Aesthetic™️

So sorry, but we don’t have many resources or advice on creating a headspace with aphantasia. We like to recommend the blog @aphantasicheadspace for folks with aphantasia who are looking for headspace-building tips, guides, and experiences.

As far as communication goes, though, it may be useful for y’all to attempt external communication as much as possible. We’ve touched on this in our post on establishing contact with headmates (<- hyperlink). For our system at least, we had to communicate externally a lot in order to help build and bolster internal communication. We still have parts who communicate externally, because that’s their only way of being heard and acknowledged as we’re still seriously struggling with dissociative barriers.

Even though you haven’t been able to successfully communicate internally, it may be good to just keep trying every once in a while. Definitely don’t stress or overwhelm yourself/ves, but if you have the energy for it, reaching out to your alters occasionally could be really beneficial for your system. You’re still attempting to make those connections and practicing a new skill, even if you don’t hear back from anyone else! And just because you don’t hear or feel other alters doesn’t necessarily mean that they can’t hear/feel you. So sending positive vibes or emotions their way (it doesn’t have to be images or complete thoughts!) could really help communication improve overall.

Do you have any advice on unmasking, especially for systems that tend to fall back on heavy masking at the drop of a pin whenever things get too stressful?

We've known about being a system for nearly 3 years now, and despite it and many other symptoms/experiences that make it obvious we are, I (host) still have so much doubt and imposter syndrome about it because of just how heavily we mask.

We've never been able to get beyond just seeing an outline of things in-headspace due to poor visualization (I'm not sure if it's due to a form of aphantasia or something else), and whenever things are hard we can barely hear or feel each other. It makes it so difficult to know which is real or fake, and the more doubt I see from those I'm close to that used to identify as systems, the more terrified I am of faking it myself.

We can't even remember to talk to each other in Simply Plural or in our system server because our mind completely blocks out all of the reminders we set up.

Please please help if you can, this is genuinely getting very difficult and painful, and I'm not sure what to do. I've hardly found any posts or advice for unmasking. (Please give traumagenic-centered advice!)

Hello. A few parts started working together on a response to your ask, and it kept getting longer and longer, so we eventually made this post on unmasking instead:

Additionally, we will share this post on dealing with denial, as it sounds like denial, imposter syndrome, and fear of faking have been making life in your system challenging:

Ah, and we may encourage your system to try and avoid being harsh with yourselves for forgetting, struggling to communicate, or reverting back to masking. Rather, you may benefit from focusing on communicating and building relationships whenever you do remember. Positive reinforcement often yields better results than punishment, especially over something so morally neutral as forgetting. If you have a dissociative disorder, there very well could be barriers in place that are preventing you from achieving the results you desire.

hey, we have a couple posts that might work for y’all. first is this post for systems with aphantasia

and this post for systems with little to no inner world/headspace

Hey, we already have a post for systems with aphantasia:

do you think we could get some advice on how to boost connection to the headspace and/or communication? we're a proxy sys but we're very like. strung-out, i guess. no worries if not, of course

Hey, so we’ll do our best to answer both of these questions and talk about boosting connection to your system’s headspace, and boosting communication between system members.

When it comes to connecting with your headspace, we’d like to share a couple links that might help -

Our general post on headspaces, what they are, and how to build/maintain one (with some links to further reading):

And this post by @/humanheartharmonia with some advice from their own experience regarding headspaces:

We think this post ^ has some really handy and useful tips to help headmates connect with their headspace and visualize themselves within their headspace a bit better.

And as for boosting communication between system members… our best advice boils down to time, patience, practice, and self care.

Time: Most systems aren’t going to have amazing communication after just a few weeks of getting to know each other. We believe that for almost any system communication can improve, but it’s going to take time to get there. It could take anywhere from a few months to a few decades to get to a point where you can communicate with your headmates in the ways that you want to. So patience is key here.

Patience: Know that you might not be able to communicate perfectly with your headmates at first, and that’s okay. Don’t punish yourself or your system or talk down on anyone if y’all are getting frustrated, if it’s been a while since you’ve heard from each other, or if you’re feeling exhausted from spending too much time focusing on communication. Take breaks. Take deep breaths. Take things one day at a time. You’ll get there one day - don’t give up!

Practice: Try talking and listening to your headmates whenever you have the energy and cognitive bandwidth for it. Think about them, ask them how they’re doing, and just try to chat with them whenever you can. If things are hazy, foggy, or unclear, that’s okay. If you’re able to, we encourage you to just keep trying even when it’s difficult. Not every interaction between headmates will be distinct and crystal clear. Sometimes things get muddled or different headmates seem distant, and that’s okay. But the more your practice today, the easier it will be tomorrow. Practicing communication every day can help y’all build a solid foundation so that, say, one or two years from now, y’all may find that you’re in a much better place and communication comes much more naturally.

Self care: In our own system, communication becomes much more difficult when we are struggling to meet our own physical, mental, and emotional needs. So doing our best to look after our mind and body can really make a huge difference in the quality of our communication. We’ll go ahead and link our self care post here, in case y’all may find yourselves in a similar situation.

This is probably as much as I’m going to be able to say here for now. We could go on and on about internal communication, how to build on it, potential speed bumps or risks, and how it may look differently for different systems. Please don’t be too discouraged if y’all are still struggling with communication after a few weeks of daily practice - remember that communication is a skill just like any other, and it will take time to master.

hey, not sure if we’re misreading your request, but we have a couple posts which might cheer your system.

this one for systems with similar headmates:

and this one for headmates with different dialects and accents (including positivity for those who wish they had this or who only experience it in headspace)

According to Pluralpedia, proxy systems are “where one functions as a singlet (or approximately close to one, such as a median system) due to a frontstuck host, yet all members of the system are completely distinct in the headspace.” Many systems may find that they function in this way! This post is for all the proxy systems out there!

🧡 Shoutout to willogenic, paromancy, imagian, or other willfully created proxy systems!

💛 Shoutout to systems who are writers, artists, or other creators whose headmates are characters who are unable to switch or front!

🤍 Shoutout to proxy systems with headmates who wish they could switch!

💜 Shoutout to proxy systems whose members often cofront, blur or blend together, or are coconscious!

💙 Shoutout to proxy systems who love, embrace, and celebrate the way their system works!

🧡 Shoutout to protogenic proxy systems, or those who have always been plural even if no one but the host has fronted!

💛 Shoutout to proxy systems who identify as specutien or have some other specific labels for their experience as proxy systems!

🤍 Shoutout to proxy systems with vast, complex headspaces, and to proxy systems with no headspace whatsoever!

💜 Shoutout to those who are questioning whether or not they are a proxy system!

💙 Shoutout to hosts of proxy systems who work hard to help their headmates live the lives they want to live, even if they can’t fully front!

🧡 Shoutout to proxy systems who prefer to present as a singlet in their daily life for their own comfort and/or safety!

Proxy systems have always been and will always be valued, cherished, and integral members of the plural community! To any proxy system who reads this, please know that your system is real and you are valid, regardless of how you experience plurality or the ways in which your system functions! It’s okay if most of your system members interact with the world through your system’s host. That doesn’t negate the validity of your system in any way, shape, or form!

We hope that every proxy system out there can have an amazing day today. Know that you are so loved, and you make the world and our spaces a better place simply by existing in it! Regardless of how your system came to be, you are special, your system is beautiful, and we are so pleased to be able to share this wonderful, diverse community with you. Please keep you chin up, have some pride in your system and how it works, and do you best to take care of each other!

Magic is a broad concept that covers a wide range of metaphysical or supernatural actions or events. Many systems may find that they have headmates who are able to use or wield magic within their system’s headspaces or inner worlds! This post is for those headmates!

✨ Shoutout to headmates whose magic is unpredictable or difficult to manage or control!

💠 Shoutout to headmates whose magic is tied to their own spirituality in some way!

🔮 Shoutout to headmates who regularly practice or study magic within their system’s headspace!

✨ Shoutout to headmates who are confused by or are struggling to understand their magic!

💠 Shoutout to headmates whose magic in-headspace can often or occasionally have real-life consequences!

🔮 Shoutout to headmates who are witches or are otherwise practitioners of witchcraft whose magic is a result of their craft!

✨ Shoutout to headmates with elemental magic, dark magic, or magic that is somehow connected to some other force beyond themselves!

💠 Shoutout to introjects who practice magic due to actions taken by or the identities of their sources!

🔮 Shoutout to headmates whose magic is tied to their role or place in their system in some way!

