please feed the plot bunnies

✨. Current interests circling my orbit are Sonic the Hedgehog, My Hero Academia, and Resident Evil. On this blog, they're under the tags #sth and #mha and #resident evil.

✨. I love screaming about the lil losers (affectionate) who live rent-free inside my head and vibing with others who've caught the illness (brainrot). Send me asks anytime.

✨. My pronouns are she/her and if you're not sure what to call me, Rabbits or Cosy is fine.

✨. I'm here to have a good, silly time. I believe there is no moral weight in fiction, and it can be healing to explore dark topics in a safe space. Nobody's entitled to demand disclosure of your reasons. Don't Like, Don't Read. I think curating your online experience is important, and my responsibility ends at the ingredients list (the tags and trigger warnings) to inform the reader of what the fic contains.

✨. Phew, that got heavy. I've been writing fics for over a decade but posting them online like this is new and scary. Buuuut the plot bunnies thrive off of comments and encouragement, and I love finding people who also enjoy my self-indulgent shenanigans. Like whaaat, it's not just me? :0 that's so dope.

rabbit divider credit: @/kthice ✨ flower divider credit: @/ghwosting

On one hand, this means Zeno is willing to try any food that's put in front of him. On the other, it means he'll try to force it down even if he fucking hates it. It's genuinely never occurred to him that he's allowed to have preferences. But now that he's not infected and poses no more threat than the next hungry guy...

Leon's not exactly a culinary whiz. He appreciates a good breakfast; he likes what he likes and he applies that logic to his handling too. Unfortunately once he's hammered it into Zeno's dense skull that he's allowed to choose what he eats and refuse what he doesn't like, meals become challenging. His body is stuck in the 'poison??? maybe???' mode it never got to have. If they stuck to Zeno's comfort zone his diet would be cigarettes, anxiety, and OCCASIONALLY a glass of milk.

Catch Grace picking up a call from Leon at a fucking payphone asking how she introduced Emily to the concept of eating like a person. Leon sneaking out to meet up with Rebecca at odd hours of the night because his rescue with anxiety charge can't eat more than a few bites of anything he gives him and he's running out of things he knows how to cook. Basically Leon sneaking around making up a proper meal plan for Zeno without telling him that's what he's doing because Zeno starts acting weird if he thinks he's in trouble. And he does think that. Often.

The slow relief of realising nothing is wrong with Zeno, he's just Like That. For someone who hasn't been allowed to eat human food for most of their life, he has a surprisingly refined palate. He can taste quality and prefers it. He favours complex flavours and good texture. He's the snob to Leon's slob and it honestly improves both their diets for the better. Can't get away with eating the usual junk when Zeno turns his nose up at it and says the whole microwave meal tastes like depression stale bread used to mop the dishwater remnants of a vegetable soup.

Sometimes, Leon misses how Zeno talked to him before he got comfortable enough to speak his mind. Not very often but.

Zeno would admire the independence of cats. Their grace. Their capacity for absolute dumbassery. He learns slow blinks = safe and he'll take off his sunglasses to do it. Communication is very important. Tragically he runs pretty cold after losing his powers. If he ever got them back (😏) the above-average temperature it runs him would make his entire body a feline lure. God help him if he ever ended up in enclosed space full of them, like a shelter or a cafe. They'd lose him under the cats. Swarm of fat, purring locusts. Is one of them loafing across his face and blocking his air supply? Cats don't know, cats don't care.

Oh, him holding a frail little kitten like the most preciousest thing. Maybe it's the only one left from some fucked up little project. The survivor, unable to comprehend what happened to the others but understanding it's alone. Projection, who? I'm not weepy, you're weepy! He's so, so gentle. He cradles it to his chest to share his warmth. The look on his face when it starts to meow in that needy way kittens meow is heartbreaking. Latent protective instincts activated. He can shoot Redemption one-handed. "What have you got there?" — "A survivor." Catch the lab being swept by D.S.O personnel pointmanned by an ex-bioweapon with The Head Explody Pistol Ever and a confused but trusting kitten equipped into the breast pocket of his suit alongside the spare rifle ammo he keeps clinking around in there during missions. Slotted like a comfy potato. Added to inventory. Key item. Good luck charm? He is landing those headshots like a goddamn boss.

