This is some of the best comedy delivery conceivable
That's someone who knows their daughter. Love this.
The undiluted savagery from her mother is effortlessly world-weary /iconic đđđđ¤Ł

#extradirty
occasionally subtle

Game Changer & Make Some Noise
Aqua Utopiaď˝ćľˇăŽĺşă§č¨ćśăç´Ąă

Product Placement

almost home
Fai_Ryy
TMBGareOK. The Official They Might Be Giants tumblr
tumblr dot com

Love Begins
Cosmic Funnies

Origami Around
Sade Olutola
cherry valley forever

PR's Tumblrdome

oozey mess
Noah Kahan
macklin celebrini has autism

seen from TĂźrkiye
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Ukraine
seen from Germany
seen from Switzerland
seen from TĂźrkiye

seen from United States
seen from Malaysia

seen from Bangladesh

seen from United States
seen from Brazil

seen from United States

seen from United States
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seen from Australia
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seen from TĂźrkiye
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@danibearwolfe
This is some of the best comedy delivery conceivable
That's someone who knows their daughter. Love this.
The undiluted savagery from her mother is effortlessly world-weary /iconic đđđđ¤Ł

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
Actual Reasons Why People Were Dumped
is this post secret
Reblog this picture of me holding a Family Size box of Honey Nut Cheerios? Iâd really appreciate it.
How can I say no to such a great photo and such a polite request?
i will always support this post
@mooserattler back on my dash!
Why isnât this at a million notes, yet, Dante???
Iâm not sure. Hey lovely people who have taken me over half way to a cool million! If youâd like to reblog again, Iâd love that, if not, I still love you, and hope youâre having a great day. Iâm gonna go do some stand up tonight.
did I ever mention that I know someone whose family owned a zombie dog because thatâs some real shit that I get to delight with at parties
Tell us that story?
okay here is the story of the zombie dog
this dogâs name was John. they found him half drowned in a bag of puppies that were not so fortunate as he was, and was taken in immediately. he was a runt and not quite right (most likely from the whole half drowned thing), but a very loving dog. the problem with John was that he smelled like death, and no one knew why. vets couldnât figure it out. it was obviously some kind of skin problem, but they had no idea what kind. all anyone knew was that if you touched him, you would smell like death too, so you couldnât pet him, and that for some reason, the only thing that made the smell go away was being around other dogs. so they got another dog and the death smell stopped and John lived a very happy life
when he was getting old, maybe about 15 years, part of his skull caved in. just like that! suddenly had a huge dent in his head! and he was totally fine. didnât notice it, didnât affect him at all. just this massive dent right there in his head where his skull had collapsed in on his brain, and he was still the happiest and most loving dog. the skull cave in, for whatever reason, caused the ear on that side of his head to just fall off entirely, but again, perfectly happy dog who did not know he was down an ear and a fully formed skull. they took him to the vet, thinking maybe they should put him down. I mean, wouldnât you think so? but the vet said that the dog was eating, and pooping, and happy, so there was no reason to put him down, so they didnât
but thatâs not even the weird part. the weird part is the area of the brain that got caved in on was apparently the area that registers pain, so this one-eared, collapsed skull dog could no longer feel any pain. he got old, his joints got stiff, his teeth rotted out of his head, his tongue hung out of his mouth and got black and hard, and he felt none of it! in fact, he was happier than heâd ever been feeling no pain, and the fact that he didnât feel how much he was falling apart somehow made him live until he was 23. thatâs right, the collapsed skull, one eared, zero teeth, smells like literal death when alone dog lived to be 23 years old. they used to joke that heâd been dead for years, but was too stupid to realize it yet
and thatâs the story about the literal zombie dog my friendâs family owned
I want to be the house that my childrenâs friends want to come to, because despite whatever theyâre facing at home, theyâll know theyâll find a second family with me and mine.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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who is that lol
PEOPLE STILL LISTEN TO OWL CITY HAAAAAAAHA
someone obviously doesnât get 1,000 hugs from 10,000 lightning bugs lmao
I want to kiss you in a way that makes you not want to kiss anyone else ever again
Handgun door knobsâŚ. pull the trigger to open it.
wait for itâŚ

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Ohh my god
Womanâs voice:Â âBring your tail over here! Bring it over here! Bring it over here!â [many people laughing]
@captioned-vines
I hate everything about this
I FUCKING LOVE THIS
Shark: Hey, thatâs Phil- HONEY! PHILâS ON TV!!
Marry someone who lets you have a bite of their brownie, even when you said you werenât hungry. Marry someone who laughs at the same things you do. Marry someone who kisses your nose on a cold day. Marry someone who you can watch Disney movies with. Marry someone who is proud of you whether you earn ÂŁ5 a week or ÂŁ5,000 a week. Marry someone who you can tell everything to. Marry someone who isnât afraid or embarrassed to hold your hand in public. Marry someone who lets you take over when decorating a cake. Marry someone who you can spend the day in Ikea with without feeling stressed. Marry someone who wraps you up inside their coat in the winter. Marry someone who accepts your fears and phobias. Marry someone who gives you butterflies every time you hear their key in the door. Marry someone who you donât always have to shave your legs for. Marry someone who accepts you all day every day, even when you donât look or feel your best. Marry someone who puts three sugars in your tea, despite telling them âjust the twoâ. Marry someone who doesnât judge you when you eat your body weight in cookies. Marry someone who doesnât make you want to check your phone, because you know they will reply. Marry someone who waits with you to get on the train. Marry someone who understands that you need to be alone sometimes. Marry someone who gets on well with your parents and isnât uptight about family events. Marry someone who calms you down when you get mad about stupid stuff, and never tells you itâs âonly stupid stuffâ. Marry someone who makes you want to be a better person. Marry someone who makes you laugh. Marry someone who you love. Marry your soulmate, your lover, your best friend.
(via bl-ossomed)
Good Vibes HERE
(via thelovenotebook)
 (via thelovenotebook)
 (via thelovenotebook)
this is the money dog, repost in the next 24 hours and money will come your way!!

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
When your boyfriend or girlfriend asks if you are okay..
Donât lie to them. If y'all are in love, tell them whatâs bothering you. They care. Itâs okay to be vulnerable with them. Donât tell them âyes, Iâm okayâ and youâre not, because then youâll be mad at them for not understanding youâre hurt when YOU HAVENâT EVEN EXPLAINED IT to them. People canât read minds. Give them the chance to listen, give them the chance to understand. Let them love you, communication is key.