✨ Shoutout to headmates who use their magic to help, energize, or cheer up their fellow system members!

There is nothing wrong with having abilities in your headspace that your body is incapable of, and this absolutely extends to those who have, use, or practice magic in their system’s headspace! We hope that every headmate who uses magic in their headspace can have a wonderful day today. Whether you spend your time honing your skills, experimenting, studying, or using your magic in other ways, we hope that your magical abilities can being joy and happiness to yourself and your system!

According to Pluralpedia, misaconscious refers to a system who is partly monoconscious and partly polyconscious in some way. Split misaconscious systems are those whose misaconsciousness is separated between the front and headspace. These folks absolutely deserve to be recognized and uplifted in our spaces. So here’s to all the split misaconscious systems out there!

💜 Shoutout to systems with members who can’t remember headspace events whenever they’re fronting!

🎶 Shoutout to systems who cannot get in touch with each other when one member is fronting and another is in their headspace!

👾 Shoutout to systems who have very little understanding of their own consciousness and how it works!

🌑 Shoutout to systems whose connections to other members vary based on whether they feel monoconscious or polyconscious at the time!

💜 Shoutout to those whose in-system relationships vary depending on whether they are fronting or in their headspace!

🎶 Shoutout to split misaconscious systems whose communication is choppy, confusing, or unreliable!

👾 Shoutout to systems who are questioning whether or not they are split misaconscious!

🌑 Shoutout to headmates in split misaconscious systems who work hard to keep the rest of their headmates informed about outside or inner world events!

Understanding consciousness can be tricky, confusing, and complicated, and this can be especially true for those who experience multiplicity! It’s okay to have headmates who experience consciousness in different ways, or for your system members to experience consciousness differently when they’re fronting or in your system’s headspace. There is no wrong way to exist or perceive the world and your own mind!

To every split misaconscious system out there, we want to let you know that you belong in the plural community just the way you are. We truly value and cherish your unique perspectives, and we hope that your future is filled with peace, happiness, understanding, and self-acceptance!

Being so small it's easy to feel a lot of imposter syndrome when some of the systems I know break 100 systemmates. And when they talk about these highly complex innerworlds that they can access when mine is just like an apartment complex.

Hey, having a small system is not too weird and not at all an indication that you’re not actually plural. Our partner system also has just 4 members. There’s lots of small systems out there, and there’s nothing wrong with being a small system. We’ve actually written a positivity post for small systems in the past:

It’s also normal for systems to not have an inner world, have a basic or rudimentary inner world, or have headmates who aren’t able to access their inner world at all. There’s no one right way to be a system, and having an inner world or headspace isn’t a requirement for plurality at all.

Hiya! Wondering if you could do a post about systems with walk-in headmates? I've seen it refered to as gateway systems before but idk how accurate and/or common that term is.

My entire system consists of people who just arrived one day, with no apparent reason or cause, and we get a lot of 'visitors' where a headmate will arrive and stay for only a week or two, and then leave again, and it feels very natural to us but no one seems to talk abt it much? Anyways if you don't know anything/can't find anything abt it that's totally cool, just figured I'd ask:)

Thanks for your time and energy^-^

- the Attic

Hi! To us it does indeed sound like y’all could be a gateway system. We’ll link the pluralpedia entry below so you can learn a little more!

Note that pluralpedia only mentions gateways as being connected to other worlds, but from what we understand, the gateway can connect a system to other universes as well, along with places like their own psyche, headspace, or subconscious mind! Many gateway systems believe in a multiverse theory, but that is not necessary in order to be or identify as a gateway system.

We’ve written a positivity post for gateway systems in the past! Here it is:

And we also wrote a new post just for walk-ins! It’s in the queue and should be up on our blog tonight at 8:00PM EST.

im a host of a recent system of 20-ish and guh i am t i r e d

im mainly looking for advice on how to switch or just retreat into the headspace/leave front or even just kinda stop being fully aware while still being in front for awhile bc id rlly like to take a break and the realization that im most likely front attracted/frontstuck is kinda making me more tired of being in front

also if it helps at all my(&) system is parogenic + traumagenic in origin (specifically parotraumagenic) and theres kinda iffy communication between members (some of them i have clear communication with and they randomly pop up to say stuff, some i have no idea where they are and some of them i can usually only hear when im directly interacting with them).

afaik (as far as i know) only three?? ppl have rlly "fronted" per se, and the rest have been co-con

i apologize for the long and mildly depressing ask but any help is appreciated also dont forget to hydrate

Hello! We have some posts that might help you that we’d like to share if that’s okay. The first is a post we wrote a while back with some tips on switching from our own experience:

We’d also like to share this post by @rin-and-jade on being frontstuck or frontlocked, and how to go about unsticking yourself!

