Free Spirit

when he asks for nudes but you’re not in the mood

Everyone’s pain is different… I don’t like when people compare. I don’t like when people marginalize their feelings because they think they’re not allowed to have them. Someone will always have a tougher go than you. Does that mean you’re not allowed to feel hurt? To be sad?

What if? What if I never get over you? What if I woke up and your voice already echoes in my head even before I open my eyes? What if I can see you in every thing, and every place I go? What if that time I was waiting for isn’t certain?–the time that I’ll finally get over you? I see you in my past and my future, and it aches my heart that I couldn’t have you in my present. What if I was the one who broke my heart and not you? I became so damaged because of the fabricated image of me and you that I have weaved in my mind for so long? What if we weren’t really made for each other from the start? What if you were made for someone else and I am made for myself? With just a glimpse of an eye, I witnessed how you turned into a “what if” when all along I thought you are already my “what is”. Was I wrong at that too? For thinking that you have given me the reassurance and certainty I always thought that was here?

I shouldn’t be jealous. You aren’t even mine.

a reminder that just because you can still see your scars doesn’t mean they haven’t been healing