☭ Eternal Suffering, Also Gay. ☭

my

GIRL!!!!

we called them musk-ox because we thought they must be some kind of cow thing, but they are actually a goat thing; this is to a normal wild goat what a woolly mammoth is to a normal elephant, only these things survived.

and i absolutely cannot help myself because of the tizzy my brain goes into over the twin facts of

1: ice-age megafauna that is still alive! and

2: EIGHT HUNDRED POUND GOAT

you can see the goatishness a little more in their babies

i just, i am crazy over the fact that these guys are still alive on our planet

When I was selling mattresses the first time I worked with my buddy Josh. He came in to work one day with a homemade burger his wife had made. This was a huge production of burgerness spread across the backroom table like it was an altar. There was a whole array of containers holding different ingredients like avocado, bacon, sauces, the buns, the patty. It was beautiful.

When he warmed it up and was assembling I was drifting to the back room like a Looney Toon, following my nose to see what smelled so good.

I saw his meticulous burger and begged, “Can I have a bite?”

“No.”

“It smells so good. This is illegal, share one bite…”

“No.”

I pouted and wheedled but he was resolute. I went away unfulfilled.

Later that week I was lounging in the back eating a container of cut up pineapple and Josh strolled in and casually pilfered a slice of my fruit. I was outraged.

“You wouldn’t share any burger but you just stole some of my food!”

“This is cut up already, it’s meant for sharing. If you had some of my burger you could have given me something.”

“Oh like what, my cooties?”

“I might have caught the gay!”

There was a beat as I stared into this audacious straight man’s eyes before I gave in and doubled over laughing.

I don't support the mobile port HOWEVER I do enjoy the artwork, so I decided to rip the assets myself and upload it all here for free use! It has all the art, icons, ui and sprites included.

Here are some of my favourite pieces I found: