Eating Disorder Confessions
-Sometimes I eat so much it hurts. The physical pain is so unbearable that I have to force myself to vomit to get rid of the pain.
-I don't actually like fainting and feeling dizzy, but it's a reminder that what I'm doing is working.
-I feel like ice has calories.
-I've tried eating things like plastic, paper, and cotton balls just to be able to eat something and not consume food. I felt bad for failing to continue this technique.
-I used to hide food in my dressers when eating alone in my room, so no one could see that I wasn't eating.
-I've flushed food down the toilet to dispose of it or sometimes to just get it away from me so I wasn't tempted to eat it.
-I have a not-pro pro-ana blog no one knows about that I still go to sometimes to trigger my ED.
-I've only been professionally diagnosed with BED and mia, even though sometimes I go days, or a couple weeks, without eating anything.
-My entire life, I only had doctors tell me I needed to lose weight, dismissing any other potential causes for anything.
-When I see myself in the mirror, I cry every time. And I don't know whether I really look that way, or if I have body dysmorphia.
-When I tell myself I might have body dismorphia, I counter it with the quote, "The scale doesn't lie".
-I have an ana scrapbook still from when I was younger.
-Nuggies are my safe food, despite me not caring much for the taste of chicken.
-I compare my body to everyone and everything.
-I love having an ED if it isn't BED.
-I want to be so fragile and small and have people I love take care of me.
-Things like pills and toothpaste have calories in my mind.
-Seeing that vitamin gummies have 10 calories each made me want to not take them.
-I started counting calories in other drinks because now I'm too scared I'll have too many calories from them, even though I eat little to nothing most days.
-Gum is okay. (But it has to be sugarfree.)
-After losing a lot of weight, it actually hurts to sit on my ass.