Zeno would be uncharacteristically aggressive about refusing to let the kitten go through lab screens because it DID just come out of a place where they were making the most horrifying feline-based B.O.W.s known to date. Leon would have to step in, and, recognising this is definitely personal, give him assurances and offer to be there supervising the whole thing. For the sake of my sanity (and Zeno's), the kitten is undernourished but completely clear. The research team is oohing and aahing. Leon "I've already got a cat" S. Kennedy isn't on the market for another one, but maybe it happens to be a mostly black cat and maybe Grace has been coming around to the idea of adding a feline to the household. Emily "but Mr. Leon has a cat and he's no trouble at all!" Ashcroft is very persuasive like that.

Let Zeno be the one who gets to give it to her when it's released from D.S.O custody with a certificate of good health. Not only would it be an important / emotional moment for both of them, it also skyrockets Zeno to the top of Emily's favourite list of people ever.

I want it known that Zeno is so excited about 1) getting to go somewhere he wants 2) being given an Official Handler Order that he's passionate about. it will NOT!! occur to his ass that Leon is absolutely bullshitting him until like. a random Saturday night three months after the fact.

Zeno has such a good time in there. He has a perfectly valid reason to pick up and examine every toy that catches his eye. And he's like a fucking magpie for sparkle and shine, so it's. a lot of things. Nobody dares question the intimidating man in a fine suit and sunglasses who's reading the back of a Halloween pet salon playset like it's a hitlist. Mafia bosses have to buy presents for their kids too, you know?

He's utterly fascinated. He's considering everything in the context of whether it's something Emily would enjoy but his handler is also far away so he's comfortable being a little rebellious and looking at things he's interested in beyond the scope of the mission. Like those colourful 1000-piece puzzles. Ooh. Or the Resident Evil-verse equivalent of LEGO sets. It's somewhat familiar but so, so different to what he's used to. Zeno contemplates if he can ask for these materials specifically when it's time to undergo those tests again under Leon's watch. It still hasn't sunk in that leon will never let him be treated that way again. bless him.

Just for fun, Leon finishes shopping and doubles back to spy on him. This is exactly the kind of shit he's trained for. And if people ain't questioning the Mafia-lookin' aaa father, then they're actively avoiding the handsome muscle who's either a discrete bodyguard or some kind of government tail. Jokes on them he's literally both. He takes note of what Zeno's interested in. He's absolutely going to come back some other day and get those puzzles for him. This man needs enrichment in his life like plants need water. The hardest part is gonna be convincing Zeno it's a gift and not an add-on to his perceived debt. Probably gonna have to invent some bullshit about scientifically-backed brain training. Ah well. Baby steps.

Whether through Jurassic Park or going on a fun museum trip side quest, Zeno is extremely troubled by the existence of dinosaurs. Leon pokes fun at him a bit. Until Zeno mutters that, with the cloning technology the Connections have, there is currently very little stopping a sufficiently motivated researcher from discovering a way to integrate dinosaur DNA into B.O.W.S.

Now Leon is also extremely troubled.

A phone call, sometime in the near future:

"Hey, Rebecca... Something's been on my mind. Can you hit me with some of your science talk? Yeah? Okay. Okay thanks. So... Where are we on cloning T-rexes? Generally."

"Currently the DNA in all discovered dinosaurs has been much too degraded to clone without supplementing from modern ancestors. But I suppose as cloning advances, the technology could—"

"Yeah, yeah. So. Follow up question. If some crazy millionaire decided to clone a bunch of T-rexes and infect them with some strain of the T-virus—"

"Oh, God. What have you found?"