Our own system host (Parker) is almost always fronting to some extent. It can certainly be exhausting and disheartening fronting nonstop, especially when other members of your system can seemingly come and go as they please. He’s going to put some info under a cut for how he copes with fronting constantly, in case you want some advice on coping with being genuinely unable to switch out!

We hope something here will be helpful for you! We’re wishing you the best of luck with switching out or at least learning how best to cope with fronting in your future!

Hey! We’re sorry that you’re going through such a hard time right now when it comes to switching and having some self-doubts. We might have some advice that could help you, though!

As far as headspaces go, if your system hasn’t actively worked on creating a headspace, you may just not have one, at least not yet! Most systems do not start out with a headspace and have to actively work on creating one. You can check out our post on headspaces for more info!

It’s true though that some systems may have members who can’t access their headspace (we have someone in our system who’s like this!). So not being able to access your headspace doesn’t mean you don’t have one, and it doesn’t mean you’re not a system! That’s just the way it is for some folks, unfortunately.

When it comes to actually pulling off a switch, it makes sense to worry about losing control or the ability to front again. If it’s any consolation, though, we can assure you that the chances of permanently losing control or going dormant after switching out are quite slim. As long as you are needed in your system, you’re not likely to go dormant! And even dormant headmates often don’t leave forever. Dormancy doesn’t mean death and isn’t something to stress or fret about! For many headmates, dormancy is just a fact of life.

Finally, we so have a post with some switching tips and info that might be useful for y’all! We’ll go ahead and link it here. Hopefully something in it could be useful or helpful for your system!

If y’all are never able to switch successfully, that doesn’t mean you’re delusional or faking your plurality in any way! We cannot stress this fact enough. Some systems never ever switch, and that does not invalidate their plurality one bit! As long as you feel plural and are comfortable identifying as such, then you are plural, and your system is absolutely welcome here and you belong in plural spaces. Please don’t try to hold yourself or your system to unrealistic standards! Switching is not a requirement for plurality, and even if you’re never able to switch successfully, that doesn’t mean you’re not a real system.

Hey - we’re not sure if there’s a specific term for what you’re experiencing. To us, it just sounds like being a system in the early stages of discovery.

It’s pretty normal for system members to not have a ton of awareness about other system members, especially not at first. It’s also very common for system members to not be able to control each other. Even a system’s host may struggle with keeping their system on the same page or not even be aware of how many members their system has. Our system was in a similar position when we first started learning about each other.

Having multiple members front at the same time is another common occurrence. As we understand it, when two or more members are fronting together with shared access to the world and control over their body, that is co-fronting. If one member is fronting fully while another member is able to be present and witness events without being an active participant, that is being co-conscious. Our system experiences a mixture of both!

As far as an inner world… most systems don’t come with one right off the bat. For many systems, inner worlds or headspaces are visualization tools that were actively imagined and built by the systems themselves. We wrote a post about headspaces in the past which might help you learn more:

And as for your fellow headmates appearing as copies… some systems do just function that way. We’ve known systems to have twin members, clone members, carbon-copy members, or to fully exist as a system made up of multiple versions of one person. This might change in the future, as you all grow and learn more about yourselves and each other… or it might not. For some folks, that’s how their plurality manifests, and that’s okay! It’s nothing to worry about actively changing, unless it’s been causing you and your members a lot of distress.

Headspaces and inner worlds can look and function incredibly different from system to system. Some systems may find that roleplaying or writing out events that have happened in their headspace can help them process, solidify, and better understand the things that have occurred. So this post goes out to those who write out and/or roleplay headspace events!

✏️ Shoutout to systems who process exotrauma or inside traumatic experiences through writing and roleplay!

📖 Shoutout to systems with inner worlds that are majorly influenced by their own fictional works, or who have fictional works based on their own headspaces!

