HighTea with Swiftie

I do recall my shallow feelings .

I can no longer draw the shape of your face

In blue skies,

Oh what a disgrace,

To remember your pitiful eyes.

there is, but one thing

A recollection my mind brings

Of your words with its sentiments.

Your words,

Yours to hold but mine to keep.

Somewhere at the back of mind,

Your voice echoe the same plea

Again & again.

While I spend my vulnerability

Trying to make sense of it

Again

And

Like, is anybody here ? Am I talking to myself? Yeah I liked that post… but when did you post it? Yesterday? 5 mins ago? 7 years ago?

THIS.

This is me in my zen,

I feel as free as a wren.

With the wind blowing my hair,

I sway my arms without a care,

Wearing my favourite white

And a red lipstick all the while,

Listening to Taylor Swift

Surely, life is a gift.

In the midst of these wondrous creation

I’m filled with grace of much gration.

Yes, I feel my hair dance to the air

But most of all,

the child in question :

Taylor : GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER !

Other times I want to live in an old Victorian house with the love of my life and our 3 kids .

He sees me.

He is a God who sees.

But I also love how much I relate to it T_T

( long story short it was the wrong guy,

Long story short I survived (;

I don’t know what triggered it-

Finding an old Taylor Swift album and remembering what I had felt like the first time I listened to each song,

Or finding old dusty diaries filled with entries of someone I once cared for

Or the visits from that person in my dreams recently.

I don’t know.

I’ve prayed to God for His healing upon our friendship. And so, I’ve stopped grieving.

I am no longer sad over it. And my mind is no longer mad.

What’s meant to be, will be. I find comfort knowing this is all in God’s will.

Some may say I’m stupid, dumb, naive, idk~ and they may just be right .

But he calms the storm in my heart.

He wraps me in his arms and I feel secure.

He calls me beautiful and I answer back like it’s my name.