I don't think The Connections ever gave Zeno the autonomy of even owning his own clothes, let alone being allowed to clean them. It's something he'd be very interested in, the idea of being allowed to take care of his own clothes. When they're not on missions, laundry CAN be done like normal. I think Leon shows him how the washing machine works and it becomes one of Zeno's Chores. Laundry is a new and fascinating concept. It makes him feel useful and accomplished. These things are clean and fresh because he made them so. He doesn't have to do it, he has the CHOICE of doing it, and he thrives in that difference. Leon tries to offer to take turns ONCE and Zeno looks so offended that he never asks again. Let him have this. It's some kind of weird little enrichment routine for him. He reads all the labels and separates colours. The clothes have never been treated better and Leon's laundry room smells like cigarette smoke now. The first time Leon offers to let him buy whatever detergent he wants to try breaks his brain a little. He didn't know there were options.

But back to SEWING! oh man. Being able to repair something? Restoring its use? The very concept that broken things can be mended instead of being thrown away? Very. Very appealing to Zeno. He'd be determined to learn. Leon probably gives him some of his old ripped clothing to practise on (Licker tongues are a bitch, what can he say?) and lets him go nuts. His first attempts are atrocious and Leon's absolutely useless for once, but he persists. He gets better. He discovers the joys of patches and personalised embroidery. His at-home clothes accumulate their own customisations. He's so very fond of silver accents and subtle punk goth aesthetics. He's absolutely the kind of fucking loser who'd spend 78 hours embroidering an obscure mythology icon onto one of his favourite black sweaters. Just a small patch where a breast pocket might go, but packed full of symbolisms and meanings that he'll happily start yapping about like a total theatre kid if you ask the right questions. When he's gotten good at it, Leon notices he's getting pretty good at this actually, and asks him if he can sow some extra pockets and straps onto some of his work clothes as a favour. Zeno is almost shy about doing it but absolutely fucking glows when Leon thanks him and puts the extra inventory space to good use.

When Emily needs her school uniform sown in the annoying and unexpected ways school uniforms ALWAYS need to be sown, and Grace is in a panic about it, Leon knows exactly what to do: toss it at Zeno and promise him a shiny trinket in his future if he does a good job.

There were nametag labels provided. He didn't have to parse the school's dress code with the scrutiny of a man who's skilled at finding institutional loopholes, just like he didn't have to embroider EMILY ASHCROFT on the back and add adorable little black cat accents that definitely took days because he knows it's her obsession of the month and she's been yapping in Grace's ear about adopting a black cat ever since finding out some people consider them bad luck charms. He's just showing off at this point, really.

Even Albert Wesker had to learn how to swim, and he had world-class tutors to teach him how from a young age. Seems The Connections kinda overlooked that.

Completely unrelated I'm sure, but Zeno is very reluctant to admit he can swim when asked about it. He can, he's pretty good at it and it was part of his training regiment. They punished him every subsequent time he drowned. It's just that when Leon suggests using the D.S.O's pool to sharpen up those rusty skills before he's back in the field, Zeno is absolutely fucking terrified.

Leon's 'this isn't normal' radar is a bit more attuned by now. He prods a little into what his previous experiences actually were and just about manages not to react to the absolute what the fuckery he comes out with. He buys him a thermal wetsuit that's already pretty overkill considering the pool is heated, but just the reassurance of wearing something this time has Zeno warming up to the idea. Convinces him it's going to be different, though he's still extremely wary.

Instead of being thrown into the deep end with no objective but to survive, it's being allowed to sit at the water's edge and feel that it's warm. It's being allowed the time to slip in and feel the solid tile beneath his feet because the water's only waist-deep. It's Leon encouraging, not rushing, him to show him what he knows. Gets his hair wet to help ease him past his instinctual fear of being submerged. Teaches him via demonstration how to saturate his lungs with deep breaths before he goes under. Efficient methods to conserve energy while moving through water. Zeno is genuinely uncertain if he's learning correctly because this lesson doesn't hurt, but Leon seems to think he's doing well, so perhaps he is. By the time their session is up, Zeno is completely comfortable with being in the water that he couldn't even look at properly at the start. Leon throws a fuzzy towel at him before he can even get cold.

