Daily Office

"You looking for dinner and a movie?'Cause you're not gonna find it in that box."

Assistant to the Regional Manager

I don't have a lot experience with vampires, but I have hunted werewolves. I shot one once. But by the time I got to it, it had turned back into my neighbor's dog.

The chimney's in decent shape. Not great. I found some termite damage in a crawl space, and some structual flaws in the foundation, so, all-in-all, it was a pretty fun cocktail party.

Actually, it's polite to arrive early, and smart. Only really good friends show up early. Ergo de facto, show up early, become a really good friend.

Whenever I'm about to do something, I think, 'would an idiot do that?' And if they would, I do not do that thing.

A boss is like a teacher. And I am like the cool teacher, like Mr. Handell. Mr. Handell would hang out with us and he would tell us awesome jokes and he actually hooked up with one of the students. And then like 12 other kids came forward.. it was in all the papers. Really ruined eighth grade for us.

I saw Wedding Crashers, accidentally. I bought a ticket for Grizzly Man and went into the wrong theatre. After an hour I figured I was in the wrong theatre but I kept waiting. That's the thing about bear attacks, they come when you least expect it.

Campus. Brings back so many memories, that I would have made.

Allegiance

Good ol Creed

Housing Questions

If someone gives you ten thousand to one on anything, you take it. If John Mellencamp ever wins an oscar, I'm going to be a very rich dude.