✏️ Shoutout to systems in roleplay groups who roleplay as themselves or as members of their own system!

📖 Shoutout to systems who use writing and roleplay as tools to help them visualize inner world events!

✏️ Shoutout to systems who have been writing and roleplaying collaboratively before they ever knew about their plurality!

📖 Shoutout to headmates who are introjects from their system’s roleplay/writing, who feel comfortable roleplaying or writing their system’s headspace events!

✏️ Shoutout to systems who are trying to get into writing or roleplay for the purpose of helping them process events from their headspace!

Writing or roleplaying events that have happened in your system’s headspace does not mean that you’re not a real system or are faking your plurality in any way! It’s okay to use whatever tools you like in order to help visualize your headspace or process headspace events.

Know that you will always belong in the plural community as you are. Your creativity and artistic vision for your system’s headspace is a benefit both to your own system and the plural community as a whole! We hope you can continue to develop your headspace in ways that feel healthy and comfortable for you. Thanks so much for reading, and take care!

Hello! We’ve often said here that for our system, switching is involuntary and happens automatically or with the help of our gatekeeper. However, we often get asked here about switching, how it works, how to practice switching, and how to switch for the very first time. In general, we’re probably unequipped to confidently answer these questions. But we’ve decided to put together this post with information we’ve picked up from therapy, research, and learning from other systems. We hope this can help you and your system learn to switch more effortlessly!

Disclaimer: We are not an expert or clinician by any stretch of the word! We are one DID system sharing our experience and information we’ve picked up during our time in treatment and system spaces. This post comes from the perspective of a system with DID, though much of this advice could be potentially useful for all sorts of systems!

What is switching?

Switching is a common occurrence in systems when one headmate swaps places with another in order to perceive and interact with the world. Systems of all sorts can switch, not just those with dissociative disorders like DID or OSDD! Switching can look incredibly different from system to system, and may vary based on a wide variety of factors such as:

System origin

Previous history with switching

Degree of dissociative barriers

Comfort levels with fronting and switching for each headmate

The presence of a system manager or gatekeeper

Safety of the system overall

And more!

Do all systems switch?

No, not every system wants to switch or is capable of switching! Many systems exist with one primary fronter and many headmates who either cofront, are coconscious, or never front to experience the outside world at all. Switching is not a requirement to be a system, and it’s not even a requirement to have a dissociative disorder.

Many systems may find that headmates have switched before without noticing it! Before a system’s “syscovery,” headmates may lose time, experience identity shifts, or interact with other system members without ever realizing that they’re plural. In fact, an overwhelming majority of systems with disorders like DID and OSDD are covert, meaning their switches and other symptoms often go unnoticed by other people or the systems themselves!

How can I switch with my headmates?

We don’t have any surefire way to guarantee switching, as every system is unique and no two systems function in exactly the same way! However, here are some ideas for you and your headmates to try in order to help a switch occur.

1. Open communication

Communicate with as many headmates as you can on a regular basis. Keep an open dialogue, and talk to your headmates about fronting, what that might look like for them, and any worries they have about potentially fronting in the future. Try to address each headmate’s fears and concerns to the best of your ability before expecting them to front. Imagine together what it might look like for other headmates to front. Try to understand what happens to headmates in your system who aren’t fronting: do they enter your system’s headspace/inner world? Do they stop fully existing or enter a sort of stasis? Are they still able to perceive the outside world at all? Having a stable, steady line of communication and an understanding of how your system works can help make it easier to allow other headmates to front when the time comes!

2. Seek out a gatekeeper or system manager

Many, but not all, systems have members whose role is specifically to manage who fronts and control switches. Our own system has a gatekeeper who handles the majority of our switches! If you haven’t already, try to learn whether or not your system already has an established gatekeeper. If you do, establishing a connection with that headmate and communicating with them will be essential for switching in the future.

If your system doesn’t have a gatekeeper/manager, that’s fine! A headmate with this role is not required for system to experience switches. For those who do have them, however, cooperating with managers and gatekeepers can help make switching a smoother, more painless process!

3. Ensure safety

Don’t attempt to switch if your system is not 100% safe, and only try to switch after all headmates involved feel comfortable and secure. NEVER try to force a headmate to switch who doesn’t want to. Respect each other’s boundaries and rights to personal autonomy.