A sweet bit of mentor & mentee for the soul.

Wesker doesn't drink or smoke. Chris is absolutely sure of this. He shows distain for his and Leon's vices. It muddies the mind and his mind is his greatest weapon, or something. Personally I think he just doesn't like feeling like he's not in control of his faculties, even if it's something as low-key as a hit of nicotine. He'll indulge in a glass of wine on occasion, but it's fussy stuff with pretentious labels and a low-to-nonexistent alcohol content.

It's the reason Leon doesn't get into Wesker's allotted space in the liquor cabinet like a spaniel rummaging in garbage when they live together. 'if the ABV ain't double digits, what's the point?' Chris's European whisky has no such protection. Chris loves his imported whiskey. Leon also loves Chris's imported whiskey.

AnYWAYS there's a mission to destroy the G-virus that goes very, very wrong. But that's like, side plot to the fact Wesker is trying to convince William to join him in defecting to Chris and Leon's Totally Real Mystery Organization under the banner of S.T.A.R.S. He is. extremely unsuccessful in this endeavour. It's a whole betrayal and a half.

I haven't decided if I want it to go as dark as my original idea entails, but regardless, Wesker's getting strangled to death with his own belt by the man he once considered his closest friend while the virus keeps him alive enough to feel every second of it. And it might be the least worst thing that happens to distract William until S.T.A.R.S. gets out of the potential contamination zone. Oh yeah, did I mention Birkin successfully synthesised the G-virus into a gas. Because he did that. Real breakthrough stuff. And it's their problem now.

In Wesker's mind, this is a perfectly calculated set of risks and choices. He's doing what he does best, reading the room and manipulating every advantage he has over Birkin to attain his goal. He could choose to sacrifice S.T.A.R.S. and kill this man in a snap. This is a controlled negotiation. The personal history, the defeat, the degradation, the physical pain, doesn't matter. He can't hurt him in any way that matters.

Unfortunately, Wesker is falling victim to his own hubris again. Forgetting that he's still human and human minds don't work like that. Losing the closest thing he had to a lifelong friend and being subjected to losing control (his worst fear) in such a violent and horrific way isn't something he can just walk away from without feeling anything, even if he recovers physically in minutes.

Doesn't help that Chris and Leon hear every minute of it because they absolutely saw it coming that Wesker would try to do something sneaky behind their backs and put a second mic on him in case he disables the first one (which he does, so they're valid for that, but cutting off contact so he can plead sincerely with Birkin isn't the evil scheming they had in mind).

Chris is very fucking distraught and doesn't know how to handle the fact Wesker got hurt on his watch. That it was to protect them, no matter what dismissive bullshit Wesker brushes it off with. All the powers of a tyrant and he still let Birkin absolutely chew him up and spit him out in order to buy them time to disable the gas. None of this was supposed to happen. None of this did happen, last time. His feelings about Wesker getting ten times more complicated because the man in front of him isn't the same man he killed, and now, after all this meddling, might never be. Making him an ally, getting to him first, using all that future knowledge to change him like this before that godhood complex could even take root, turning one of his most empowering experiences into one of his darkest moments, might just have been crueller than just shooting him in the head the moment they met again. His Wesker would certainly think so.

Leon is a bit more calmer and calculated about it. He never had any history with Wesker, so he doesn't have the same hang-ups as Chris does. He's the one who notices the European whiskey is missing when he goes to nick some from the cabinet. He also knows who took it, no matter how much Chris insists Wesker wouldn't. He grabs a spare glass and heads to the balcony attached to Wesker's room. Finds him there with the whisky, and a pack of Chris's cigarettes. Not quite the application Umbrella had in mind when they encouraged the Wesker children to steal shit to further their own goals, but whatever.

