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@cosmicmelange

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âIt is awful to want to go away and to want to go nowhere.â
â Sylvia Plath, The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath (via books-n-quotes)
This resonates so much with how I feel these days, since I am going away for a while to Amsterdam, a place which excites me incredibly, but at the same time I really liked how things were in the last couple of months in Vienna.
I keep reminding myself that I will come back. However, nothing will stay the same, surely I also won't, and I actually don't want to try so hard to keep things how they are and I just want to keep the good memories in mind and let life surprise me because it's a feeling I forgot recently.
â I am eternally, devastatingly romantic, and i thought people would see it because âromanticâ doesnât mean 'sugaryâ. Itâs dark and tormented â the furor of passion, the despair of an idealism you cannot attain. â Catherine Breillat
âThings donât have purposes, as if the universe were a machine, where every part has a useful function. Whatâs the function of a galaxy? I donât know if our life has a purpose and I donât see that it matters. What does matter is that weâre a part. Like a thread in a cloth or a grass-blade in a field. It is and we are. What we do is like wind blowing on the grass. [âŚ] Weâre in the world, not against it. [âŚ] The world is, no matter how we think it ought to be. You have to be with it. You have to let it be.â
â Ursula Le Guin, The Lathe of Heaven (via exhaled-spirals)
My interpretation of the album cover of the swedish prog band TrettioĂĽriga Kriget (Thirty years' war in swedish). It is still work in progress... loved its design, the typography and of course loved their music.
When I saw a photo of Anekdoten, where Peter Nordins -the drummer- wears a t-shirt of this album cover, I wanted to have one so bad.
It is impossible to find and buy one of this t-shirts, so why not print it myself?
Anekdoten, founded in Sweden 1991

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Spontaneous burst of anxiety.
The evidence of how moody I am.
I painted the first one just an hour before the second one.
They were both unplanned.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Surda aklima gelenleri unutmadan bi kenara attiriveriyim istedim, 2 cĂźmleyi 1 saattir bir araya getiricem diye beynim sikildi. Kafamin icindeki durumu bana daha da net gĂśstermis oldu bu.
Uzun zamandir bi girdabin icindeyim. Inisler, sozde cikislar ve daha derin dalislar yaptigim upuzun bi dÜnem. Aslinda milyonlarca sey yasadim bu arada, cok fazla seyle yuzlestim, cok korktugum cok dßstßgßm oldu. Ama tam da az Ünce bir dßrtßyle blog arsivime gÜz atmamla icime korkunc bi sikinti cÜktß. Bu dÜnemi oldugu gibi inisiyle cikisiyla bana kattiklariyla kabul etmeye coktan hazirdim. Ama Arsive bakarken sanki arada 3-4 sene atlamisim gibi hissettim. 2016/17 den sonrasi kocaman bir bosluk. Neler yaptim, neler hissettim, neler dßsßndßm, ne heyecanlar yasadim... Gßnlßklerim durmuyo mu, duruyo. Bu gßne kadar yazmaya devam da ettim, ama eskiden cok daha sik okurdum gßnlßklerimi, fotograflara bakar, blogta paylastiklarimi gÜzden gecirirdim. Kendi timeline´imda nerde oldugumu az bucuk bilirdim. Sanki istedigim yerde degilsem, istedigim seyi yapiyo degilsem bunu cok da gec olmadan farkederdim. Ama son 3 sene gercekten kayip gibi geliyor bana. Sadece yerimde durup her seyi izlemisim gibi.

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-daha geceye cok olmasina ragmen.-
TĂźm albĂźm dinlenmeli.