Umm...

Aries-

Confident

High sex drive

Secretly a sweetheart

Taurus-

Best person to adventure with

Pro memer

Best hair

Gemini-

Natural pro at everything

Straight up gorgeous

Cancer-

Best laugh

Biggest sweetheart

Mother hen to all

Leo-

Bad ass bitch

Evil genius

Strong af

Virgo-

Genuine and caring

Nicest mofo 

Always good for a laugh

Libra-

Always ready to fuckin party

Doesn’t give af

Low key cry baby

Scorpio-

An onion of a person (30 layers of personalities)

Nicest/meanest person you’ve ever met

Don’t take shit

Sagittarius-

Funny af

Actual perfection

Knows everything about everything always

Capricorn-

Hot af

Hard worker

Wicked smart

Aquarius-

Prettiest people to walk the planet

Goofy as hell

Precious smiles

Pisces-

The best friend you could ever ask for

Style ~icon~

Storytime! Halloween a few years back my mates and I were dressed up for Halloween and my cat furry roommate (good guy, furries are entertaining folks) was wearing his partial suit out with us. We were in Boston proper and all of us were on a budget at the time, so the only option for a late night drink and dinner open to us was a place called Dick’s Last Resort.  If you’ve never been, the big draw at Dick’s is that they’re dicks to you.  The staff are sarcastic, they throw your menus and straws and shit at you, and they make you hats that say mean stuff. 

I don’t get it either. So anyways, we’ve got - I’ll call him Frank - the cat with us, and Frank’s 100% ready to go fuck with Dicks, so we head on in. The waitress starts doing her bit, but the cat in the room has thrown off her game and she doesn’t really know how to handle Frank in Full Cat mode. 

He points out the drink he wants without speaking, with a paw, on the menu and she asks for an ID and starts saying ‘I swear to god your ID better have a big fuckkin’ cat on it or-“