Leon doesn't say a word about it. Just sits a comfortable distance away and pours some of that good fuckin' whisky for himself. Watching Raccoon City's nightlife together while Wesker silently chain-smokes and drinks himself into a stupor. Gets some honest words out of him, kind of like he's processing it for himself and Leon just happens to be there. "We have known each other almost all our lives. I was his best man at his wedding. He asked me to be his daughter's godfather. We were a pair, a set. There was a time I would've followed him into hell, had he asked. I asked him to join me — and he killed me. Over and over again. Just to see if he could. I wish I was angry. I wish I could hate him for it. But we are both scientists at heart. It's simply in our nature to experiment and observe."

Leon's the one who calls it quits on the drinking and gets Wesker to bed when it's obvious he can't stand up without threatening to topple over the balcony. He has NEVER been this drunk, and it shows. He's saying things he would commit murder to keep secret. Chris absolutely wouldn't be able to handle it but Leon isn't Chris and he's been on the opposite end of this scenario too many times to judge. He gets him comfortable as possible, tucks his sunglasses away in their case, and makes him drink a whole glass of water. "You'll be grateful I did this in the morning, trust me."

Leon does his best to explain to him that this is Normal and he's going to be fine. Zeno is extremely doubtful. He refuses to rest until Leon makes it an Official Handler Order. Same goes with getting some hot chicken noodle soup into him. I like to imagine him snuggled on the couch with his weighed blanket and something mild on TV for background noise, trying not to doze off and failing miserably. To the surprise of No One Except One (1) Person (Zeno), he's feeling much better the next day.

Maybe Leon isn't such a bad handler after all.

Alternatively, his weakened immune system after nearly dying to RCS leaves Leon wide open to pick up some kind of nasty secondary infection. He was coughing up an awful lot of blood. You know what loves a warm, wet environment? Pneumonia. Bronchitis. Upper respiratory infection. He develops a cough that could rumble floors. You know what else he is? Stubborn. Stubborn, stubborn old man who won't admit he's sick. Tough guy who scoffs at the idea of cough syrup. Leon S. 'dishes out so much care and concern for others but can't take it when it's directed at him' Kennedy.

Zeno's first act of real disobedience against his handler is to discreetly inform Sherry that he is sick. In his mind, it's better be punished for pulling strings to make Leon recover quickly than it is to risk being passed along to someone worse if his handler is deemed too unwell to perform his duties. He is Nervous but Determined. That rebellious streak does come in handy for powering him through his fear.

His grave air of resignation accidentally scares the hell out of Sherry, who thinks Leon is on death's door or something.

Leon ends up with a hospital appointment he's not happy about. He knows there's only one person who could've snitched. He's sulking the whole way. Zeno accepts his grumpiness with well-meaning but misguided 'there's going to be hell to pay later, but at least he'll be fine' and is SUCH a good boy at playing caretaker for his handler. Takes his role so, so seriously. This is an Important Mission and he will Complete It Properly, even when he thinks the only thing in it for him at the end is punishment. Listening to the doctor. Asking questions. Going through the list of medications with a fine-toothed comb. Memorising all the dosages, timing, and whether they're before or after meals.

Leon keeps up the grumpy front but he's secretly touched Zeno cares so much. Never really had someone who'd do all that for him. Leon's a bastard when he's sick and he knows he is, but Zeno seems to have endless patience for him. He's gentle but persistent. Any doubts Leon has about whether Zeno's happy with this arrangement or just putting up a front are wiped away in the meticulous way his pillows are fluffed, anything he wants is brought to him, sometimes before he even has to ask, and his medications show up with clockwork precision. Acts of service as a language of care, my beloved. Sick old man and his emotional support dog.

When Leon is recovered from his admittedly pretty bad bout of illness, Zeno stands by awaiting the consequences of his disobedience. Leon agrees and takes him out, and he's confused but willing, trusting his handler will settle on a punishment suitable for the crime.

Needless to say, Zeno is very confused as to why Leon thinks being spoiled with several new shiny trinkets for his collection and a nice lunch is a discouraging punishment. Zeno. It's not. He's thanking you, you dense muffin.

Conclusion: handler is still very bad at handling.