The only reason I work now is for buying alcohol. No other valid reason than that.
I mean yeah I can create one thousand and one reasons on why I work, but then again they are not as valid as that.
Makes me wonder where this life will take me next. Will I become alcoholic later? I sure as hell am already giving it up. I don’t think I will pass an opportunity to die.
And when it finally kicks in, the pressure, I will just stare at the blank wall again, laying on my bed all day and night, sleeping, crying, back to sleeping, and it makes me feel worse cause you know, families, and peoples start hounding on you, calling you lazy and what not, forcing you to stand and do things.
I suppose, things never really matter.
Hey past me, I'm glad to tell you that we did not become an alcoholic. While we do still drink during social settings that required it, we no longer need it to help us sleep.
Also, we are getting healthier! I got a gym membership (still trying to get consistent), I also picked up the things we used to love. Now, I make time to go karaoke and sing. Bought a drawing tablet and start drawing again. And pay for workshop classes to learn new things!
It's okay, we're here now