When you’re ready to try and purposefully switch, do so in a safe, comfortable, secluded environment. Try to limit distractions and opportunities for interruptions. Check in with headmates that you have access to, and ensure that everyone feels safe and comfortable before attempting to switch.

For minors, traumagenic systems, and those who currently live with abusers or those who have harmed them: it may be for the best to not attempt to switch until you’re in a situation where you are distanced from those who have caused you harm (be them parents, friends, loved ones, or anyone else). Unfortunately for many systems, this may mean waiting until you have moved out of your family’s home in order to put some space between you and your system’s abusers.

Trying to switch when you’re not 100% sure of your system’s safety could absolutely cause more harm than good! The safety and well-being of your system is more important than providing headmates with opportunities to purposefully switch. There will be plenty of time in your future to learn more about your system and attempt to manage switches! Until then, it’s probably best to allow your system to function in ways that ensure your safety and the safety of your headmates.

4. Use positive triggers

Positive triggers are external stimuli that can help bring certain headmates closer to the front by reminding the system about that headmate and what they enjoy. Having a wide range of positive triggers at your disposal can help make it easier to get a headmate to switch with you! Here are some examples of what positive triggers can look like:

Music for each headmate, including playlists, albums, artists, and songs

Stimboards, moodboards, inspiration boards, and other collections of images that speak out to each headmate

Cooking, preparing, or eating a food, snack, or beverage that a particular headmate enjoys

Engaging with hobbies, media, and activities that a particular headmate is known to like

And more! Get creative with your system and brainstorm different positive triggers you can incorporate into your lives in order to help facilitate switches in the future!

5. Manage expectations

Unfortunately, not all systems are able to switch. Some hosts and other frontstuck headmates may never be able to fully leave the front. Cofronting with another headmate and allowing them to make decisions and treat the body as their own can be a great way to allow other system members to front, even if it’s not a full-fledged “switch.” Switching can look incredibly different for different systems, and even for different headmates in the same system! So don’t be too discouraged if you or your frontstuck members aren’t able to switch out fully - cofronting and being coconscious are both valid ways for other headmates to experience the world.

Where can I learn more about switching?

There’s lots of information out there to help all kinds of systems start learning about or managing switches! Here are some links to websites where you can learn more.

Note: some sites which are geared towards created, spontaneous, or endogenic systems may suggest purposeful dissociation as a way to trigger a switch. While this may be useful for some systems, adding more dissociation to the lives of those already struggling with dissociative disorders is a very bad idea and should be avoided! So if you are diagnosed with a dissociative disorder (DID, OSDD, DPDR, etc.), suspect you may have a dissociative disorder, or suspect your system is trauma-formed, it may be best to avoid following advice from sites aimed towards paromacers, those with thoughtforms, and nontraumagenic systems. For everyone’s convenience, we have starred (*) links to guides which involve purposeful dissociation so systems who already have trouble with dissociation can avoid them! If you’re not sure whether or not your system has dissociation issues, it’s best to PLAY IT SAFE and avoid these kinds of guides. Please use critical thinking and your own discretion when reading about switching online!

Terminology note: some of these sites use “tulpa” language, which is known to be racist and culturally appropriative. Please keep this in mind when browsing these sites. In our personal life, we use “paro/paromancy” language instead to avoid causing further harm to marginalized groups.

Intentional Switching (DID) from DIS-SOS

Switching and Passive Influence from DID-Research.org

*Fuliam’s Guide on how to switch from Tulpa.info*

*Malfael’s Guide to Switching from Tulpanomicon*

Our own resource post for questioning systems has lots of links to resources on dissociative disorders and other forms of plurality, many of which may have sections or advice on switching!

Questions? Comments? Something we missed?

We could write whole books on the many different aspects of switching, and how switches can vary from system to system and headmate to headmate. We’re sorry if we’ve left something out here that you or your system thinks is important! This post didn’t touch on passive influence, rapid switching, physical symptoms of switching, and many other switching-related topics. This is just a general overview with some advice on switching intentionally and voluntarily!

If you have any further questions, feel free to comment on this post or send us an ask and we’d be happy to answer to the best of our ability! We may not have all the answers, but we’re happy to share what we know. If you made it this far, thanks so much for reading! Stay well, and have a great day!