iām staying in tonight. i wonāt stop you from leaving.
i know that iām not what you wanted, am i?
itās not worth the effort to lie.
you donāt have to remind me so much how i disappoint you.
i think if i ruin this that i know i can live with it.
maybe the emptiness is just a lesson in canvases.
maybe itās all gonna turn out alright. i know that itās not, but i have to believe that it is.
i canāt tell the difference when iām all alone.
is it real or a dream? which is worse?
when i turn out the lights, thereās no one left between myself and me.
i know you donāt understand, because you donāt believe what you canāt see.
when you watch me throwing punches at the devil, it just looks like iām fighting with me.
thereās a comfort in failure.
i know you were trying to help but youāre only making it worse.
you canāt even imagine how badly it hurts.
even you couldnāt manage to pull the fuse from the back of my head.
when you tell me you loved me, i wanted so bad to believe it.
tell me you love me. tell me you loved me.
nobodyās worried about me.
i shouldnāt have built a house in the middle of your chest.
youāre everything i want and iām all you dread.
the harder i swim, the faster i sink.
my heart is gonna eat itself.
itās just me, the vacant and nobody else.
i know whatās in my cannibal chest.
do i turn into light if i burn alive?
whatās it like to be empty, full of only echoes?
i could have sworn the sirens were the holy ghost just speaking in morse code.
if i scream a little louder i know you would have heard it.
if i could do what i want, i would become an electrician. iād climb inside my ears and rearrange the wires in my brain.
a different me would be inhabiting this body.
i was just wondering if thereās any way that you made a mistake.
if it makes me feel better, how bad could it be?
iām not fooled when you tell me youāre glad i came.
am i honest or just a hypocrite?
there is nowhere i can hide from your humiliating grace.
i didnāt see the point in trying to save myself.
damn it, we are gonna figure something out if it takes me all night.
as long as youāre not tired yet of talking, it helps to make it hurt less.
when is it too many times to tell you that i think of you every night?
i could be cruel. i could make you hate me.
itās not that i think iām good. i know that iām evil.
i swear to god, i think iām gonna die.
iām conducting an experiment on how it feels to die.
try to stay calm, because nobody knows the violent partner you carry around.
i take it all back. i changed my mind.