as he glanced at you. āSomething tells me it wonāt be from either of the kids, though.ā
You snorted. āOh, you think Iām the one whoās going to get spooked by a bunch of teenagers in costumes?ā you shot back, rolling your eyes, amusement clear in your tone. āSounds like youāre compensating for something there.ā
Toji snorted this time, rolling his eyes in return. āIām not compensating for anything, Pip,ā he said. āIām just making an observation.ā
āItās not much of an observation if you already decided Iām the one getting spooked in a tunnel run by teenagers.ā
He shrugged. āTomatoes, toe-mah-toes.ā
You laughed. āNo. No, noāthat does not apply here.ā
Toji chuckled under his breath as the two of you turned your attention back to Aimee and Megumi. The kids bounced from one last game to another, collecting candy and laughing the whole time.
A quiet, easy silence settled between you.
āHey, Pip,ā Toji said after a moment.
You hummed softly in acknowledgment, eyes still on the kids.
He cleared his throat. āI, uh⦠wanted to thank you. For earlierāwith Megumi.ā
You turned away from where Aimee and Megumi had made their way to a game of Connect Four, glancing up at him instead. Your head tilted slightly, a soft smile resting on your lips.
āYou donāt need to thank me, āji,ā you said gently.
Your gaze drifted back to the kids. āI just saw he needed a little help and⦠I knew what he was going through.ā
After a moment, you added more quietly, āThat was one of the harder parts about being as shy as I was growing up. It didnāt take much for my anxiety to flare up.ā
You looked back at him, giving a small shrug. āThat breathing thing? My parents came up with it after I had a really bad panic attack not long after we moved from Yokohama to Tokyo. I thought Iād be fineāconvinced my seven-year-old self I had it all under control.ā A faint, almost amused breath left you. āBut my first big downtown event proved me very wrong.ā
You let out a quiet sigh, shifting your weight as you moved your arms from behind your back and crossed them over your chest.
āSo,ā you continued, āI just⦠didnāt want to see him like that.ā
A small, soft smile pulled at Tojiās lips.
Megumi wasnāt yours. Not really. Just a kid connected to you through him.
And that⦠meant more than he could put into words.
āEither way,ā he said, and you glanced back at him, āIām still thanking you for it. And thereās no way for me to explain how much I appreciate it.ā
You smiled again. āIād do it for him anytime, āji,ā you said, and you meant it. He could hear it in your voice. āBut⦠youāre welcome. Since youāre set on thanking me. Even if you donāt have to.ā
Silence settled between you againāeasy, not uncomfortable.
This time, you were the one to break it.
āHeās a sweet kid,ā you said, watching as Aimee and Megumi moved to their final game of the night. āAnd honestly, Toji⦠I wouldāve done anything to bring that smile back to his face.ā
Toji didnāt have anything to say to that.
He just watched you, that unfamiliar feeling settling in his chest againāsomething he couldnāt quite name.
He shook it off as the two of you slipped back into light conversation, both of you keeping an eye on the kids.
When Aimee and Megumi came running back over, they reached for you without hesitation.
Aimee taking your hand was nothing new.
Megumi doing it too⦠that was.
It caught you off guard. It caught Toji off guard.
But neither of you let it show.
You just smiled down at them, falling into easy conversation as you started leading the way out of the gym, heading toward the locker room where the spook tunnel was set up.
Toji followed a step behind, hands in his pockets, watching.
Watching the way Megumi stuck close to you.
The way his eyes were bright again, his smile wide, his words tumbling out as he talked to you like nothing had happened earlier.
And youājust as naturalātalked right back, giving him your full attention.
Aimee chimed in too, of course, bouncing between both of you like always.
And for the first time that night, everything felt⦠settled.
Toji couldnāt help the way something fluttered in his chest as he watched you with the kids.
He shook his head, pushing the feeling down as he continued walking behind the three of you.
And to end the nightāwhen the four of you stepped into the spook tunnelāthe kids definitely screamed.
But they werenāt the only ones.
There were a few startled gruntsāalmost cursesāthat slipped out too.
And they most definitely did not come from you.
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