Vaxilmore Boundary Crossing
It’s one of my most dear parts of their dynamic…
Vax sets a clear cut off with Gilmore. ‘I like you, but not like that. I’m not in love with you, and nothing is ever going to happen between us. I’m pursuing someone else, and we can’t keep flirting because it’s not fair to you.’
Of course it’s more flowery, but that’s the line he sets. And Gilmore of course (the pure of heart that he is) is like ‘that’s a tad dissapointing but I’d rather die than upset you, so it is what it is. So be it. Flirting stops.’
AND THEN?? The two of them have genuinely 0 clue how to interact with each other without crossing that line.
Every interaction afterward is weird, and stunted. Gilmore avoids Vax for a little, tries to step back, tries to be normal about him, but inevitably continues to fall into him. Because he loves him so terribly, even if it’s cruel to his own broken heart, he’s always there for Vax
Vax literally kisses Gil right after telling him he’s never going to be with him. He continuously goes to Gil to tell him his problems, and confide in him, and be comforted by him.
When the Rakshasa disguises as Gil and asks Vax to change into a night robe (and out of his armor) and take a walk with him, VAX IMMEDIATELY DOES. WITH ZERO QUESTION. If it had been ANY member of VM, I guarantee you that wouldn’t have worked.
Vax hugs Gilmore after he discovers his wings, and Gilmore hesitates to hug back. Unsure if even hugging vax is allowed. And in that scene, Gilmore weeps. For all his hiding about the break off hurting his feelings, him hugging Vax makes him cry.
Vax tells Gilmore he loves him. On MULTIPLE occasions. And of course he does, but again. Not like that. And notably, Gilmore never says it back. Even though he does, very much so, and definitely like that. But the fact is it’s cruel to Gilmore to say it back, knowing Vax doesn’t mean it like he does.
Vax even goes to see Gilmore in his new home, sits with him, and brings up the breakup AGAIN. He apologizes and again confides in him. Again, and again, Gilmore comforts him while constantly brushing aside his own heartbreak.
He says: “Go, kill a dragon. Kill two, three, six, I don’t care. But you have to come back, because your friends need to keep pimping out my name.”
Which of course serves two purposes:
1: to truly mean “go be reckless, as is your nature. But please come back alive. I don’t know what I’ll do without you.” Without breaking vax’s no flirting boundary
2: to make Vax smile, when he had come to Gilmore so upset he was about to be sick.
THEN vax tells Gilmore. “Whoever gets you will be a very lucky man.”
“I love you.” but not in that way.
“I know.” It hurts me, but I’ll take what I can get.
Gilmore and Vax dance around the sheer fact that they don’t know how to just be friends.
Vax sits Gilmore down to tell him, no more romance, only to continue to keep him close, and confide in him more than anyone else. Because he knows Shaun’s love is unconditional, because he knows he will leave feeling happier, and lighter.
And Gilmore takes it all because any shred of Vax he can get, he will take. Because he’s selfless, because he’s greedy, because he loves him very much like that.
