Encouraging kids to masturbate⦠dad of the year right there
Well, I donβt think I have actually written a post like that yet and I also think you may overestimate how many literal kids there are on tumblr - but since youβre handing out awards, hereβs some gentle, non-judgemental info on masturbation like a good dad would offer if asked (since teens and young people deserve honest answers to make empowered choices):
Masturbation is a very common activity. Itβs generally safe and healthy and it even comes with some benefits:Β
itβs only you, meaning thereβs no risk of pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases!Β
itβs a safe way to explore your own likes and dislikes and to try out fantasies you may have, without the emotional entanglement of involving another person (yet or at all).Β
it canβt break your heart. Sex with another person requires a lot of trust and communication and you shouldnβt rush into that just to try it out.
it can be a fun way to get to know your own body, and knowing your own body is important to take care of your health! Knowing whatβs going on down there is a good thing.Β
Itβll not ruin sex with a (future) partner. Many actually experience the opposite: getting to know your body and learning about your preferences solo actually makes sex with a partner more enjoyable and relaxed.Β
It may bring physical health benefits: itβs like a mini workout after all, plus orgasms are known to be healthy for you!Β
It can be a stress-relief and even helps some people sleep better.Β
It can actually help you live according to your values. For example, if youβre single and do not wish to have sex outside of longterm relationships, masturbation can help satisfy your needs without sacrificing your beliefs for a one night stand.Β
It allows you full flexibility without having to explain anything. You donβt like orgasms? You can just stop before you reach that point. You like to be perfectly quiet? Nobody expects you to moan if itβs only you.Β
It also doesnβt really have any side effects or negative consequences in general. Ideas such as βmasturbation causes mental illnessβ or even βmasturbation leads to blindnessβ are outdated medical myths. Thereβs no scientific evidence for that at all and it comes from times with limited knowledge on sexual health plus very strict beliefs around βsexual purityβ. Modern medicine considers masturbation a healthy activity most people do.Β
Things you should keep in mind are just:Β
You should wash your hands before. While you canβt give yourself STDs (unless you touched someone elseβs genitalia or fluids right before), you may have other germs or irritants on your hands that you donβt want down there. Also wash your hands after, thatβs just basic hygiene and respect for the next person you shake hands with.Β
Masturbation doesnβt always require putting something inside of you. But if you do want to, please only use products specifically designed for that (or your fingers). Things that werenβt made for that purpose might hurt or injure you, or they could even get stuck or break off inside of you.Β
If you donβt enjoy masturbation, you donβt need to do it. While itβs a great activity for many, itβs still just an activity. Just like hiking or playing cards or singing: if you donβt enjoy it, youβre not missing out on anything by not doing it.Β
Lastly, I also want to address this common question:Β
Masturbation doesnβt always involve pornography. Many use their own imagination or even just enjoy the touch without any (inner) movie playing. You do not need to use porn to masturbate.Β
But if (and only if) porn is something youβre curious about and maybe something youβre worried about (is it unethical or weird etc), please know:Β
itβs a very common thing to be curious about and itβs also something many people regularly consume.Β
Know that, just as with online content of other genres, shocking or extreme content sometimes gets the most clicks. This doesnβt mean itβs representative of what most people enjoy or want in real life.Β
Sex in porn is staged. Itβs meant to look good, not be realistic. Be aware that itβsΒ not a good source for sexual education.Β
The problems with the porn industry are mainly problems with the industry (such as unsafe working conditions, unfair wages etc.). The ethical problem isnβt the sex itself.Β
You can avoid some of the industry problems by seeking out ethically produced or fairtrade porn. This usually means: all workers were fairly paid, there were precautions taken that all workers are of legal age and are willingly participating, workers may get more say in which scenes they want to do etc. Those websites also often focus more on female or queer pleasure than mainstream sites do. You may need to do some research there but itβs worth itΒ